Lavender Ice | Teen Ink

Lavender Ice

August 7, 2011
By AlexiaRenee BRONZE, None of your buisness, Nebraska
AlexiaRenee BRONZE, None Of Your Buisness, Nebraska
2 articles 2 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"After every storm comes a rainbow."


Summary:

Aya, an ice planet. Where only hair of the deepest shades of lavender hair are royalty. Where things of earth's past are their present. Where rules are strict, and being a princess is not so easy.

Born into the royal family, Aiyana, the seventh princess of Aya is faced with many challenges a fifteen year old girl should not have to face. Challenges of being forced into marraige by her father. The challenge that many laws are out dated and should not exsist. And of course who can forget that she is the seventh Princess which was to bring end to the Ayan race as told by an ancient Prophet? Of course, Aiyana, being second born, has no power over her future nor the future of her planet. What is a girl to do?


Alexia Renee K.

Lavender Ice


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This book has 4 comments.


on Mar. 15 2012 at 2:05 pm
just-another-url GOLD, Cannes, Other
16 articles 6 photos 151 comments

Favorite Quote:
"It's a good thing to be strange. Normalness leads to sadness." -Philip Lester

I really love your story ! Please write more soon, I want to know what Berkley's angle is ! And I agree with Immortal1290 and CarrieAnn13, your dialogues need some work but other why's the plot it great.

Could you please check out my book, The Forgotten ? Thanks :) 


potatohead said...
on Aug. 11 2011 at 3:32 pm
potatohead, Kentucky, Louisiana
0 articles 0 photos 13 comments
This plot idea is very creative; you definitely put a spin on the cliche. Also, I liked the setting and the characters. A little more description would improve the story; I really want to know more about the planet. Also, you might want to rework the dialogue because it IS just a little bit stiff.

on Aug. 10 2011 at 11:00 pm
AlexiaRenee BRONZE, None Of Your Buisness, Nebraska
2 articles 2 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
"After every storm comes a rainbow."

Okay! Thanks for the advice Ill use it!

on Aug. 10 2011 at 10:52 pm
CarrieAnn13 GOLD, Goodsoil, Other
12 articles 10 photos 1646 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." --Douglas Adams

"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane." --Marcus Aurelius

Okay, this is a good start to your novel, but I have some criticisms:

1.  This is kind of cliched.  A princess must unwillingly wed a man much older than her.  I've definitely heard that before.

2.  Work on your dialogue.  Even for royals, it's a bit stiff.

3.  You could add a bit more description; the world your story is set in sounds interesting.  I'd like to read more about it!