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Daddy's Womb This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

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i asked my father if i could swim,
and he said that i would drown.
The Sea would imprison me – he said
if my feet had left the ground.

So i walked out to the water,
and cried out – how ’bout now!
He said, a little bit further, Son,
and then you’ll leave the ground.

i stepped on sand then stone,
from hollow ground to sturdy.
The sky was at my level as I
gazed at the birdie.

The Sea brought me a new idea,
the urge to flee to the high.

i asked my Father if i could fly,
and he said, sure, Son – go try.

i jumped as high as i could.
Still, i landed on the ground.
i saw my Father pull on a chain,
then i knew that i was bound.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.




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sammyyyyyyyyyyyy said...
Jan. 23 at 5:24 pm
I really like your poem!
 
RedPanda said...
Jan. 23 at 10:21 am
amazing. this is fantastic!!! Keep writing, this is really good.
 
rosevomitThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 16 at 9:02 pm
I love dissss yoooo
 
gemma_ryuThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 13 at 1:38 pm
Amazing! Keep writing!!
 
AllyssaWrites said...
Jan. 12 at 9:48 am
This is fantastic, I really love the subtle rhyme that adds to the light hearted feeling of this poem. (:
 
dglee917 said...
Jan. 7 at 12:26 am
I honestly don't get it
 
JoieReneeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Jan. 5 at 10:15 am
Truly amazing!
 
BlossomM. said...
Jan. 1 at 8:01 pm
Very well done. I could clearly see it and I found the theme interesting. Good job and beautifuly done.
 
DietCokeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Dec. 28, 2014 at 4:50 pm
This is beautiful.
 
AlexDeWriter replied...
Mar. 6 at 9:58 am
Wow this as beautiful
 
-L.k.R-This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Dec. 24, 2014 at 11:15 am
I feel the emotions very clearly. I'm looking forward for your new works.
 
Jacob G. said...
Dec. 21, 2014 at 7:41 pm
Absolutely Beautiful.
 
Inmind said...
Dec. 19, 2014 at 8:43 am
I like this
 
SweetCaroline14This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Dec. 10, 2014 at 5:12 pm
Beautifull. I look forward to more of your work.  
 
corrections123 replied...
Jan. 5 at 1:40 pm
Beautiful has one l
 
Brian110This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Dec. 10, 2014 at 8:07 am
You know, This poem has got to be the best poem this website has ever seen. When ever I read poems this poem always is "today's top voted poem" and I can se for my self the reason. 
 
KaylieJ said...
Dec. 9, 2014 at 7:05 pm
Obviously I can't be sure, since I'm not the writer of this poem, but I feel like he used the lack of capitalization as emphasis on the way his father belittles him. I mean, clearly it was not laziness; he capitalized other words like "Son" multiple times throughout. So there must have been a reason for capitalizing in the way that he did.
 
Ashley K. replied...
Dec. 9, 2014 at 7:23 pm
I think you're right here. Father and sea were both capitalized,while "I" was not. This was probably to elaborate on how he was viewed as the least important, and smallest entity in the poem. 
 
Jackson1997 said...
Dec. 9, 2014 at 3:22 pm
This poem is sub-par
 
Dylan R. said...
Dec. 5, 2014 at 1:30 pm
it was good story
 
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