Exit | Teen Ink

Exit

April 30, 2009
By GigglyAmbar SILVER, Washington, District Of Columbia
GigglyAmbar SILVER, Washington, District Of Columbia
5 articles 0 photos 22 comments

Why are you here?
Bothering me, wasting my time, you say
you're helping me --> yeah whatever. Go away, get out of my life.
I am done with you and who you've made me become. I'm moving on and
leaving you behind. You have no place in my heart, mind or body.
You've done nothing but pull me down and leave me there.
I've hit rock bottom because of you and I am not going back.
To bad for you > I found my way out.
I'm sick of you. I 'm asking you to leave and there is the door.


The author's comments:
This poem is about anyone or anything that can control you and set you on the wrong path. The possibilities could be drugs or alcohol or certain people.

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This article has 6 comments.


on Oct. 17 2011 at 8:18 pm
RayBaytheDinosaur GOLD, Hampton, South Carolina
18 articles 17 photos 159 comments

Favorite Quote:
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

The concept was really great but maybe you could work on your rhythym a bit so it flows better, I have alot of problems with that too lol but other than that it's a great poem =D

on Oct. 16 2011 at 7:25 pm
GigglyAmbar SILVER, Washington, District Of Columbia
5 articles 0 photos 22 comments
Of Course I will and thanks !! When people bully others it's because they have their own problems or are just followers. Never be afraid to speak your mind. Whoever is bullying you is just pathetic.

on Oct. 16 2011 at 5:00 pm
VioletRoyal BRONZE, Lebanon, Indiana
3 articles 0 photos 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To be great takes time." - NK

I wish I could get the courage to actually say this to the people in my life that constantly bully me every day.  Good job! :)  If you could, I would really appreciate it if you could read my poem called "My Love" that I entered into the poetry forum.  It is my first poem that I have ever written and I made it special for my boyfriend and I would really like to give it to him this Friday.  I would love your input on how I could make it better! :)

on Oct. 16 2011 at 3:22 pm
GigglyAmbar SILVER, Washington, District Of Columbia
5 articles 0 photos 22 comments
Thanks, and yeah I've re read my poem so many times I didn't even notice the mistake. Thanks again

on Oct. 16 2011 at 1:55 pm
snowybutterfly DIAMOND, Fremont, California
59 articles 1 photo 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
Gold teeth, Grey Goose, tripping in the bathroom, blood stains, ball gowns, trashing the hotel room, we don't care, we're driving Cadillacs in our dreams --Lorde

This poem is wonderful! I loved how you mixed your powerful words with >'s and casual dimissal--very creative. There were deep lines that I could totally identify with, and also the simple last line that made me think maybe I could let it go. :) I also thought your line breaks were excellently placed. 

 

Don't forget the "to-too" difference, though. 

 

 Marvelous work!


on Jul. 31 2009 at 8:35 pm
WriterDancerLover GOLD, Fontana, California
15 articles 1 photo 25 comments
Hi! Thanks a lot for the comment on my poem. =] Um tips? Well, the best advice I could give is to always have a pen or pencil and a small notepad with you to jot down ideas. When I sit down and intentionally write, it doesn't usually work out, but when things come spontaneously it has a better effect. And another thing I do is read my poems out loud when I finish them to work out line breaks and rhythmic issues. Again, thanks for the comment, and keep on working with the passion you have! =]