I’m not anorexic…

Am I…?

I might be.

I’ve been having minor symptoms of anorexia nervosa on-and-off for about a year now, but it hasn't been serious. I’d get too caught up in comparing myself to my friends. they’re all tall, skinny. Everyone around me is pretty much flawless, except me. I tried fixing it. I still eat, but not as much as people say I should. When I decide to tell someone about how i MAY be anorexic, all they ever say is I’m beautiful, and i love it when they say that, but i NEVER agree with them, then they call me stupid for it. I’ve had countless conversations with people about it, the only thing i ever hear back is that i don't need to starve myself, and i don’t, but they don't realize how i feel. I just want to look like my friends, and maybe then ill be liked a little bit more. Maybe then ill be more confident. Maybe then i’ll be happy.

I thank God everyday that i am able to control myself when i get thoughts of starving myself. I’m not a friend of Ana’s yet, and i hope i never will be.

I have read the stories of girls who came so close to losing everything they have, including life, because they gave up everything just to make that awful little number on the scale go down. Over 25 million people of all ages, races, and genders in the U.S. alone have this disease. Once someone is diagnosed with anorexia, they become a transcendentalist.

They don’t conform to what anyone says. They’ll tell someone who they think the can trust, when that person gives them feedback, they ignore it. they stick to there own opinion. I would know, i ignore everyone elses on a daily basis. Once the disease get serious, they’ll lose all of their friends, because they don't want to be there when things really hit the floor. If they aren't close to them when they die, it won't hurt as bad when theyre gone. You won’t realize how important those lost pounds are to your life until its too late. The only thing keeping you alive is the mind set that you need to lose weight. You’ll be confident that you’ll be fine. Your goal is to be a prettier, skinnier, happier you.