Hello daddy,
It’s me again, I just needed to talk. It’s been awhile since you left and I don’t even really remember you. I think about you almost everyday, and I think about the siblings that I probably will never meet. I just needed to get some things off of my mind. Are you still there? Watching me? I’ve thought about this a lot, and if you can actually see me. Sometimes, at night, when I’m crying about everything that is going wrong, I feel like you’re there. Watching me. Making sure everything is alright. And sometimes, when mommy and I sit there and cry, I feel like you’re there with us, drying our tears. But sometimes, when I want a hug, or when I want to talk, I remember that you aren’t actually here. It makes me sad sometimes when I remember that you are gone. Did it hurt when you died? From that illness? I don’t know what you were sick with, but I’m sorry. I hope it wasn’t some horrendous disease, I hope that it didn’t slowly kill you, making you suffer even more. But we all ended up suffering in the end. Because we lost you. My mom lost her partner, I lost my daddy. My siblings lost their daddy, and your parents lost their child. It all affected us. And everyday, when people ask who my daddy is, I don’t know what to say. The person I think of is you, but the person I say is my stepfather. I feel bad about this, but I don’t want everyone to know that my daddy is gone. I don’t want people to feel bad for me. I’m sorry if I have disappointed you. I’m so sorry. I don’t mean to let you down. But hey, when it is my time to go, me and you can walk hand in hand. Living the life that we never had. I have to go now. I’ll talk to you next Sunday.
I love you Daddy,
-Katie