On the edge of the Australian outback, where the endless miles of rural desert meets the wild green jungle, lived Wombat and Tarsier. Wombat lived inside a cave at the bottom of a steep cliff where the sun shined brightly every morning. Tarsier lived across the river at the base of an enormous baobab tree that never received any sunlight. Each morning when Wombat bid her house guests farewell after a long night of drinking cactus wine, she watched Tarsier scream at her departing friends as they walked through her lawn.
Tarsier hated animals. She had no friends because whenever an animal approached her, she would open her golf ball sized eyes big and wide and bite the legs of the curious mammals. Wombat, on the other hand, loved animals and approached others often to make new friends.
As Wombat slowly walked into her home, she remembered the scar on her hip that Tarsier gave her the last time she tried to invite Tarsier over. Suddenly, Wombat thought of a great idea to make Tarsier friendlier.
The next day, Wombat began to prepare a barbeque for Tarsier. She decided to cook cactus because she knew Tarsier loved grilled cactus (or nopales as Tarsier called them). Wombat always noticed Tarsier’s big eyes poke out from her windows whenever Wombat was grilling cactus.
When all of Wombat’s guests arrived--Kangaroo, Kookburrra, Spotted Cuscus, Koala, Bandicoot, Cassowarry, Bilby, Brolga, Yabby, Echidna, and Thylacine arrived--she started up her fire for grilling. Just as expected, Tarsier’s little nose became visible. Sniff Sniff Sniff. After noticing her catching a whiff of the cooking cactus, Wombat saw Tarsier’s protruding eyes stare at the cactus from across the lawn.
“Ohhhhhhhh, Tarsier,” Wombat called out.
“WHAT!!!!!” yelled Tarsier.
“Would you like to join us for some yummy nopales, and don’t say no because I know they’re your favoriiiiiiiiite,” Wombat sang.
“Oh yeah, and how would you know that, you fat sack of fur!” screamed Tarsier.
“Because whenever I grill cactus you always stick your creepy watermelon eyes out of your window and stare at me. You know that I can see those things from a mile away even if I try not to,” teased Wombat.
“Yeah, well I can see your gut from a hundred miles away and I’m sure nobody wants to see that,” Tarsier retorted, jumping from her window to her front lawn. She began to prance around her lawn, holding an imaginary beer belly in her hands.
“Awe, come on shrimp. Aren’t you cold down there in that big trunk of your tree? Come on over and warm yourself by the fire. Maybe then you’ll stop shivering so much and treating everybody like dirt.” Wombat cried.
“Oh alright, but you better warn your friends because cactus isn’t the only thing these canines like to bite through!”
With that, Tarsier thudded over to Wombat’s front yard, where everybody lay waiting. With every thud that Tarsier made, Wombat’s guests flinched, jumping up and down as if they were in the middle of an earthquake. Tarsier eyed every single mammal sitting on Wombat’s lawn, bracing herself to bite anybody that moved.
“Oh, Tarsier! You’re scaring my guests, just come take this seat by the fire already,” Wombat scowled.
“Watch it bub,” Tarsier poked Wombat’s bulbous belly, “I’m gracing you with my presence right now. Don’t make me bite your other hip.” Tarsier smacked her lips and sat down next to the warm fire located at the center of Wombat’s front patio. She fell silent. Wombat’s guests couldn’t believe their eyes. A smile began to grow on Tarsier’s face as she began to slowly close her eyes.
“Here you go, Tarsier.” Wombat said, as she handed her a plate full of steamy nopales. Everyone salivated at the smell of the perfectly cooked cactus coated in charred lime juice.
“Ohhhhh, thannnnnk you. This fire feels lovely,” sighed Tarsier, leaning back in her chair. All of Wombat’s guests were awe struck; Tarsier’s politeness took them by complete surprise. Wombat smugly smiled at her guests.
“How did you get her to calm down?” Kangaroo asked.
“Well, when you have a fire, use it to warm a cold heart” replied Wombat. Tarsier had never been exposed to so much warmth before--her tree trunk never got much sunshine. The cold of her home turned her heart into ice and it wasn’t until Wombat invited Tarsier over that her heart started to melt and become friendly. All Tarsier needed was a bit of warmth to thaw her cold heart.