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Daddy's Womb This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

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i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.




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Art_Trash said...
Dec. 18, 2011 at 8:49 pm
In a nutshell, an overprotective dad
 
CoolPapaJames said...
Dec. 18, 2011 at 11:09 am
Great poem! Check out my page and read my poetry, if you like please comment and/ or rate. I would really appreciate it :)
 
rescuetruck607 said...
Dec. 17, 2011 at 9:06 pm
what a great poem keep up the good work!
 
ALR107 said...
Dec. 16, 2011 at 6:35 pm
That is a great poem! Unique title...
 
missingxD said...
Dec. 16, 2011 at 12:11 pm
its nice but i dont get it. whats it about?
 
Villangel said...
Dec. 16, 2011 at 11:24 am
Every time I read this, I fall in love with it again.! Great poem.! 
 
A_Voice_Made_to_Be_Heard said...
Dec. 15, 2011 at 8:28 pm
This was so touching. I love how you conveyed a serious message with a hopeful sounding and slightly upbeat voice. There's a naturall flow to the words too.
 
aaron13 said...
Dec. 14, 2011 at 10:06 am
thats a very touching poem
 
Leyna1997 said...
Dec. 13, 2011 at 8:03 pm
Well I clicked on your link and tried to see your stuff but couldn't. and im not trying to make a fight I'm just stating facts.
 
otherpoet said...
Dec. 11, 2011 at 6:45 pm
I think this poem is wonderful. I agree with KatieAtkinson's interpretation. Your poem had a very serious meaning, but as i read it i felt the tempo was rather up-beat
 
subliminal96 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 11, 2011 at 4:25 pm
Love this- I can feel the chain tightening as I type
 
AaishaBhuiyan said...
Dec. 11, 2011 at 12:50 am
amazingly worded :)
 
KatieAtkinson said...
Dec. 8, 2011 at 7:08 pm
Well, I really like this.  There is a point and I get it.  Everyone interprets poems differently, however.  For me, this piece is saying that the father keeps putting the son down, pulling him back when the son becomes to eager or hopeful, which explains the chain.  This was executed very nicely.  Good job.
 
FK92495 said...
Dec. 8, 2011 at 2:59 pm
This is a really good artical... it's really touching to me... it kinda speaks to me... :) i love it!!!
 
SaraSmiles said...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 5:25 pm
I know he had a purpose for his title and his poem doesn't 'suck' at all. It's great and it would be really appreciated if you could give constructive criticism vs. Being rude.
 
kyrie2015 said...
Dec. 7, 2011 at 1:15 pm
well duh you cant fly.!
 
VivaciousVirgoVixen said...
Dec. 5, 2011 at 3:27 am
Its a very heart-touching piece of work... I love it! <3
 
josika said...
Dec. 4, 2011 at 8:55 am
wow! this is really good! but i did not get the last para
 
babyraccoon said...
Dec. 2, 2011 at 3:06 pm
hey i really like this and its reallt thoughtful :)
 
EternallyMe03 said...
Dec. 2, 2011 at 8:50 am
This is an amazing poem, however you wish to read it.  You created a beautiful way to get your message across!
 
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