Breathing Air, Smelling Roses, Crossing Bridges | Teen Ink

Breathing Air, Smelling Roses, Crossing Bridges

February 23, 2016
By Sardonyx BRONZE, Palo Alto, California
Sardonyx BRONZE, Palo Alto, California
4 articles 3 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
Be Your Wild, Courageous, Brilliant Self Every Single Day. No Matter What


I was afraid of practically everything as a child: the dark, monsters underneath the bed, the size of the universe, zombie viruses. But nothing terrified me more than speculating about what was going to happen in the future- how one unreasonable decision or misguided step could potentially determine my entire fate. My view on life resembled an interminable bridge characterized by an unknown destination, an endless distance, and an ocean of lava gurgling menacingly beneath it. Those were the thoughts that clouded my conscience the day I decided to walk across the Golden Gate Bridge, with full awareness of one of my many fears- heights. Perhaps it was how insidiously close the other side looked, or the fact that the sky looked so hauntingly beautiful. Either way, I felt like I did not have much of a choice in the matter. Despite my overwhelming feelings of paranoia and self-doubt, I felt that I needed to prove to myself that I could face an unimaginable fear without even the slightest concern for what would happen next.


The moment I set foot on the bridge I felt as if I had made a terrible mistake- that if I were to take one more step, I would never see the light of day again. I squeezed tightly onto the railing as I forced myself to inch my way forward, and froze as the ground gave way to my weight and a hand clenched around my neck, suffocating me until I could no longer breathe.


"You will never reach the end," a voice as cold as ice hissed. "You are not capable of it. You should probably give up and turn around right this instant."


I chose to ignore the discouragement; I instinctively knew I was courageous enough to conquer my fear of the future instead of cowering at the thought of it. I continued on my path, even adventurously sliding my hand across the crimson railing every now and then or pausing to catch my breath while gripping onto a nearby rung for dear life. I gazed about my surroundings, feeling the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end and the goosebumps on my flesh travel up my forearm. My heart skipped a beat as I focused on my destination- a place that seemed so realistically close yet so unimaginably far at the same time. When I finally maneuvered to the other side of the bridge, I was flooded with emotions of exhilarating relief followed by an unexpected feeling of such overwhelming happiness and accomplishment.


That fateful day, I managed to conquer and defeat my inner ghosts of doubt and insecurity by facing the situation directly. I decided to take the challenge one step at a time, ensuring that I took a break at each suspension cable of the bridge while admiring the gorgeous view of the San Francisco Bay. I breathed in the scent of the ocean and listened to the sound of the waves crashing against the rocky shore below- simply enjoying the moment and unearthing tranquility in the midst of trepidation. The feeling of achievement that served as a stepping stone toward my adulthood that day was having the peace to breathe without hyperventilating over whether or not I would be able to reach my final destination in one piece. It was how I grew from a child who constantly worried about the ghoul hidden below her staircase to a teenager who frequently obsessed over her future to a young adult who learned to take time to smell the roses. To me, the best part about meeting a goal was never the ephemeral rush of happiness I felt as I laid my fingertips on the prize, but reflecting on the lessons I have learned, the people I have met, and the bridges I had to cross in order to obtain it.



Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 0 comments.