Daddy's Womb | Teen Ink

Daddy's Womb MAG

April 23, 2008
By Anonymous

i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.



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This article has 2181 comments.


on Jan. 12 2012 at 10:13 pm
marisol21 BRONZE, Santa Clara, California
2 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
"Rise and Rise, until Lambs become Lions." - Robin Hood

This is great. I like the title. You should read mine.

on Jan. 12 2012 at 9:22 am
necrophilikat PLATINUM, Greshamville, Georgia
21 articles 0 photos 12 comments
I loved it.

jusc44 BRONZE said...
on Jan. 11 2012 at 11:45 am
jusc44 BRONZE, Ankeny, Iowa
3 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
you only have one life, live it

This is amazing! Check out my Poem " Our Love" Thanks(:

on Jan. 9 2012 at 7:09 pm
DooRonRon SILVER, Barstow, California
5 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
If life hands you lemons, squirt juice in the enemy's eye!
"Dying would be an awful big adventure."- Peter Pan

Whether you are a "published" poet or not, it is irrelevant. Poetry is a matter of raw emotion coming from the soul. It doesn't matter if one thousand of your poems have been published in magazines before, who are you to state if his poem is good or not. Poetry comes in every shape and form, just because it happens to not be in your favor does not mean it is bad. (Your opinion is taken in to account but it is your opinion of, "This is not good poetry" that isn't.)

laverne BRONZE said...
on Jan. 9 2012 at 2:25 pm
laverne BRONZE, Chicago, Illinois
4 articles 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
"dream's is only within the view of the catcher"

that was great..! i would love for you to read mine.

Snow Blossom said...
on Jan. 8 2012 at 9:43 pm
This poem is awful. It is not creative at all. Lots of kids write about their parents stifling them. "People who say its not good and don't know the meaning of poetry" is a matter of opinion. My opinion:I don't like this poem. And for the record, I am a published poet in this magazine as well as other magazines and in a book. This is not good poetry.

on Jan. 7 2012 at 10:25 pm
Zoe-22-Turner DIAMOND, Beverly, Massachusetts
99 articles 33 photos 91 comments
hey anyone know how to find more works by this person if he has a poem like this im sure if he has others they must be pretty awsome too

on Jan. 7 2012 at 3:04 pm
Mimi15 PLATINUM, Belfast, Maine
49 articles 0 photos 73 comments
Check out my poem 'On our Own'

on Jan. 6 2012 at 11:45 pm
expressionconfession GOLD, Cooper City, Florida
16 articles 0 photos 7 comments
lol. seriously? if you want to criticize someone on their writing craft, try mastering subject-verb agreement first. obviously men don't have wombs, the title was deliberate and made the poem a thousand times better. it's called symbolism brosky. check it out on sparknotes ;)

on Jan. 6 2012 at 11:42 pm
expressionconfession GOLD, Cooper City, Florida
16 articles 0 photos 7 comments
like the title, love the construction of the metaphor. all awesome! however i'd caution you to watch your rhyme scheme... if you read this out loud to yourself you will feel that some lines seem to short/long and a few easy word changes would smooth the flow

Luna557 SILVER said...
on Jan. 6 2012 at 8:46 pm
Luna557 SILVER, Wheaton, Illinois
6 articles 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
for springtime is lovetime and viva sweet love -e.e.cummings

See, i disagree about the punctuation comment, in a free verse poem you can do whatever you wish with the punctuation. Just look at e. e. cummings :)

on Jan. 3 2012 at 7:20 pm
scribbles2000, Lawrence, New York
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
this is incredible! well done

on Jan. 2 2012 at 11:15 pm
HaagenDazzle BRONZE, Fargo, North Dakota
1 article 36 photos 52 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The mother art is architecture. Without an architecture of our own, we have no soul of our own civilization." Frank Lloyd Wright

Lovely poem! I agree with the meaning of the title and how it ties into the essence of a father's love (that's what I view from your piece) Keep up the great work!

on Jan. 2 2012 at 5:05 pm
Elismylove BRONZE, Columbia, South Carolina
1 article 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
lies may make a few things easier but once you do it to the wrong person it makes thing so much harder.

This is beautiful ! I think this is a well thoughted and was put out very well .. Im very impressed !! :D

on Jan. 2 2012 at 9:05 am
Erebus_Wildfire BRONZE, Sandston, Virginia
2 articles 4 photos 4 comments
I agree and what explain the meaning of the title

on Jan. 2 2012 at 9:04 am
Erebus_Wildfire BRONZE, Sandston, Virginia
2 articles 4 photos 4 comments
this piece is good the structure of it is not bad and even when giving a regular post you should always be sure have punctuation

on Jan. 2 2012 at 12:31 am
justcoker BRONZE, Hyattsville, Maryland
3 articles 1 photo 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
The future belongs to the few of us still willing to get our hands dirty

That is sort of the irony to it. when the mom is supposed to be the protective on, it's the dad

on Jan. 1 2012 at 8:01 pm
shmam7624 SILVER, Evansville, Wisconsin
6 articles 0 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
We must become the change we want to see
-Mahatma Gandhi

Love it! I keep reading it over and over again.

on Jan. 1 2012 at 9:13 am
TawnyNerd1995 SILVER, Unit 15584, Other
6 articles 1 photo 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Words are just emotion, cut into little pieces." -ECW

paints a wonderful picture.

vazenitran98 said...
on Dec. 28 2011 at 11:03 am
vazenitran98, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
0 articles 0 photos 79 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I had the blues because I had no shoes until upon the street,I met a man who had no feet."

Amazing. You are very talented.