Well this is awkward. My parents and I are sitting in the therapist’s office waiting for our session to start. We’re sitting on opposite sides of the room, and the tension in the air is so thick it could be cut with a knife. If it wasn’t for them and their need to control my life, I could be spending the last Saturdays of my senior year in high school hanging out with Katie and Alex, my best friends since first grade. Instead, I have to spend my Saturdays at therapy sessions with my parents while we discuss our “problems”.
This would be our third session and so far, we have made absolutely no progress. At least I’m making an effort. All they do during the sessions is talk about how I waste my time performing, that I could achieve so much more if I became a doctor or a lawyer. Yeah right. They just want me to become like them, overworking drones that never have time for anything except work. I don’t even remember the last time we spent any time together as a family.

These days, all I ever hear them talk about is how proud they are of Aaron, my brother. He’s graduating at the top of his class at Columbia University and is getting a full ride through medical school. He’s basically every parents dream. My parents make it seem like he’s perfect in every way. To me, he is still the same dorky brother that would jump up and down about a new Pokémon episode and trip over his own foot.

Even though he only lives 30 minutes away, I still only see him during the holidays. I’m positive part of the reason he’s stopped visiting during the weekends is because my parents and I are constantly arguing. There’s also the fact that every teenage girl in our area is practically in love with him. Although he’s my brother and find it nauseating, I can see why. He has big hazel eyes, short brown hair, is six feet tall and partially resembles Zac Efron.

Finally, the door opens and in walks Mr. Smith, the therapist. He has a scared look on his face and I don’t blame him, our last session was like the start of World War Three. “Okay, let’s get started” he says in a semi- shaky voice. For a family therapist, you would think he would be used to this kind of behavior but apparently, we’re too intense for him.
“I know that there is a lot of tension between you, but you need to stop shouting and sit down and actually start talking to each other.” I raise an eyebrow at him. Does he honestly think that my parents and I are capable of having a normal conversation? I mean come on; he’s been there for some of the arguments we’ve had. Reading my mind he continues on, “I know that you have never really had an actual conversation with each other, but for my sake and for everyone else that is in the building, at least try.” I can see that he is actually trying to help us, so I just send him a small smile and nod my head. My parents, on the other hand, look offended, but not wanting to start anything, just nod their heads.
“OK, when did you first start arguing?” I think back to my elementary school years. It takes me about five minutes before I answer. “It started in fourth grade after I had my piano recital…”
*Flashback*

Today’s the day of my piano recital and I could not be more of a wreck. “Would you stop worrying Nichole? You’re going to do a great job.” Katie says trying to reassure me. “Besides, even if you mess up, I’ll only make fun of you a little bit.” Alex teases playfully. That makes me crack the tiniest of smiles.
“Ha-ha, you’re probably the funniest person I know!” Katie exclaims. Alex smiles and is about to reply before she continues on with a smirk on her face “Well, funniest to look at anyway.” Alex sends a glare her way before making a comeback, “You know Katie; I always love spending time with you.” I’m surprised; he never says anything like that. Then he continues on, “You just make me look so much better in comparison.” I face palm, spoke too soon. Of course he would say that. They always bicker like this. They’re like Ron and Hermione from Harry Potter.
*6 hours later*

I can’t believe I played that well. I thought I would have a nervous breakdown. “You did great Nichole!” Katie and Alex say running up and hugging me. I smile; they are the best friends I could ask for. Then, my smile turns into a frown noticing two people missing. “Hey guys, where are my parents?” Aaron comes up next to me answers with slight irritation in his voice, “They said they had some work at home to catch up with.” I just sadly nod my head, I’m not surprised. Noticing my sadness Katie tries to cheer me up, “Come on Nichole. My parents and I will take you guys home.”
Aaron and I get home and see my parents in their office, doing loads of paperwork. I knock on their office door, signaling that I want to talk to them. “What do you need Nichole?” my dad asks. I carefully think of what to say in my head. I finally think of something to say, but I blurt out the complete opposite of what was planned, “Why weren’t you at the recital?” My parents both look up from their work. Oh shoot, why did I say that? “Our work is very important and, it puts a roof over your head.” I groan. Did they really just use that excuse on me? I’ve heard that more than enough times.
Before I can stop myself I reply back, “You basically work twenty-four hours every day. Can’t you just take an hour to stop working and go and see me perform? You know how important music is to me. I’ve wanted to play the piano since I was four years old! Tell me, would it really have been that hard?” Both of my parents have a look of shock on their faces before my mom says something. “Nichole Andrea Taylor. You know better than to talk to us like that. We were caught up with work and you need to accept the fact that we won’t be able come to everything you do.”
*End of Flashback*

