Innocence | Teen Ink

Innocence

June 4, 2010
By roxymutt BRONZE, Marietta, Georgia
roxymutt BRONZE, Marietta, Georgia
4 articles 5 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see. -David Henry Thoreau


My innocence was taken at the age of twelve. I still have nightmares about that night. I can smell his breath, mint and cherries; I see his face, leaning in, his eyes searching for some glimmer that I might want this as much as him; I hear his ragged voice telling me “shh…it’s all going to be ok…only a few minutes…that’s all I’m asking for.” My heart is racing. I know exactly what is happening yet I cannot stop him. He’s bigger, stronger, more desperate then I had ever been. He tells me he will be gentle if I don’t cry out. Even if I had something to say, my dry mouth would not permit me uttering a single word. It was dark and I couldn’t quite make out his face, but those eyes…something familier. He slipped his hands underneath my shirt. I cringed away but he held my arms fast and steady. He undid my clasp. Everything was slipping away under his touch. I was sweating, but I grew cold as the seconds passed. The cold air chilled me to the bone. He threw off my shoes and socks. Nothing seemed to stop his hurried, determined persistence. I stiffened as he dropped each garment into a pile of my clothing next to us. He stroked my cheek in what he must have thought was a soothing manner, tipped my head back and began to kiss my neck.


He left me lying there. He did not bother to re-cloth me, not that it really mattered. I had gone numb to the cold ground, numb to the entirety of my surroundings. My body felt as if it no longer belonged to me. I looked at my fingers. They moved. Was I doing that or was it of their own accord? No matter. Me, or what was left of me, dragged its aching limbs up into a standing position. The clothes next to me were soiled. I was no longer the girl who had worn them minutes before. I looked around once more, remembering the pain, the anger, the sorrow this place had just inflicted upon me.


I walked back to my brother’s car. He must be off with some of his friends. Thankfully, his keys were left in the ignition. It was unlike him to be quite so careless. I stood there staring at the car. Was I worthy of trying to step back into my old place of being? A large bolt of lightning made the decision for me and I slowly made my way into the passenger seat. There was a blanket in the back seat and I swaddled my aching body into its soft folds. Sleep over came me and the next thing I remember was Jonah throwing open his car door with a burst of laughter from his friends. He glanced at me in the backseat nervously, probably thinking I was still asleep. He said his goodbyes, which usually consisted of a lot of back smacking, knuckle punches, and finally inched his way into the driver ’s seat.


As his car pulled away from the curb, I sat up and looked at him. In the rear - view mirror, all I could make out were his eyes.


“Jonah. I know it was you.”



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This article has 43 comments.


on May. 22 2012 at 1:40 pm
forevermore147, Godley, Texas
0 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
Always remember you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, smarter than you think and twice as beautiful as you'd ever imagined.
- Patti Rooks

 you are my new favorite author

 


on Feb. 14 2012 at 10:08 am
kimberdawn SILVER, Sedalia, Missouri
7 articles 0 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
The sun, with all these planets revolving around it and dependent upon it, can still ripen a bunch of grapes as if it has nothing else in the universe to do.









~Galileo

Holy Cow!!! Thats...WOW!!! I love how mysterious you make this. I would have never expected this ending. You are fantastic!!! WOW!!!

on Oct. 15 2011 at 9:20 pm
roxymutt BRONZE, Marietta, Georgia
4 articles 5 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see. -David Henry Thoreau

thank you so much! im so sorry it took so long for me to respond!!! i appreciate your comment greatly though

on Jul. 31 2011 at 3:28 am
IAmWhoIWantToBe PLATINUM, Manila, Other
41 articles 0 photos 650 comments

Favorite Quote:
‎"I’m learning how to drown out the constant noise that is such an inseparable part of my life. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone. I only have to follow my heart and concentrate on what I want to say to the world: I run my world." - Beyoncé

This is abso bloody lutely fantastico!!!

on May. 5 2011 at 8:38 pm
Stpaulian BRONZE, Kewadin, Michigan
2 articles 0 photos 36 comments

Favorite Quote:
Bad Spellers of the world 'untie'.

Amazing. Just amazing. Other stories like this are heart breaking, but don't have that shock quality at the end. Don't stop this was really stop and I hope theres more coming.

AlyxL said...
on Oct. 28 2010 at 11:16 am
AlyxL, Cleveland, Texas
0 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
"So neglect becomes our ally."




-Count de Monte Cristo

Holy, wow. That was just wow. I'm reading this while in history class and my mouth literally dropped open at the ending. My teacher looked at me oddly and asked what was wrong. I told her nothing and quickly switched tabs on the laptop. That was seriously wow. I like the twist. Well, not like I like it like like it. It's just a good twist that I haven't really seen so it was very unexpected. :)   I agree with some of the other commenters, you should do a follow up story or something. Even short it'll be good. Like the awkward carride home or something like that. Anyways, I'm rambling. ><

GaelicC said...
on Oct. 25 2010 at 9:08 am
GaelicC, Longford, Other
0 articles 0 photos 91 comments

Favorite Quote:
No -Rosa Parks

SCARY!! That was fantastic but petrifying!(I probably speit that wrong but who cares) this is class, keep writing i can't wait to hear more!!!

