He Altered Your Future | Teen Ink

He Altered Your Future

December 29, 2011
By StellaPrema GOLD, Petaluma, California
StellaPrema GOLD, Petaluma, California
10 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Be the change you want to see in the world" -Mahatma Gandhi

He is your world, the one thing you can’t push from your mind. Like a magnet, his image is forcefully shoved back into the front of your thoughts every moment of every day. His dark, yet handsome face finds you in your dreams at night. You reach out, pleading, but he is yanked away as the bright sun greets you in the early hours of daylight.

You often wonder what life would be like without him, leaving you empty and without direction. Who would you be if you had not met him? He left you desolate and starving for hope and everyday you look in the mirror and examine the bruises left behind. They are slowly fading away, but in your mind they will remain visible forever.

Leaving the house has become like exposing yourself to hungry, ravishing animals. Eyes linger on you and seem to penetrate your very soul. In unnecessary hope you chase shadows, believing them in rare instances to be him. However, they always turn out to be the shadow of a trash bin or even the local bakery boy, the one who used to look at you with kind eyes and who now glances at you with fleeting looks of pity.

Everyone knows what happened, and this fact only makes life worse. In the last week, since the incident, you have tried to leave the world many times. Life is still clinging to you though, unwilling to let go of proof of material cruelty. You want to return to the way things were, when you were so happy and had a promising future. Now homework has slipped deep into the crevices of your desk and meals pass by without acknowledgment.

You wonder if this will last forever as you stare out your bedroom window into the twilight sky. The beautiful colors and dark mountains in the distance do not register in your mind as you scour the streets for any sign of him. He was your rapist, after all, and you only want to beg him to give back your life.

The author's comments:
I really enjoy writing about important social issues and trying to embody the emotions of victims and experienced people in my work. This piece was written to portray how I believe rape victims must feel, and how their lives alter permanentely.

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