I finish telling my story and there’s a silence in the room. It only lasts for so long before Mr. Smith says, “So Nichole that was when you think that you and your parents started to fight?” I just nod my head. My dad however says something, “You think we started to fight all because of that little argument?” I roll my eyes at how clueless my dad is. I’m about to retort, but knowing that whatever I say will lead to an argument, Mr. Smith cuts me off, “So Nichole, now that I have a small idea of what led you to constantly bicker, take a few moments to think of times where you felt your parents didn’t really care about you.” There are so many instances where that has happened; it’s hard to choose just only one. I end up choosing to talk about an instance that happened about two years ago in my sophomore year when I was 16.
*Flashback*

“Are you sure about this Katie?” I whisper to my best friend. Alex replies before she can say anything. “Yes, now go tune your guitar and practice.” He takes Katie’s hand. It’s pretty ironic how they ended up together actually. They were having one of their many bickering matches when all of a sudden Alex kisses her. She pulls back and I’m half expecting her to slap him across the face, but instead she just smiles and kisses him again catching both me and him off guard. To say I was shocked would be an understatement.

I’m trying to tune my guitar, but all I can think of is how disappointed my parents would be if they found out that I lied to them. I’m so out of it I don’t even notice Alex come up behind me and grab me. “Nichole, get it together. Stop worrying about what your parents are going to say and just go out there and do what you enjoy doing most in the world. Besides, even if they catch you, you were only playing in a café. I’m going to go to the front now but if you need anything just ask. Good Luck.” Wow I never knew he could give inspirational speeches like that, but he has a point. Even if they do catch me, it’s not like I was playing in a bar or a club. I’m just playing in a little café. What I’m wearing proves it to; black vans, light blue jeans, a white tank top with a cardigan over it and a black knit beret over my long chestnut colored hair.

I go out and perform a few covers of songs that I liked. I was only supposed to be background noise so that the café wouldn’t be too awkwardly quiet. But as time went on I noticed more and more people starting to watch me and by the last song, all eyes are on me. When I’m done, I look up to see that everyone is standing and clapping. I got so lost in the music I didn’t even realize that they gave me a standing ovation and to be honest, it feels great.

I notice that I only have 15 minutes to get home so I quickly pack my guitar up and Alex gives me a ride home. I get home just in time to find my parents sitting at the dining room table waiting for me. Oh no, that’s never a good sign. My dad confirms it when he asks, “So Nichole, how was studying? Although it must have been really hard considering the fact you left your notes at home and you weren’t at the library.” I look down to the ground silently cursing myself for my own mistake. I decide to just be honest with them.” I was hanging out with Katie and Alex.” Okay, so maybe it wasn’t the full truth, but it wasn’t a complete lie either.
“Nichole Taylor”, good they didn’t middle-name me, “Didn’t you say you had a history test on Monday? You should have been studying for that test instead of hanging out with your friends.” Wait, What? So let me get this straight. They were only mad because I didn’t study for a history test that is a PRACTICE test? Are you kidding me? They aren’t even mad about the fact that I lied right to their faces? I have no words to say that, but I manage to choke up two, “I’m sorry.”
*End of Flashback*

Right after I finish talking, the counselor pounces on me. “Yeah I am completely lost with how this how you think this makes you think your parents don’t care about you. From what I heard, it seems like they care about you.” I scoff; apparently it’s not just my parents that are completely clueless. “Well counselor, if you were paying attention you would see that they were more concerned about me passing a history test then they actually were about me-“ I’m about to continue on before the counselor cuts me off once again.

“Now I don’t think that they were more concerned over a test then you.” Oh my goodness; was he listening at all? At this point I am so frustrated with this guy it is taking all of my will power not to yell at him. Instead, I just explain in a calm, yet agitated voice. “They didn’t even care enough to give me a punishment for lying. They just told me to go to my room and study and that I better get 100 percent on the test. No lecture about how worried they were or about how lying like that could put me in danger in the future, but nope; nothing at all.” There was an awkward silence before my mom says something. “We didn’t punish you because we knew that you were responsible by admitting that you lied to us.” She says it so quietly I had to strain my ears to hear her. “Still would have been nice to show that you cared.” I bitterly reply back.

