Where I belong | Teen Ink

Where I belong

August 15, 2011
By Darlalinda GOLD, Hagatna, Other
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Darlalinda GOLD, Hagatna, Other
11 articles 11 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you think it's time to let go, just let go. For there is no point in looking back at what you have lost. For the road of life was never meant to be travel backwards."


I waved at my dad as I got ready to leave for my flight. Will this be the last time I see dad? I hope not.

Hi My name is Alexandra De Luca. I was heading to 8th grade when my mother died with cancer. Since dad was hardly home due to his business career and too much traveling, he send me away to boarding school. Thinking it was a great idea, which is was, but I still prefer living at home.

As my dad drove from the airport to our house in Laguna Hills, I was amazed on how much has changed since I last been in LH. A junior in high school, I am excited to see how Laguna Hills High school is going to be like! But the thing that makes me excited the most is knowing that I changed a lot! I lost all that extra baggage I used to carry, Got rid of my braces, and I learned how to dress to impress!! Thanks to all that modeling class I took back at my old school in Australia. I wonder if anyone will recognize me.

Today is the first day of classes! I'm sitting in my mustang, deciding if I should get down or ditch school, but then I didn't get all dressed up to ditch school. So after breathing in and out for about eternity, I finally got up the nerves to get out of the car. As I made my way to the entrance of the school, students all around me were staring and some were whispering to each other. I recognized most of them, but I ignored them and continued my way into the school. As I head into the office to check up with the principle on my classes, I bumped into someone. "Uh excuse me," I said without looking up and continued my way into the office. After receiving my locker number and my class schedule, I left the office in search for my locker. I walked past a group of guys and girls, and by the way they dressed and looked, I knew this was the popular crowd! To my surprise, somewhere out in the group a girl screamed "Oh my Goshh!!! No way, Ally? Alexandra De Luca???!?! is that really you?! I'd be DAMNED!!"

I stare at the girl, shocked at her outburst. Something about her face looks familiar, and then it hit me. "Jeezz DeeAndra??? Wow!!!". DeeAndra Atrox my best friend!! We ran to each other and hugged, while people were staring at us like we were crazy. "Its been a long long long time Ally, I've missed you! Come and I will introduce you." So we made our way to the group of guys and girls, and Deea started introducing me to the others, until she came to this hot looking guy. "Ally, you remember Dean, my twin brother?" I just stared at him and smiled. Oh my gosh, Dean the jerk who I had a total crush on in middle school. "I guess, since he's your twin brother, I don't think I can forget the face." Dean just smiled at me and shook my hand, "Nice to meet you again, though the first time wasn't so nice, since you didn't bother looking at the person you bumped into." He said, "Oh my gosh, that was you? I'm sorry, I was kind of lost." Dean just laughed and said, "It's cool!" Then he left.

My first few days of school was awesome! Not only was I in the popular crowd, guys who used to pick on me for being fat and ugly, were drooling after me. But I don't want those guys, I just want Dean Atrox. Though I know I can never have him! I thought I got over the crush I had for him in the 7th grade, but unfortunately I'm still crushing on him still. And it sucks, cause he doesn't like me and he don't even notice me. As I make my way to the lunch table, the group well already in discussion about a party. "Ally, you have to come to my party this weekend!" Deea said as I sat down next to her. I thought for a while then turned to her and said "Only if you'll pick me, since dad won't let me drive after 5 speeding tickets I got this week." She smiled and swatted me in the arm, "That's what you get for driving a mustang! Haha Alright I'll pick you up around 7 PM! You better be ready!! She laughs and head off to cheer practice.

It's Saturday!!! So I'm outside in my front porch waiting for Deeandra to come pick me up, wondering where in the world is she, and why is she late?!! It's almost 8 O'Clock here and she hasn't showed. Finally a nice black Tundra stops in front of the house. To my dismay, it's not DeeAndra but some of the stinking football team. As I make my way out to check what they wanted, I get a surprised. Sitting in the driver's seat, the oh-so-gorgeous, Dean Atrox.

"Uh what are you guys doing here?" I asked annoyed that it has to be Dean in front of my house and not DeeAndra. "We're here to pick you up, so get in!" Dean Said. "Uh no you're not and I believe it was DeeAndra who's picking me up, not YOU!" I said and started walking back to the house, all of a sudden I feel strong arms wrapped around me and was carrying me back to the car. "You're not getting away that easy, Alexandra," Dean said as he opened the passenger seat and sat me down. Now I was really ticked off, who does he think he is anyway. And why in the world did Deea send her brother instead of someone else! I'm definitely going to kill her!!

