Standing Up This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

July 20, 2010
“You stupid lesbo,” he says as he pushes me into a row of lockers. Panic panic. “You're so stupid,” he sneers. “I saw you kiss her. Why did you do that?” He tries to trip me. Oh God, where is an adult when I need one?

I guess I should have seen it coming. I was stupid for even letting myself fall into this trap.

It's sophomore year of high school and I'm in my school's musical. After rehearsal one evening I'm waiting on the stairwell for my brother to finish crew. I'm working on some geometry problems when a guy sits down next to me. I don't know his name, but I've seen him hanging around crew before.

“What are you doing?” he asks.

“My homework,” I answer, without looking at him.

“That's boring. C'mon, let's go for a walk,” he says, standing up. I know I shouldn't. He has never been particularly nice to me. But for some reason I decide to go, simply because I'm not thinking.

We start walking down the darkened hallways, making small talk, until I realize that we are in an empty corridor out of earshot of the adults. That's when he corners me.

“Do you fight?” he asks. I don't quite know what he means.

“I'm really more passive aggressive,” I answer slowly. That's when he starts pushing me and bringing up that incident he witnessed.

Now he's messing up my hair. “There, now it matches the rest of you,” he laughs smugly. “So are you really a lesbo? Or are you bi?”

“Neither. I'm straight,” I answer shakily. He shakes his head and grins evilly.

“Then why did you kiss a girl? She's hot and you're not,” he states, like it's an obvious fact that ugly girls and pretty girls should never kiss. Which I'm not. Ugly, that is.

“Look, it was just a peck on the lips. Tons of girls do that to greet each other and say good-bye nowadays, genius,” I shoot back. I see the look in his eyes, and the pit of my stomach sinks as I realize, Now I'm gonna get it.

We're by the stairs now, and he grabs me around the waist, trying to push me off the stairs. “I should just lock you out in the rain so your hair frizzes,” he grunts as he struggles with me. “Then you'll feel as ugly as you are.”

Luckily we're about the same size, so I plant my feet firmly and manage to maintain my balance. He gives up and instead tries to toss me into the potted plants. I push him away and start walking toward the main hallway where there are bound to be other people. Breathe. Look strong. Don't entice him.

He comes up behind me as I turn down a hall that leads to the main corridor. I can see the shapes of people passing by at the other end. It's like the light guiding me to Heaven, my salvation.

“I could smack your a-- right now and you wouldn't do anything,” he baits.

“Yes I would,” I declare as I plow forward, because what can I say? “You're right, I won't defend myself against sexual harassment”? Then I feel his hand smack my behind, and my temper ignites, though I attempt to control my actions. I whirl around, grabbing his arms and pinning them to his sides.

“Don't. You. Ever. Do. That. Again,” I growl through clenched teeth. He smirks and shakes free. I turn and push through the doors to the open, lit hallway and have never been so relieved to be among civilization.

I grab my brother and we go home. I don't cry until I am alone in my room. My mom hears my sobs, however, and comes in to soothe me.

“I wasn't strong,” I cry in her arms. “I didn't fight back. I know you taught me to never let a guy boss me around, but I couldn't stand up for myself!”

She pats my hair and calms me down. “Sometimes sticking up for yourself means using your brain, not your brawn. Think about what would have happened if you had punched him. He could have seriously hurt you, and you both would have been in trouble. But you didn't give him that chance. You used your head and got yourself to a safe place. That takes a strong woman too,” she says. I go to bed with this thought in my head.

I see him in the halls the next day and hold my breath, wondering what he's going to do. We pass each other without a word or even a glance. It's like nothing happened.

I exhale in relief. I head to Spanish class and slide into my desk next to my friend and start chatting – as though I wasn't threatened last night. I tell myself I've grown from this experience. I am a little bit stronger and a little bit wiser for making a mistake and learning from it.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.

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This article has 21 comments. Post your own now!