Sensing the tension rising, Mr. Smith asks me a new question. “Well we’ve heard how you think this all started. But what made you finally lose it?” All of our arguments have made me want to pull all of my hair out at some point, but it didn’t get unbearable until I turned 18 in December. At that point we were arguing everyday over the littlest things like what pizza topping we wanted. But what ticked me off the most wasn’t even an argument we had. At that point, their actions spoke louder than their words. “It was during winter break this past December. It was part of my 18th birthday present.”
*Flashback to December *

This is by far the best present my parents have ever given me. We’re taking a “family” vacation to California and so far it’s been an extraordinary experience. Even though my parents are on business calls over half of the time, Aaron and I have plenty of sights to see and I was even able to get a small gig playing at a café; something my parents were not too happy about.
*Next Day*
Even though it’s just a little performance, I’ve never actually sung in front of this many people before; play the piano, yes; sing, no. Throughout the years I have gained more confidence in my abilities, but that doesn’t mean I don’t get nervous from time to time. As if he knows what I’m thinking, Aaron comes backstage to give me a confidence boost. “You can do this Nichole. I know that you’ve never sung in front of this many people but trust me, you are an amazing singer. Now I’m going to go find a seat. Good luck!” As he’s walking off, I look at the crowd and I see my parents looking bored as ever. “Can’t they at least try to make it look like they are happy?” I mumble to no one in particular. All of a sudden a speaker comes on, “Now up next is Nichole Taylor!” When I walk onto the stage and look into the crowd again; I know I’m going to need that luck.
The performance went great. Everyone is congratulating me on how well I did and complimenting me on my voice, piano playing and the songs that I wrote. I’m so excited that I don’t notice someone tapping my shoulder. I finally realize it and turn around. Standing behind me is a tall male in his early 30’s with short black hair and brown eyes wearing semi-formal attire. He introduces himself first and what I hear is not what I am expecting. “Hello Nichole. I’m Ted Johnson, a producer for Capitol Records and I couldn’t help but be impressed by the amount of musical talent you have. If you ever want to work with me someday, give me a call and we will work something out.” He hands me a card and to speechless to really say anything I just say “Thank you.” He leaves and I look at my family. My brother’s face is filled with pride and joy. My parents, on the other hand look furious. They make their way over here and before I can say anything, my dad roughly grabs my shoulder and hisses in my ear, “We’ll discuss this later. Let’s go.”
*End of Flashback*

When I’m done telling my story, I’m met with complete silence. After about 30 seconds it starts to get pretty awkward. Finally, my dad decides to break the silence. “We just didn’t need to be there anymore. We already had to listen to you perform, why should we stay any longer than we have to?” Well that was a dumb question to ask.
I give a fake laugh and snap back, “I don’t know dad. Maybe it was the fact that he was giving me an opportunity to actually do something with my life. You know; something that could actually make me happy.” I can just sense a remark on how I should be a doctor or a lawyer coming up from him. “Well you could be successful by becoming a doctor or a lawyer.” Yep, I was right.
I am just tired of arguing with them at this point. I just have to get all of my frustrations out. “Oh okay, so you basically want me to become like you?” I take a small pause before I finally explode. “You are my PARENTS. Aren’t you supposed to support my dreams and not tear them down every chance you get? Do you remember what you said to me when we got back to our hotel? You said that you thought I did OK and that I wasn’t going to call that guy from the record label. You said that you weren’t going to let me do something as meaningless as performing and that after I graduate, I’m going to college to study to become a doctor or a lawyer just like we planned it. If I recall, I don’t ever remember planning studying to become a lawyer or a doctor. Almost all of my life, the only thing I wanted to do was to become a singer and you know that. I get the fact that you want me to succeed with my life, but isn’t me being happy more important?” At the beginning I was yelling but now, it’s barely above a whisper. I feel something wet drop on my sleeve, I didn’t even realize I started to cry.
Unfortunately, my parents have some of their own frustrations to get out. “There was a reason we missed so many of your concerts and recitals Nichole. It wasn’t always because we had work; although sometimes it was. Most of the time, it was because we would be reminded that you weren’t going to be the girl that we wanted and raised you to be.”
Wow, they missed almost all of my performances because I can’t be their perfect little girl? Hurt and angry, I wipe away my tears and shout at them. “That was why you missed my performances; because I can’t be the perfect daughter that you have planned inside your heads? Are you KIDDING ME?” They have looks of shock on their faces from me yelling at them. I lower down the volume and continue my rant. “Well I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I can’t be a dream child like Aaron and be interested in becoming a doctor or a lawyer. I’m sorry that my dreams don’t fit into your perfect little world you have planned out in your heads. I’m sorry that you didn’t get the perfect daughter that you so desperately wanted. But, I am not sorry that singing is something that I want to do for the rest of my life. I am not sorry that I’ve dreamed for so long. And I am not sorry for wanting to chase down that dream.” I take a deep breath and continue on in a calm, yet firm voice. “Now it’s your choice whether you are willing to accept it or not.” I give them a few moments to respond. It feels like hours before they do.
“Okay Nichole. Since we obviously can’t agree on something, we are going to give you two choices. You can stay with us, quit your dream of becoming a singer and still be a part of this family. Or, you can keep trying to live your dream that we all know will never happen and never be a part of this family again.” My jaw drops to the floor. Did my ears hear correctly? Did my dad really just give me an ultimatum? Did he really just threaten to disown me? Wow, didn’t see that coming.
I guess these past few years; they have never really cared about anything I did outside of school. They only ever asked what I got on tests and what my grades were. They never asked if I had a good day or if I needed help with anything. Never asked how my piano or guitar lessons were. They were too caught up in trying to turn me into the perfect daughter that they didn’t realize that in reality, they were driving me away from them.
I wish I could say that deciding took me longer than 2 minutes. But, it doesn’t. “You are my parents and I am always going to love you.” when they get smug smiles on their faces after I say that, I know I’m making the right decision. It’s also when my voice starts to break down. “But unless you can accept me and the choices I decide to make with my life, you no longer have a daughter.” With tears in my eyes, I pick up my purse and walk out the door leaving both my parents and the therapist stunned.
*3 months later in August*

