He's Gone

October 13, 2009
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Its been 2 months, but I feel worse that i did those 2 months he spent in jail.
He doesn't come around much anymore, nobody wants to talk to him except for me, everything's changing I feel like I've failed.
the best I've felt in these 2 months was getting a good night sleep. everything hurts including my smile, surprisingly as much I used to I never weep.
My inspiration is sitting on the fence it doesn't get much worse but it gets no better since I've not been around him.
The hardest part of holding myself together is knowing there's not a single thing here he would miss.
Don't get me wrong some things have changed for the better, but none of it seems worth it without him.
The emotions i have are rushing around,most nights i find myself laying crazily chill on the ground. This is not about what it used to be, with this new piece of me missing it's not my top priority I've found.
I just wanna feel myself glow and feel my body parts flutter around inside me.
I just wanna talk with him in person again, know everything and be there for the timeing.
Both months have been just draggin on and on.
scribbleing out the sound of the single beats in my heart just thinking about how hes gone.

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