i. Sinking

Surrounded by the murky waters of disgust and despair,

Slowly sinking deeper and deeper into the unknown abyss.

My body is paralyzed.

Limbs dangling from my body lifelessly and without purpose,

Confusion strikes my mind like a cold whip crackling in the still air,

The cold waters entomb me like a parasitic plague.

Surrounded by silence all around, my thoughts manage to consume me.

Entangling upon themselves and lashing back at me.

It’s my fault I’m down here, It’s my fault I’m sinking.

All my words would serve no purpose down in the abyss and so I keep them to myself.

Knowing I will never be saved,

Knowing I cannot be helped.

I try to escape but my efforts are proven useless.

Only causing more pain and suffering.

ii. Drowning

I’ve reached the bottom of the abyss,

My lungs are filled with water and self-doubt.

I can’t breathe, my mind presses against my skull like a balloon about to pop.

The voices get louder and louder until they start to strangle me.

I’m drowning,

Drowning in the bottom of the abyss.

No one to save me, no one to help me.

Alone with my mind and my demons.

My limbs start to awaken, they flail around and crave any ounce of freedom they can get.

Until suddenly they stop.

I lay motionless at the bottom.

I’ve surrendered.

iii. Swimming

A light shines through to the bottom where I lay.

The water’s strength diminishes.

I can move.

My legs kick and my arms reach,

Tired and exhausted I muster up every bit of energy I have left.

The illusion of joy and happiness is sensational.

I strive to reach the top,

To be free at last.

The light looms closer and closer until its unbearable.

I’ve reached the top.

My body is bathed in the warm illumination,

Comforted by the glow I lay atop the waters.

Relaxed and calm.

I’m free.