I’m all packed and ready to go. The past few months, after I left my parent’s house, were pretty chaotic. After I left, I moved in with Katie and her parents were happy to take me in. They said that they thought of me as a second daughter. I’m proud to say that I graduated second in my class behind Katie. On graduation day, there were many tears, smiles and hugs. I thought I saw my parents somewhere in the stands next to Aaron, but I could have been hallucinating.

Aaron graduated from Columbia at the top of his class and is going to get his doctorate at Harvard Medical School. He and I visit each other often and he goes to see me sing as much as possible. And he still manages to trip over his own foot each time.

Katie and Alex are still together. Both of them are going to attend Duke University in the fall. They’ve been the best friends I could have asked for and I could not be more thankful for them. I think of our friendship of something like the golden trio from Harry Potter. No matter what we’re battling, what we’re going through or how many arguments we have; in the end, we’re always there for each other. I would be Harry and you guessed it; Alex and Katie would be Ron and Hermione.

After graduation, I called Mr. Johnson, from the record label, and said that I was interested in becoming a singer. After a little discussion, I became a signed artist.

Katie and Alex helped me pack everything up for my move to L.A; they didn’t have to, but they wanted to spend some time with me before I go to the airport. I honestly can’t believe that this is where I am at today in my life. It seems like just yesterday, I was touching the keys of a piano for the first time.

Everything is packed and ready to go. We load up all the furniture into the truck that’s going to meet me at my condo I got in L.A. This is where every defining moment so far in my life has happened. Pulling me out of my thoughts is Katie telling me we have to go or I’ll miss my flight. Before I get into the car, I look down the street and smile as I remember all the memories we’ve made here. After growing up my whole life here, I can honestly say that I’m going to miss this place.

The drive to the airport was terrible. It was filled with tears and I’m pretty sure that I have never cried more in my entire life. There was also the fact that we drove past the house I used to call home.

Even though I still don’t talk to my parents, that doesn’t mean I don’t love them. They’re my parents and they took care of me until I was old enough to do it on my own. Yes, they weren’t the most attentive parents and sure they can be a bit demanding but it’s because they care. When giving me that ultimatum, I realize that they were trying to do what they thought was best for me; that they were only trying to look out for me. I understand that now. I’ve tried calling them, but each time it goes to voicemail. I hope that I will actually get to talk to them again someday but for right now, I will live with hearing how they are doing from my brother.

Before I know it, we reach the airport. I hug Katie and Alex for the last time, at least for a little while. I don’t even realize when the waterworks start. Saying goodbye to them is one of the hardest things I have to do. Katie, who is crying, says, “You’re going to do great. I know it. Remember to call us when your album goes platinum.” From his red eyes that keep getting slightly puffier each second, I can tell Alex is trying not to cry in public. But he pulls me into a big hug and says, “Make us proud Nichole.” After a final hug goodbye, they leave and I’m left standing at the terminal. My flight number is called and with the words Alex last said to me ringing in my mind, I whisper one last thing before I board the plane. “Don’t worry, I will.”