The drive to the Atrox's home was quiet, since I was totally ignoring Dean. And sensing that I was pissed off, he didn't bother to talk. As we got their house, the party was already in full swing. I jumped out of the truck not bothering to thank Dean or wait for him, I ran straight into the house in search for Deea. Fortunately she was busy making out with her boyfriend in the kitchen, leaving me to cool off my humiliation and to enjoy the party. So I found a group of girls and started making my way to the dance floor! So we danced and danced, and boy was the party awesome. People from other schools were crashing the party, but knowing the Atrox, everyone is welcome! As I made my way to see if Deea and free, I caught Dean staring at me, but thinking that he probably is thinking the worst of me, I made my way to the kitchen and got myself a beer. I sat down on the counter drinking my drink, when all of a sudden came in a wasted Deeandra.

"Well look who's here, the girl who claims to be my friend and promised to pick me up but never did! Would you care to explain that?" I asked Deea as she walked in smiling. "I'm sorry Ally, but honestly knowing Dean, it was hard to argue my way out of it!" I just stared at her like she was crazy "You are definitely wasted Deea!" I said and she laughed. So we sat in the kitchen talking about her latest fling and how much she missed me while I was away. After what felt like forever, I excused myself and went in search for the bathroom, but unfortunately the bathroom downstairs is being occupied, so Deea told me I can use the bathroom upstairs. And so I made my way upstairs to the restroom. Did my business and then came out and was about ready to head back down the party. But all of a sudden, I was pulled into a dark room...

Boy was I scared!!! I tried getting out of the person's grip, but whoever it was, was too strong. So I gave up and started to cry. "Who the hell are you? and what do you want?" I asked. Then all of a sudden the person loosen his grip on me, but being my stupid self dashed for the door only to be pinned up against the wall. Now I really had. "Let go of me creep!" Then all of a sudden I hear this familiar voice. "Please Ally, stop running from me!" It was Dean.

"Dean?! what is wrong with you? Are you drunk?" I asked panicking. "No I am not drunk Ally. I just want to talk, but every time I try talking to you, you always run. Why?" He asked. Tears started to fall from my eyes, "You have?" I asked, "Yes, do you have any idea how much it hurts to know that you're the only girl who doesn't notice me?" Dean said as he wipes my tears away with a kiss. By now I was all over him. Letting him hold me in his arms, while he whispers sweet nothings to me. I must be dreaming, I thought to myself. We laid on his bed for a while, talking about how we feel. Then we made out couple of times. Finally things seemed to be heating up, so I pulled away from him. "I'm sorry Dean, but I gotta go!" As I got up to leave, he grabbed my arm and pulled me back down on the bed making me laying under him. He looked me in the eye and said "Ally, don't you get it? I'm not going to let you go!" And with that he started kissing me.

I was confused and yet I was dazzled. God, I really do love him, but does he really love me? As I lay naked in bed with the guy I've been dying to be with, I was filled with so many questions. I must have been really drunk last night to have slept with him. I gently got off the bed, trying not to wake Dean, as I put my clothes and left the house. By the time I got home it was 7 AM and dad wasn't home. So I went up to my room, showered, then put on fresh clothes and went back to sleep. By the time I woke up, I had 10 missed calls and 5 messages. Without looking or listening to any of it I deleted them and made my way downstairs to grab something to eat. As I sat in the kitchen eating lasagna, the phone rang, and so I answered it. "Ally is this you?" asked the person on the other line, "Yeah, the one and only!" I said, "Oh Thank goodness, This is Deea, what happened to you last night? Did you leave the party?" She asked, I thought for a second deciding if I should tell her that I hooked up with her brother, but then to my surprised I said "Yeah, I ditched! Sorry, I wasn't feeling well!" Deea just laughed and then she said "Well that's because you drank too much last night! Well I'm glad you're feeling better!" Then she hanged up.

It's been a month since I've last seen Dean. After our hookup, I thought it was best that I not speak or see him. I've been feeling sick for the past couple of days. I didn't feel like my usual self. I was always tired and Hungry! Then one weekend, Deeandra and I went out for ice cream, and I probably ate about 5 or more cones of ice cream. Deea being shocked with my big appetite jokingly said "Gosh Ally, slow down on the ice cream! You're acting like a pregnant lady!" And she started laughing. But when she said Pregnant, that's when the light bulb went on and I passed out.