Bookworm134 said...
Nov. 30, 2015 at 8:17 pm
This honestly made me cry, because I finally realized how cruel some people can be. You're brave, braver than I could ever be, and you stood up for yourself. I can tell, that somewhere in this world, a person has been inspired because of you. Your bravery is showing others that they can be the same way. :)
mplo said...
Nov. 21, 2015 at 3:28 pm
It sounds like you did stand up for a brave but dignified way. What a beautiful article. Thanks for sharing it with us.
MissEmilyDickinson This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Sept. 25, 2014 at 5:06 pm
This is amazing. I don't don't know when this was published, but congrats on having this published. You deserve it. You really have a talent and greatness in you. You are a amazing and wonderful and strong and barve person and writer. never give up, please. People shouldn't treat others like that; everyone deserves to be treated equally and with respect. Thank you so much, for sharing this. Thank you again. 
dmax108 said...
May 5, 2014 at 3:47 pm
i had a friend commit suicide for that  but she really was lesbian
dmax108 said...
May 5, 2014 at 3:45 pm
thank god for people like you your one of 1000 that understands  
dmax108 said...
May 5, 2014 at 3:44 pm
i had a friend commit suicide because people were making fun of her  except she was a lesbian look at my writing on my prophile  
2write said...
Mar. 20, 2014 at 5:40 am
Instead of spreading things like this,: ONCE YOU'VE STARTED READINGTHIS YOU CAN'T GET OUT! READ ON IF YOU DON'T WANT TO DIE A year ago A girl named Kathy was hated by everyone. Everyone made fun of her. She was ignored. Even by messages. One day she decided to kill herself. Beca......use..................... even her parents ignored her. She jumed out her window. No one noticed utill people started dissapearing. Kathy haunted them. She made them suffer like the way she did. S... (more »)
TheUnspoken1 said...
Nov. 22, 2013 at 10:40 am
This article, shows that most people don't like gays, bi, lesbians, or ect. You are who are. It shouldn't matter to anyone else who you like, or what you do with someone else. All that matters is, your doing it for you. Keep up the good work(:
TheUnspoken1 said...
Nov. 21, 2013 at 12:07 pm
I think you shouldn't be bullied at all. I mean everyone is different. Whether your bi, gay, lesbian, transvestite. It shouldn't matter. We're all the same. No one has the right to judge to judge anyone. I think you should honestly take a stand for yourself more often, because people like that are the reason teens kill themselves. I think this was a great article. ♥ Keep it up!
maddog173 said...
Sept. 13, 2013 at 8:09 pm
awesome story it really speaks to me 
KiraVogt2896 said...
Apr. 9, 2013 at 8:27 pm
I loved this story or true expeirence! I wish you the best! :) xxoo
JettaWintryThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Apr. 9, 2013 at 7:21 pm
Fantastic job. I really loved this! It actually showed a real-life, down-to-earth story of a true experience or story. Great job. You made it seem so real, which it was, but you conveyed the realness well... I guess I'm trying to say that a lot of people make it seem like it's NOT real, and you did. So good job. (:
Parthenas said...
Apr. 7, 2013 at 11:39 am
I'm very lucky. My school is very liberal. We have a very large Gay-Straight alliance. Neither the faculty or the students there have tolerance for bullies.
HAILO said...
Mar. 14, 2013 at 2:44 pm
I know the feeling.  I'm constantly picked on ofr being bi.
HAILO replied...
Mar. 14, 2013 at 2:44 pm
GlassesGirl721 said...
Aug. 9, 2012 at 8:16 am
Great job! That guy was a real jerk but you did the right thing.
skyaroundtheworld said...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:59 pm
 This is wonderful! Thank you for writing about this.
shamrocker88 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Dec. 8, 2011 at 12:57 pm
Hey no problem! And thank you for your comment! :)
Thesilentraven This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 25, 2010 at 10:58 am
I'm so sorry that this happened to you. I think the sad fact is: there are just a lot of jerks in the world. The best you can do is not let them get to you. I'm glad you learned from your experience, though.
shamrocker88 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jul. 25, 2010 at 11:37 pm
Yes, luckily I never let that sort of thing happen to me again! Thanks for your understanding!
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