They sit, order, grin, chit chat and ask about each other as if they were contestants on The Dating Game Show of the 1970’s. Food lethargically enters their mouths as if they have forgotten how to eat. A young buck and doe, so nervous and self-conscious that their palms sweat and knees shake while sitting at the end table. They sit in the back of a not so authentic Italian restaurant – red and white checkerboard tablecloth and all. As my father recalled this story to me about his first date, it appeared that he could recall these feelings and emotions like it had occurred yesterday. Obviously, many first dates can feel excruciatingly awkward. Heck, it may even seem like your heart jumped right out onto the table and ran away. The aura surrounding love can appear daunting. Everyone strives for the lust of it, but only the lucky few obtain a story of companionship worth telling. Therefore, with all of these uncomfortable bodily feelings when nervous on first dates, is it chemical, or is it simply, love?

Not one word receives more attention than that of love. Many experience its passion, warmth and intimacy. Sadly, the majority has felt let down - coldness and turmoil come over them as soon as something of good fortune seems to come to them. I believe that love is synonymous to complexity. Nothing can make a human being ponder more than the thought of love.

Love at first sight has taken form as a colossal myth. The premises of a first date reveals the flaw of this misconception. The male takes the female out on dates to reveal what lies within. Personality and character preside over looks. Love at first sight only concludes that an individual experiences an infatuation. Basic attraction starts with physical features, but will only lasts the test of time based on personality. Therefore, the aesthetics of a woman only hint (chip away at the iceberg) at what resides internally.

Due to looks not being enough, a first date usually follows because of a mutual interest between the two. These dates can produce awkward moments and figuring them out proves tricky. Maybe both, male and female, feel it necessary to engage in meaningless conversation. For others, they try too hard to exude confidence. Heck, maybe a lack of interest becomes present. Point being - these examples make first dates much more unnerving.

According to Dr. Rachel Needle, psychologist at South University in West Palm Beach says that, “Falling in love is associated with increased energy, narrowing of mental focus, sometimes sweaty palms, light-headedness and increased heart rate”. This explains why my dad did not call back Jenny in the 11th grade.

Picking her up in his 1960 Pontiac station wagon, the night did not have high hopes to begin with. In fact, making it to the restaurant in one piece was the highlight of the entire evening. Their awkward dinner conversation came to a screeching halt. 10 o’clock was curfew for Jenny; they were already behind schedule. Creaking up her long driveway, the car came to a halt. Expecting at least a hug, he was shocked when the only thing in front of him lay her hand. The hand, petite and freckled, appeared as a sweet, yet atypical goodbye gesture. Oddly enough, he went in for the handshake. Therein lay the moment where he would not call back. With the sweat flooding my father’s hand, her palm was profusely wet. Disturbed, confused and grossed out, he zoomed home. I remember my day telling me, “Son, if she doesn’t make good conversation on the first date, she’s nervous. But if she tries to give you a handshake, get outta there!” “Shakespeareesque” would not do my father justice in describing his poetic genius, but I digress.

Perhaps Dr. Needle has made a correct statement proclaiming that when feeling love, we experience natural bodily changes, even sweaty palms. Doctor Needle also researched the bodily secretions of hormones and chemicals when put into a scenario that deals with intimacy. When tested, the subject’s bodies reported a high secretion level of ocytocin, phenelthylamine and dopamine. Widely known as “feel good” hormones, they function similar to an amphetamine. Making us feel euphoric, excited and putting us on high alert, these hormones attributed to Jenny’s sweaty palms.

To the select few who have yet to experience the awkwardness of first dates, consider yourself blessed. A first date can leave a lasting impression. It can have repercussions – including several more dates. It can even lead to relationships, scary, right? And the only way to prepare yourself – stay truthful to you. To avoid the pauses in conversation at dinner, or to contemplate the arm around her at the movies, remember to be you. Often times people in the relationships feel compelled to act as an imposter. They shield themselves to each other never showing their true character. In essence, your soul mate may lie out there for you, but acting as someone you think they will like will result in the wrong person.

Whenever the time comes for your first date, remember that it wont be the last. Endless possibilities reside for a soul mate in this world - you just need to start looking. Whether love exists, or merely acts as a fictional notion, it can result in happiness like you could not believe. Also, don’t feel afraid to fail just like Jenny. Failure often leads to success.

Hearts racing, mind contemplating, love is created. Love can be hope, and you can sure hope to love. The truth – Love cannot prove achievable for everyone. Sadly, many find themselves unhappy even with their lover of many years. So when you take that special someone on your first date, remember to stay genuine. Scientific research shows that perhaps love makes us uncontrollable wrecks. Therefore, I ask, what can the basis behind what we feel on these first dates come to, Phenethylamine, or Love?