It’s a sunny day. I glance at you, smiling,
Pretending I’m okay.
You ask me how I am.
My smile fades, my eyes dart to the floor.
You look at me,
Tell me to sit, and shut the door.
You want to know what’s up,
What’s wrong?
How do I answer?
Will you understand
If I tell you I’m sick of being strong?
Will you understand if I tell you that all
I want to do is disappear,
I just want to melt?
You see, the problem with me is that I don’t forget.
Everything horrible that’s ever happened to me,
I remember.
Every little insult, look, rumor, it was all felt..
“I’m okay.”
I tell you with withdrawn emotion.
What else was I supposed to do,
What else was I supposed to say?
Surprisingly, you got up, gave me
A sad smile,
Then walked away.
I sat there in that room by myself,
Alone, I thought you were my friend,
I had hoped you would stay…
But evidently, that hope is too now
Blown.
But it’s all right, I’m fine, I’ll be okay.