I found myself making a choice that would decide how the rest of my entire life went. I could either give myself a safe and secure future or allow someone to have a future. A decision that would shape me into a person who was either selfish or full of integrity.
One week earlier, my day started off with a completely typical Saturday morning. I sprung up from my bed, performing my usual routine. I pulled my long blonde hair into a ponytail, changed into my neon, fluorescent blue running clothes, laced up my Nike sneakers and left for my six mile run. As I was jogging, I could hear the gentle breeze coming from Lake Norman whistle through my ears. The sunrise was peering out from under the clouds, surrounded by beautiful purples and oranges, ready to rise. I thought about how in just five days, I would be running in my last high school race, that would be attended by college cross country scouts. It would be the most important race of my life, since I had to impress them in order to get into a good college, since my grades were lacking.
I smiled at my neighbors as I turned into my driveway. Entering my house, I heard the phone ring.
“Hello. Is a Tessa Adams there?” questioned the voice.
“Yes, that’s me” “Who is this?” I replied.
“This is Stacy from the Carolinas Medical Center. My paperwork says here that you have agreed to donate your kidney, if the opportunity came up. That’s why I’m calling you today.” she stated.               My mouth opened. I completely forgot that I had checked off that box. But then I realized I would never donate my kidney to someone I don’t even know. I have an entire running career ahead of me and cannot jeopardize that.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t. I’m an athlete and I have a crucial race coming up.” I replied.
“Are you sure? This man will die if we don’t do the surgery soon and your kidney is the only one in our databases that is a match to the man.” She begged me.
I hung up. There is no way I could donate my kidney to whoever the man is. I have a future in cross country ahead of me and my last high school race in just a few days.
My day continued normally until that night. I had a dream of the man who needed the kidney transplant’s ghost taunting me for being selfish and keeping my second kidney when I don’t even need it. I suddenly woke up and shot up in my bed. I was sweating and shaking like a marathon runner after they finish running.
Was I being selfish? I was just trying to allow myself to have a successful running career so I could get into a decent college. But, because of my decision, the man would end up dead. I decided to call the nurse the next day to see if I could run my race and after, donate my kidney.
I dialed the hospital’s phone number into my phone the next morning when I woke up.
“Hello, Stacy? This is Tessa Adams. We talked yesterday about a possible kidney transplant?” I spoke into the phone.
“Yes! This is Stacy. Did you change your mind about the transplant?” she requested.
“Sort of. I was wondering if there was any way I could run my race at 5 PM, and then come in and do the transplant?” I questioned hopefully.
“Hmm..let me check our schedule for the surgery.” She stated.
“Okay! Thank you!” I exclaimed.
“Tessa, I’m afraid that the surgery is booked for 4 PM, so you wouldn’t get here in time after the race. Our surgeon is only available on that day and time. I’ll mail the paperwork for the kidney transplant to your house, just in case. ” She noted.
“Oh. Okay. I’ll think about still doing the surgery…Thank you, bye.”
I hung up the phone, frustrated on how this all turned out. I couldn’t win either way. On one hand, I could do the surgery. But then, I won’t be able to do what I love more than anything anymore and I won’t get in to a good college. The thought of never being able to run again frightened me more than anything. All my hard work from the last four years of running Varsity Cross Country, Indoor Track and Outdoor Track would be thrown away like an old, useless rag. I could never experience the feeling of being the first person to cross the finish line in a race again. Although, I would be saving someone’s life and it would be the moral thing to do. I could save a family from losing someone they care about greatly.
On the other hand, I can go to my race and not do the surgery. I would be recruited to go to an excellent college and be able to do what I love every day. But, I would have to live with the torturing guilt that my actions led to someone’s death and that I could have saved them, but chose not to.
Three days passed and it was the day of my race I planned to run in. But also, the day the surgery was scheduled. I still had not made up my mind yet, torn between which decision was the right one.
With my running bag, packed with my sneakers and cross country uniform in one hand and the paperwork I filled out for the surgery in the other, I tossed them in the back of my car. I entered my car not knowing which one of them I was going to be using today. I buckled up and adjusted my mirror, staring into my torn blue eyes. I backed out of my driveway and just drove, not even knowing where I was headed.