My heart is racing. My hands start to tremble and I breathe slowly to calm myself down. I can’t afford to get nervous today. Already having done this a thousand times, I set up my equipment, walk out to my spot and wait. Then the music starts. In that moment, all my worries and fears melt away.

Color guard is my favorite form of self-expression in that it lets me channel my feelings and set free my alter ego. Whether I’m performing on a tarp or a field, I step into a specific role. Annemarie disappears and I become an audacious, ambitious entertainer who must engage the audience. It’s not an easy task - color guard asks a lot from you, and there is a lot of flag work to memorize, dance techniques to learn, and drill to commit to muscle memory. To reach the unattainable goal of perfection, you need high levels of devotion and energy. It's more than twirling a pole and smiling; it's a disciplined lifestyle that is all about pushing your body through pain in order to give people a show.

These characters I create with the help of costumes, props, and heavy makeup have ensconced motivation and determination in me. Those two things are required to not only practice the demanding work myself, but to help all my teammates look their best too. Over the years, I have changed from someone just hoping to slip by high school unnoticed to someone who can hold her head up high. Color guard has come to symbolize many things for me. It represents the confidence and friends I've gained, and the challenges that I now embrace instead of run away from.