This Girl Who Doesn't Know What to Say | Teen Ink

This Girl Who Doesn't Know What to Say

October 10, 2012
By iloveyouihateyou GOLD, Lowell, Indiana
iloveyouihateyou GOLD, Lowell, Indiana
11 articles 18 photos 72 comments

Favorite Quote:
I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.

Dear Someone,

I’m sitting here with a mug of french vanilla coffee in my hands and listening to The Offspring and Fall Out Boy. Old songs always bring back memories. It’s a cold, bitter Fall day and a I have a hat and fingerless gloves on in the house. Oddly, hats are comforting to me.

Not so odd is how I can’t think of anything to write. Words spill in my mind at the oddest, most beautiful moments and then they’re forgotten. Just last week with a nice warm sweatshirt on, the hood pulled up, I lay on the cold ground under a tall tree. Not a thing was moving, not even the withered bean field. I look up at the tree and the cloudless cerulean sky and close my eyes.

For a moment there wasn’t a sound. No rustle of the leaves and no cars passing by. I breathe in and out, open my eyes, and soak in the beauty. So there I am, staring, not thinking-just seeing. There it is. The wind suddenly notices it has to rustle the leaves and the cars are starting to be heard.

Then (even though I don’t want to) I stand up, braving the bitter wind. My feet walk on, but my mind is far away. The sun shines on the bean field. The honey golden leaves dance. Cars pass by and I walk away.

Truly Yours,

Somebody Who Doesn’t Know What to Say

The author's comments:
I thought since I can never think of the right words to write that I would just write what I was thinking at the time. Seem more reasonable in letter form.

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