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Cotton Candy This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

puffs of sweet fiberglass
dissolve into pink crystals
on the pinnacle of my tongue.

they fall like tickled icicles
puncturing the walls
of my abdomen.

still I consume
the addicting substance,
permitting my body
to slowly commit suicide.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.




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HollerGirl26 said...
Nov. 26, 2011 at 4:50 pm:
This is fabulous...I love the "non-caps" and the stunning words...I have a feeling this isn't just about cotton candy...great metaphor ;)
 
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Ella1 said...
Nov. 26, 2011 at 9:54 am:
I love the imagery!
 
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TaurusGal This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Nov. 4, 2011 at 11:41 pm:
Pure genius~!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
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purplebutterfly said...
Nov. 4, 2011 at 12:19 pm:
i love this poem and it also talks about how cotton candy is like a slow suicide and the way you put or discribe your imagery is amazing! keep up the great work!
 
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AmayaSakaruta said...
Nov. 4, 2011 at 8:41 am:
also...SHAMELESS SELF PROMOTION! please check out some of my work? thank u
 
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AmayaSakaruta said...
Nov. 4, 2011 at 8:41 am:
i love how descriptive you are about something so simple that people take for granted. that's what i think a really good writer does, look at something pretty common and say it in a way that makes people think, man, i ne ver thought about it like that before :D
 
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taytaynichole said...
Oct. 21, 2011 at 8:34 pm:
love the words you used:)
 
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silver47 said...
Oct. 13, 2011 at 8:46 pm:
greta poem love the description :)
 
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Greenpaw said...
Oct. 13, 2011 at 7:08 pm:
Great vocabulary, very well done. If anyone has time can they give feedback on my poetry?
 
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RosePetal519 said...
Oct. 13, 2011 at 3:54 pm:
Wow super intense! Great use of vocabulary and truly original!
 
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WeAllBurn said...
Sept. 21, 2011 at 12:15 pm:
amazing. (:
 
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weitlaufsummer said...
Sept. 21, 2011 at 9:29 am:
this is really decriptive and it changes your thoughts on cotton candy
 
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Skillz said...
Sept. 13, 2011 at 11:06 am:
I loved how you explained that cotton candy was addictive.
 
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Scott_Pilgrim331 said...
Aug. 31, 2011 at 2:05 pm:
This really dipicts what happens to one, when doing drugs.
 
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r1chard said...
Aug. 31, 2011 at 1:29 pm:
I like how you used cotton candy as a symbol for drugs; it is true that for many people in this word drugs are like cotton candy sweet good and makes them feel good. I like how you said do it can be deadly in different ways although it is a simple necessity to sum.
 
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TheCreator said...
Aug. 31, 2011 at 12:28 pm:
I liked how it talked about how it feels when cotton candy enters your mouth and loving while knowing that it is unhealthy.
 
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AbstractFragment This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 30, 2011 at 9:28 pm:
I enjoyed this and I like what this says to me. I like this whole "slowly comitting suicide theme" and the kind of evocative image of a body breaking down which are themes I am personally familiar with in my own writing. For being so short this is imagery heaven.
 
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LittleMissSunshine08_11 said...
Aug. 30, 2011 at 1:50 pm:
Wow! People usually think of cotton candy as something sweet, or weak, even... I love how this poem explores the dark side of something so innocent!
 
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nathanielmcd said...
Aug. 30, 2011 at 9:45 am:
Hey, um are you actually talking about cotton candy? or are you just talking about fiberglass? I honesly did not even know that people even ate fiberglass.
 
freedomfighter97 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Aug. 31, 2011 at 9:13 am :
The cotton candy is a symbol of our current-day issue with our junk food consumption.  I mainly wrote this as an ode to my brother, who has Type 1 Diabetes.  We were at a baseball game and my mother reminded him that eating cotton candy will kill him if he eats too much.  It's true of all of us, though.
 
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