“Did I ever tell you about the time when...”. This is how most stories start. Well, at least how my grandpa starts his stories. He’s chock full of stories from every period in his life, but the best stories came from his time as a fighter pilot.

I’ll start with a serious one, the time he was awarded with an Able Aeronaught Medal.

After a mission in Vietnam, he was to flying en route to the airbase where he was stationed. He had to cut through a small patch of enemy territory to get there. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the best idea. As he was flying through, BANG! He’s been hit! The left wing’s is up in flames, fuel was spewing everywhere.

Luckily, the cockpit was intact. He could have easily escaped with a simple pull of the ejector lever, but somehow he had been motivated to keep the plane in the air. He switched on his radio and tried to contact the nearest air field. Luckily, someone answered. Unluckily, he was to land in helicopter field. Still, he trudged on. He started to fly as low as he could, as slow as he could to preserve fuel and prevent himself from a 500 mph collision with a radio tower. Thankfully, by the skin of his teeth, he landed safe and sound. He was able to keep every dial, every switch just right to land in a patch of grass near the helicopter base. He was awarded with an Able Aeronaught Medal for ‘preserving a military aircraft under extreme conditions’ and, still to this day, it is one of the most amazing acts of courage I have ever heard.

Now for a funny one.

Before he was an actual fighter pilot in the war, he was stationed at a small air base in Hahn, Germany. He has dozens of stories about this place, but one I really cannot believe.

This is a story about a dangerous situation handled quite, well, peculiarly. One time, his buddies and him got a chance to fly to Hong Kong. Now, when the other fighter pilots took word of this, they jumped on an opportunity. Each pilot wanted something or other that they could get for cheap in china. Records, television sets, even small pieces of furniture. All you need to know is that he had a long list of random stuff. About $1,000 worth of random stuff. Once he got there, he began to collect everything. They had to load it up into a plane that was designed for heavy loads. Once they left Hong Kong, my grandpa got to sleep in the back first. Everything is going well, until he wakes up. Left wing doesn’t look too good. Engines shouldn't be smoking, right?

Turns out there was a malfunction of some sort in the engine. The plane wouldn’t be able to fly, unless there was a lighter load. That either means: Everyone jumps out of the plane with no parachute, or the throw $1,000 worth of goodies out the back. Two outcomes here; Die and nobody gets their stuff, or live and nobody gets their stuff.
Of course, they selected outcome B, but that means they had to dispose of all their stuff. (Don’t worry, they were over the ocean, nobody would get hurt.) The cargo-esque plane had a emergency hatch to open the back. My grandpa unclips the down straps, and starts to dispose of the inventory. A desk chair, a record player, a bed side table. Everything has got to go. After it all was gone, luckily, they were able to fly at a low speed. They were able to make it home, only empty handed. Yeah, I bet he wasn’t the most popular person that day.

I could set here and write tons more on his adventures as a fighter pilot, or anything from any point in his life, but you just were able to read my personal favorites. My grandpa has a story for everything, and they are some of the funniest, most amazing or uplifting stories I have ever heard. Now, about that one time he TP’ed an airbase using his airplane...