Here I was only 9 years old caught in-between the fire of my mom and dad. It all begins when my day says his moving to Puerto Rico. In reality the only reason why he wants to leave is because his wife tells him too. At 9 years old you can’t do anything but to think it’s your entire fault and just say okay.

The next day comes by so fast my cheeks are rosy red and tears running down my face. I never thought this day would come. Why does it hurt so much? A couple of months pass by and I never stopped thinking of him. Years go by since talking to him and all I can think is why he hasn't called.

I’m all grown up. The day comes when my mom sits me down and I can already tell something is going on by the silence in the room. My mom asks me would I like to see my dad. With tears running down my face I tell her my dad? I don’t know my dad the word dad does not exist to me.

Ever since this day I am scared to trust. My dad made it hard for me to ever put trust in to a friend, a guy or anyone. I’m scared to get hurt. I tend to push people away because I don’t want to get too attached and then the same thing happens all over again. I feel like I can’t move on because of the trauma I went through with my dad.

I have a fear of people coming into my life and leaving to soon. Sometimes I find love in all the wrong places. I never felt that father, daughter relationship and I try and find it in another guys to fill that place. But it’s time to face my fear and let the past go cause I won’t move forward without letting go of the past.