I'm gonna tell how a miserable life would be like. We, most of us, have lived those moments where we cannot breathe, the tears in our eyes, a lot of fears to fight, secrets to keep and promises to make. It's all a heavy thing, right? It's like a struggle that stops you from living the way you’ve always wished.

There's always like a black hole in our hearts and a dark space full of facts, lies, dreams and hopes. It's all in our minds and it always has been. No one, ever, would actually feel the same way we do or know what's in our minds and how things really are.

We won, sometimes, and we lost too. That's life. Well, it's fair enough. I know that you have a lot of things to do, a lot of people to care about. You feel like it all depends on you, it's your responsibility while you're the eldest. Or you're the one who might have the solution to make things work. I’m pretty sure that no one would imagine how hard the things are. There are people that might be living the same situation or worst but they’re not us. We’re different and that’s what makes each one of us unique.

I know that there’s that thing that, from time to time, makes you breathe harder. It’s like there’s something stucked within you. You want to say a lot but you just keep saving things for yourself, you don’t want to share anything anymore. In fact, you do that because you know that no one would really care and they’re just going to act like they’re supporting you; using those sweet words or hugs and stuff.
Maybe someone would stop me here and maybe say: “Well, there’s family and there are friends.”; but I’m gonna ask you a question: What is a family? What is a friend? Don’t you think that the human being created such concepts to kill his loneliness, to find some help and maybe someone to depend on? I’m not gonna lie to you, I’m just like you. I hate being alone but I’m used on that, I can spend like 72 hours without talking to someone. I, too, have feelings and am not a machine. You might be wondering why am I saying such things if I’m just like you, right? Well, I’m just looking for an answer that would justify many things, you or I has lived.

Now,  just imagine that you lost someone that you really love, your dad for example died. I’m sure that you’ll miss entering your home and finding that guy to whom you used to tell how your joureny was. You’ll miss hearing his voice, calling you to bring him something or doing him a favor. You’ll miss those days where he, wishes you the best before you’re leaving and asks if there’s something wrong. You’re gonna surely miss that guy who really cares about you. So, wouldn’t  you regret that you haven’t spent much time with him as it should have acutally happened if things were in the right place at the right time? Maybe because you were busy doing other things like watching movies or hanging out with your friends, chatting and maybe studying a lot?

I’m saying this not because I want to make you feel bad about something you’ve done or maybe to remind you of someone. No, it’s just because you, people, -including me-  keep wasting time doing s***, preventing ourselves from doing what we really need to do. Come on! You want to scream? go ahead, go out or go to the rooftop and scream yelling his name or whatever is stucked within you. It really helps, I often do that. Talk to yourself, God is listening and maybe a good soul around is listening too and just don’t care about how many times you felt alone even if there are people around.

Now and that you might have gotten what I said about that no one would really care and all what you’re gonna get from people is some good words trying to make you feel better because no one, ever, will know how does it really suck and feels like having no dad, even if some are in the same situtation but it just won’t be the same.

So, just imagine a life without someone you truely loved, maybe he died or he just left you in the middle of nowhere or he’s with someone else enjoying life.  Well, that’s how a miserable life would be like.