I woke up to worried faces over me; Apparently Deea freaked out and called her brother, and I waking up in the back of a car was staring right back at those gorgeous green eyes. I freaked and got up feeling a little kind of woozy and so I went right back down. "Are you ok?" Dean asked. I just closed my eyes and nodded. "Please take me home," I said as Deeandra drives me home.

I'm so scared. It can't be. As I stare at the results of my pregnancy test. Positive. How am I suppose to tell Dad about this? I can't hide, and worst of all, What will Dean think? As I thought through on my situation, I thought it was best to hide it. Plus Dad is hardly home and I don't have to hang with Deeandra and them any more. I'll just seclude myself. And that's what I did. Until dad started noticing the way I've been acting. "Alexandra De Luca!!" he said and started crying. "How long have you been hiding this?"

Oh my. Dad totally blames himself that I am pregnant. I thought he was going to murder me, but my dad. He's wonderful! He was disappointed in me, but he was still going to support me. When I suggested abortion, he looked at me horrified, "You are going to raise that child!" He said and hugged me. I was relieved dad didn't go ballistic on me. Now that I don't have to worry about him, Now I gotta think of a good excuse on why I keep ignoring Deea. But most of all Dean.

As I got my things out of my locker, Deeandra approached me. "What is wrong with you? You keep ignoring my text or my calls, and you don't even hang with me any more. What's up?" She asked. I just looked her feeling guilty and said "Look I'm sorry, but I've been busy!" and with that I walked away. After that, Deea has been ignoring me, pretty much the whole group has been ignoring me. Well its better that way, I thought to myself. I'm not ready to reveal my pregnancy. As I walk out of school heading towards my car, I bumped into someone, and being annoyed I looked up to snap at the person, only to be caught in green eyes.

Dean. "We need to talk Ally! What happened?" He said. "Dean, we have nothing to talk about, so please move so I can leave!" I said, "What are you saying Ally? That whatever happened between us that night didn't mean a thing to you?" he asked. I could tell he was crushed, but it was for the best. "Yes!" I said and walked away, knowing the longer I was near him, I would burst out crying. I just wish it was easy. As I made my way home, I went straight to my room, crying myself to sleep. I was broken and confused. I hated myself. I hated keeping secrets from people, especially those that mean the most to me.

As I woke up, I was sweating and panting. It was only 3 AM and I was in so much pain. Dad hearing my cries rushed into the room, "Dad, my... Water.... BROKE!!! I screamed, boy the look on my dad's face at the moment could have had me rolling in laughter if I wasn't in so much pain. He was freaking out, so in a rush he carried down to the car and rushed me to the hospital. By the time I got there my contractions were getting worst.

I smiled as I stared at my baby boys green eyes. "You've got his eyes!" I said. My dad was so excited, he was practically hovering over the baby and I. As I lay there admiring my baby boy, I was shocked to see Deeandra and her parents walked into the room. "Why didn't you tell me?" Deea asked as she came and hugged me. "I'm sorry!" I said crying, "how did you know?" I asked her, "Your dad called my parents, apparently they knew all along, but never said a word until now!" She said, "Can I hold him?" a voice said from the door. Standing there was the love of my life.

As Dean came in the room, the others went out, leaving the three of us together. "Why didn't you tell me Ally?" He said, I just shrugged and tears came flowing out of my eyes. "Don't you get it? I've loved you since the day my sister brought you to our house, you were the first and only girl who has ever caught my attention, even when you came back, I thought I couldn't be happier!" Dean said, as he kissed my tears away. "I love you so my Ally! I really do, I just wish you could see and accept that!" He said while stroking my face. "I love you too Dean!"

Its been 15 years now. Not only did I find happiness 15 years ago, but I also married the love my life. I finished high school while taking care of De'Andre Atrox, waiting for daddy to finish up his BA at Berkeley. But since both our families are financially independent, money was a no problem for us. By the time our son turned 4 years old, Dean graduated and is taking care of his father's business, which will one day be De'Andre's inheritance, since he's the first born grandson in the Atrox family. But as for my father's business, he has left everything to me. I missed my daddy, but I will always remember the great times we had. Not only did he supported me while I was pregnant, he also knew what was best for me, so instead of keeping his promise not to tell Dean's parents, he told them. IF he didn't, I bet you that today, I wouldn't be Alexandra De Luca Atrox, the wife of Dean Atrox, and the mother of 3 children.



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on Aug. 17 2011 at 11:24 am
Willflower.-.-. BRONZE, Yuma, Arizona
2 articles 0 photos 72 comments

Favorite Quote:
This is us. This is who we are. We demand attention.

Amazing! I loved it! So realistic