noticed had I- | Teen Ink

noticed had I-

December 29, 2009
By abeatlesfan65 GOLD, Stillwater, Minnesota
abeatlesfan65 GOLD, Stillwater, Minnesota
19 articles 0 photos 55 comments

Favorite Quote:
"My greatest trouble is getting the curtain up and down." - T.S. Eliot


noticed had I-
such a discerning light,
of no concern to that which is right-
I quickly a pen reached
and since, began to write-
'tis a lesson twice learned

strive you so to help-him-
alas-of it-what good comes?
dependence now makes he
-the child-
less than he once was-
and you-
sufferer of the Good Cause-
only serve to worsen-
though one of good sight
needs only one to look upon


The author's comments:
This is about letting others learn how to be independent. I tried to model the style after Emily Dickinson's, one of my favorite poets. See what you think.

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This article has 2 comments.


on Feb. 9 2010 at 7:21 pm
abeatlesfan65 GOLD, Stillwater, Minnesota
19 articles 0 photos 55 comments

Favorite Quote:
"My greatest trouble is getting the curtain up and down." - T.S. Eliot

Thanks! Though I can't help but notice... is every poem the same to you? I hope I don't offend you, but I think you would sound more sincere if you mixed it up a bit. Just something I noticed, but all the same, I appreciate the comment!

on Feb. 9 2010 at 2:56 pm
AbbotRabbit GOLD, Abolana, District Of Columbia
11 articles 0 photos 1028 comments

Favorite Quote:
This poem has great flow and insight.
I really enjoyed it.
Lovely poem darling =]
-Please check out the works that I have posted on here it would be highly appreciated and I think you would greatly enjoy them, Thankk youz-
XxIll tell you Im an orphan after you meet myy familyXx

This poem has great flow and insight.

I really enjoyed it.

Lovely poem darling =]

-Please check out the works that I have posted on here it would be highly appreciated and I think you would greatly enjoy them, Thankk youz-

XxIll tell you Im an orphan after you meet myy familyXx