Pretend like you didn’t love me when you clipped those necklaces around my neck,

 
The ones you had picked out especially for me and asked the people I loved most if I would like them when you knew you didn’t have to do that because you were the one I loved most. 

Pretend that you’re perfectly okay from the outcome of us because while you’re able to distract yourself by talking to her, I sit in bed at night re reading the messages thinking, wondering, how I screwed up, how I made you stop loving me when all those paragraphs slowly turned into hatred. 

I didn't think it was possible to ever hate you, but I didn’t think it was possible for your words that once meant everything, slowly destroy me when I know you say the same things to her 
Pretend like I don’t know the stuff you two say about me, knowing you were both my best friends as I watched you pick each other over me. 

 
Pretend that necklace will look good on her when you know that your initial sat perfectly on my chest. The shade of silver you picked to match my skin tone. The design, the brand, everything you knew would look good on me, because you cared. You loved me. 

Pretend you wont miss having someone there for you. someone who worried about you and wanted to see you happy. someone who really cared for you and loved you and simply wanted the best for you, yet all you could do was learn to hate me because of some other girl who won’t be as perfect for you as I was. 

Pretend like you don’t look at her and remember how perfect we were together and you know that you’ll never love her how you loved me.  

Pretend like the second you lose feelings for her you won’t miss me to death. 

You won't miss the daily hugs, waking up to Good morning texts, the way you chased me around your basement, the way you cried while I held you in my arms because the thought of losing me killed you, yet you were willingly ready to leave for a girl who won’t love you half as much as I did. 

Pretend like you didn’t want us to work out. That you didn’t see a future while I still remember how you planned it. The timeline, the house, the wedding, the family, everything we could ever want and more. Remember that future you couldn’t see without me and now all you have left of me is the memories. 

The memories. The memories we said we would tell our kids about. The one where we were driving home from the mall, and it started snowing so we played Christmas music with your whole family. I knew I would always want to tell my kids about my first love, but I didn’t think I would have to tell them about how I cried for days and lost weight because I couldn’t eat when the sight of you made me feel so alone that my heart sunk into my stomach.  

Pretend like you don’t miss me yet the second you see me in the hallway with the guy I told you “Not to worry about” who starts talking to me and I watch as you do a double take of me. Pretend you don’t miss me when I'm showing my friends a new dress I want in the color you told me I should wear more often, and I watch you look back and forth at me and the dress. Pretend like you moved on yet if you really moved on you would be able to go five minutes without staring until I catch you.  

Pretend that you didn’t consider me your person for the last two years. The person you could always go back to. The one who would always listen and help you in any way they could. The one person who you could really talk to and wouldn’t judge you for your feelings. I was the only person who stuck by you through the times when you felt like you had nothing.  

Nothing. That’s what you left me with. You wanted to leave and took one of my best friends with you. You said it was stupid and we wouldn’t have ever lasted yet you still convinced me you would fight for us. For me. You promised you wanted to be with me, but still didn’t care because all that matters to you is your happiness and your feelings. 

Pretend that you aren't still obsessed with me yet you still text me every chance you get to call me out on something when you don’t know the whole story and saying you regret it all but we both know you’re playing pretend when you say that cause you said you really loved me first.

 
Pretend you hate me when we both know that you loved me more than anyone else in the world. Your words that said you would give the world to me if you could and now you want to take that all back like it was nothing, simply because you met someone better. She’s the new “girl of your dreams” while this all feels like a dream.

More like a nightmare. The nightmare I've been trying to wake myself up from for the last month and a half, because you really taught me what it was like to be loved by a man, or so I thought, until you took back every word. I am still clueless on how someone moves on that quick from the person they “truly loved.” They say if you really love someone you have to let them go but I can’t let go of the words you said and the actions you displayed that you claim was all pretend.  

Pretend like it was my fault that you just “stopped loving me” when I fought so hard to make you happy and keep you in my life.  

Pretend like you don’t flirt with her in front of me to make me jealous when deep down I’m happy it’s not me because if I were her I wouldn’t want to know that you were meant to be with someone else, that someone else being me. 

Maybe I'm a fool but if we were to ever play pretend one more time I would still do it again.