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As I lie here, the rain patters against the freezing, secure window. The smell of coffee and fresh spring flowers enters the room. I have a visitor. He is speaking to me in an intense, monotone, low voice. Speaking words I should of learnt how to understand. I block the rest out. The comfort talk. I don't need it. I am strong, or am I?
I was on my way home from school.Rushing to get home because the wind started to pick up. The noise of miserable, old lolly pop men and small, puny screaming children filled the streets. I reached my front door before the rain came down, like cats and dogs. Lucky right.
Wrong. What was said to me next, was the most life ruining news. It hit me like a bullet straight through the middle of my heart.
"Mum, where are you? Mum"
"I am here lovely" she said in a hoarse, incapable voice.
"Mum, you would never believe wha-"
"Sit down babe"
Mum was sitting at the table my Nan gave to us when we moved into our new house.
"Listen Liv, I need to tell you something very hard now, I have..." Mum took a hard, deep swallow of air "cancer."
I didn't know what too say. I mean my mum, the best mum any person could ask for, was dying. My best friend, vanishing.
"I love you" the words any person could say, but only a few could really mean. She wrapped her weak arms around my shoulders. That's the last thing I can remember before I was took there.
It's just me and my mum. Always has been, always will be. My dad left us before I was born. My mum sometimes cries, not because she misses him, but because she wants someone to care for me. She's worried about me. I don't know why? She says I need to eat more. I know since she got ill I started to eat less, I don't purposely do it. It's just because of the stress of losing her.
I can not believe she has sent me here. In this wide world of corridors and dark coloured pictures of children' fairy tale characters. Trapped, is what I am. How can she send me here, when she knows she only has a few months left and my mum wants to spend them apart? I'm told it's for the best for me by everyone. Doctors, nurses, my mentor. They don't know me or how I feel! I'll tell you how I feel. I feel dead inside like a rotting corpse.Torn apart like the prey of the worlds most vicious beast. Every cell in my broken body, every fibre in my brain is screaming trying to puke itself empty.
As I lie here, the rain patters against the freezing, secure window. The smell of coffee and fresh spring flowers enters the room. I have a visitor. He is speaking to me in an intense, monotone, low voice. Speaking words I should of learnt how to understand. I block the rest out. The comfort talk. I don't need it. I am strong, or am I? Yes, I am strong. I am ready. Speedily, I pick up the fresh spring flowers I got ordered from the florist and leave. Luckily, I have been discharged. This is my time to say goodbye.
"I love you Mum, goodnight God bless, we will meet again but for now this is goodbye my best friend." XXX