I sleep in it.

I eat in it.

I live in it.

At night,

while I lay in it,

I think about him.

The jacket gives me warmth,

just like he would give me.

It engulfs me in his scent

and I imagine his arms.

In my mind he holds me.

The jacket is him.

It's like he's with me,

even when I know he won't be with me

in reality.

His jacket replaces him.

It hugs me,

it warms me,

it keeps me safe from the harsh cold of the world.

I can't bring myself to wash it though.

Not for a couple days at least.

Because when I washed it,

he was gone.

His scent no longer wrapped around me.

All I smell now is bitter loneliness.

It leaves me empty.

The cold tears at my skin like a whip.

Now it's just polyester,

barely keeping me warm.

I can only love him from afar,

as his friend.

And that’s all I'll ever be.

So his jacket will just have to love me.