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Daddy's Womb This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

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i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.




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alonebutstillsurvivingThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Sep. 22 at 10:46 am:
i can sooo relate...
 
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DLove said...
Sep. 12 at 9:32 am:
This is very touching, and I love the emotion
 
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Chloe99This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Sep. 11 at 4:27 pm:
Really good, could you please take a look at my poems and leave a coment.
 
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GoatGreen said...
Sep. 10 at 1:16 pm:
not bad at all
 
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Fifi137 said...
Aug. 31 at 11:53 am:
Wow, you should write more like this
 
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wildsThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Aug. 30 at 11:18 am:
that is really good. can you see my poems and tell me if they are good? write more
 
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SonaliTWThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Aug. 23 at 1:18 pm:
Nice poem I'm new here please check out my work please
 
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Dbzfan836 said...
Aug. 20 at 7:30 pm:
This is genuine writing, sir! I am never going to let you stop, I will motivate you to the end.
 
Mario94This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 22 at 12:48 am :
Riveting work!!
 
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LonglegsThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Aug. 8 at 6:36 pm:
The ending is suprising and slightly funny. Overall its a great poem! I really enjoyed. Keep writing.
 
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Astro-slothThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jul. 16 at 6:58 pm:
Although I understand that this poem is supposed to be childish in nature; I find the complete lack of grammar makes it difficult to read.
 
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TheraforeverThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jul. 11 at 3:31 pm:
I love this poem and will most likley read it perpetually till its words have no meaning. It is a phonmenal peice and tells a story with just the right amount of words and details. Never stop writing! :) - Thera
 
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VanMartinThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jul. 5 at 10:29 pm:
Great poem. do you think you could check out my poems too? TeenInk.com/search.php?smodel=all&sall_uid=267391
 
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KylieKylieMarieThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jul. 4 at 12:03 pm:
This poem is absolutly beautiful. I love it.
 
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dani000.campThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jul. 4 at 1:20 am:
Emotional, drastic, innocent yet bold all at once. This is beautiful. I have so much more that I could say about it but I don't want to ruin something this masterful with my clunky words. I love this poem.
 
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taymmarieThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jul. 2 at 1:59 pm:
This is beautiful poem. The tone shifts are so drastic, and it really intensifies the meaning of the poem. You are very talented! 
 
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MindDrifter said...
Jun. 18 at 1:29 pm:
I love this poem. Best one i've read around here.
 
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Roseate This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jun. 16 at 2:47 pm:
Love the twist at the end. I noticed how the "I" wasn't capitalized, but other words like "sea" and "father" were. I love that it symbolizes how the father and life (the "sea") are bigger than the speaker and so are able to bind the speaker to the ground/reality. Profound and concise. Love it!
 
JupiterTheJedi replied...
Jun. 16 at 11:32 pm :
I never thought about it that way before! I'm glad you mentioned that. A certain style of the way this is written makes it seem like this was written by a small child. (The i's make it seem more childlike, too.)
 
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