the Storm of Feelings

September 25, 2009
By BellaFlor BRONZE, Victorville, California
BellaFlor BRONZE, Victorville, California
2 articles 0 photos 2 comments

it came, just like a thunderstorm,
crept in, clouds in all,
and the love flourished all to me, gradually,
i first noticed his features,
then his smile, and his laughter,
the clouds, califlower like and beautiful in shape,
they rolled in over the mountains,
i didnt notice him till he came into view,
then as the clouds came closer,
so did he,
closer to my heart,
then, as time passed,
a thunderstorm hit,
it was amazing,
the lightning struck
his love hit me,
and filled me with joy,
then the clouds roared,
the rain came,
and so did the sorrow, and emptiness,
but soon the thunderstorm slowly flowed away,
the talks died out,
and the clouds departed,
when it left,
so did his feelings for me.

The author's comments:
Commas mean a break or a short pause in your reading, and will be useful if you read with the pauses.

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This article has 2 comments.

on Sep. 10 2010 at 10:30 pm
Thoughtful-Inker SILVER, Port Neches, Texas
9 articles 3 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
Everything is okay is the end; if it's not okay, it's not the end.

This is quite a beautifuly written piece of work. I love the metaphor behind it. This poem is, in my opinion, very well structured. I agree with SarahZ: Please keep writing! I'd love to follow your work.

on Oct. 11 2009 at 1:14 pm
JohnDeereGirl DIAMOND, Westerlo, New York
61 articles 36 photos 216 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I'm not"
"Somewhere betweeen us talking, you saying I deserve better, and you making me laugh when I wanted to cry, I fell in love with you."

wow i love thi spoem. i can relate to is 100%. keep writing!


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