Aginger GOLD said...
on Oct. 10 2010 at 12:36 am
Aginger GOLD, Bingen, Washington
11 articles 0 photos 46 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Why are you so busy trying to fit in when you were born to stand out?"

This is horrifying! It was terrible yet so good! The twist at the end was great, yet it completely chills me. Nice work

Katrselyn said...
on Oct. 1 2010 at 5:34 pm
Katrselyn, Kankakee, Illinois
0 articles 0 photos 142 comments
omg! own brother?! gross but amazing story!

LASwan SILVER said...
on Sep. 26 2010 at 7:24 pm
LASwan SILVER, Yukon, Oklahoma
5 articles 0 photos 55 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't worry about the world endng today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
-Charles Schultz

Wow. This is terrifying. You could really address some issues and move mountains with your talent. Keep it up.

on Aug. 30 2010 at 10:39 am
writergirl13 GOLD, Cherry Hill, New Jersey
11 articles 8 photos 261 comments

Favorite Quote:
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
Ambrose Bierce

I do hope, though, that this was not written from personal experience. that would be simply a horrible memory!

on Aug. 30 2010 at 10:38 am
writergirl13 GOLD, Cherry Hill, New Jersey
11 articles 8 photos 261 comments

Favorite Quote:
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
Ambrose Bierce

I agree completely, especially with how you said that stories like this often have very strong, captivating beginnings but weak ends,  but this definitely had a strong beginning and a strong end that leaves the reader wanting more. 

on Aug. 11 2010 at 5:21 pm
The_Squirrel GOLD, Port Alberni, Other
15 articles 0 photos 36 comments

Favorite Quote:
I will because I can, I can because I want to, I want to becasue you said I couldn't.

I'm actually sorta confused but that's okay. It was amazing anyways.

xkristinx GOLD said...
on Aug. 3 2010 at 4:41 pm
xkristinx GOLD, Fairfield, Connecticut
15 articles 0 photos 9 comments
This was so so so so so so so good. i loved every moment of it. Usually stories like this have a great beggining, but a weak end. and cant keep a persons interest. but yours was the complete opicite. it was just bone chilling. i love it so much. its just amazing.<33

on Jul. 28 2010 at 11:18 pm
iluvuiluvunot, Tacoma, Washington
0 articles 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us."Ect....
-Marianne Williamson

Wow, This Is Amazing ! God It Hurt Me To Read This Because the Pain She Felt, Like Her Body Was Taken; Stolen. Keep Writting, I Really Love This Piece Alot(: ! I Wonder If She's Gonna Use This Abuse To Treat Herself Postively Or Not. Keep Thism Up Pleease !

-Jaiden(:  A.K.A. iluvuiluvunot


on Jul. 27 2010 at 10:21 am
inksplatters21 SILVER, Mason, Ohio
6 articles 0 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Character is how you live when no one is watching."

This piece was awesome...i'm sure a lot of girls will appreciate this.  Please read/comment my work, thanks!

on Jul. 8 2010 at 8:08 pm
OfficialApprover PLATINUM, Orefield, Pennsylvania
48 articles 0 photos 1754 comments

Favorite Quote:
Grab life by the balls. -Slobberknocker
We cannot change the cards we're dealt just how we play the hand
Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted
It's pretty easy to be smart when you're parroting smart people
-Randy Pausch

This.  Was.  Amazing.  There is scarcely anything else to say.  So realistic and revolting, which I assume was the desired effect.  It was extremely well-written and grabbing.  The last part just blew me away.  Wow.  You're incredible!

on Jul. 6 2010 at 10:06 pm
roxymutt BRONZE, Marietta, Georgia
4 articles 5 photos 110 comments

Favorite Quote:
It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see. -David Henry Thoreau

ha oh thankyou so much taht means a TON to me!!! :DDD i am so glad you liked it

on Jul. 6 2010 at 4:39 pm
DannyKid33 PLATINUM, Pleasant Hill, California
34 articles 2 photos 81 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't ever let the media tell you what to look like. You're beautiful the way you are. Stay beautiful, keep it ugly." - Gerard Way.

oh. my. gosh. this was...AMAZING! i cannot get over this piece. i did not expect the ending at all and it really was shocking-thats what made it so good :) ur writing style is great and creative. i love this article so much!! never stop writing :)

EmmaNemma GOLD said...
on Jun. 30 2010 at 8:32 am
EmmaNemma GOLD, The Shire, Vermont
10 articles 0 photos 43 comments

Favorite Quote:
If you think you are a hypochondriac by definition aren't you?

This was really good. You made it seem as though I was actually the one remembering it. I especially like the last line. I never saw it coming and it was the best ending you could have thought of.


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