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Reality Check

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What if I wanted to break away from society?
A culture
Where war replaces peace
Where money replaces love
Where emotions run dry
Where coping with it doesn't apply
Is this the kind of community we want to live in?
Would you stop me from leaving?-- Can you blame me for cheating?
Cheating
My way out
Of life.
Out of School. Out of Love. Out of Pain.
Out of this
Repulsive palce
I live in
Where being a terrorist is as easy as
Having brown skin
Is this what we want to live in?
A corrupt place where rules are
Pushed aside
Where solving problems are resolved
With homocide..
So
Don't blame me for breaking away
Where there is a place hatred won't go anyway
Where
Love has meaning and is not
Replaced
By something green
Where peace reins
Over war
Where emotions rise
Above more than just words that are said
Now put these ideas inside your head
Tell me what you think now
Because if you don't think differently somehow
Then there is no hope for the future and the now!




Join the Discussion


This article has 141 comments. Post your own!

dule_91 said...
Jan. 14, 2009 at 8:35 pm:
Wow! I don't remember the last time i read something this beautiful! It's so realistic! great job... dushan
 
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joe shmoe said...
Jan. 14, 2009 at 8:56 pm:
that was a really good poem i wish i could write poetry like that
 
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Tristin said...
Jan. 14, 2009 at 5:55 pm:
Wow!! thats really deep. i love it!!
 
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gabby32 said...
Jan. 14, 2009 at 1:14 am:
wow, is all i can say! this piece was amazing...it kept a strong focus on what is happening in the world. awesome! keep going!
 
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Tahira'sRayne said...
Jan. 13, 2009 at 7:07 pm:
I fell in love with this poem after reading the first line! You are really good! Keep it up... =)
 
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Martin75 said...
Jan. 12, 2009 at 6:28 pm:
I really did like this one. Its unavoidable that this world is getting worse but whether we want to believe it or not we do have the power to change.



My friend has a poem on here too come check it out if you want?



TeenInk.com/raw/WhatMatters/article/64616/Stars/ :)
 
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tarastar69 said...
Jan. 13, 2009 at 2:55 pm:
amazing!! ur really good
 
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BubbaTom said...
Jan. 13, 2009 at 2:15 am:
I think your poem was amazing i would love to read some more some time
 
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jj23girl said...
Jan. 12, 2009 at 3:41 am:
This poem shows immense insight and thought, though it has A LOT of room to improve...
 
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LoveSerena said...
Jan. 11, 2009 at 9:07 pm:
If you wouldnt mind your poem was the most beautifulestpoem ever and I really absolutly thnink you should turn it into a song ....Love, Serena age12
 
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ReadingLaura said...
Jan. 10, 2009 at 9:51 pm:
The epitome of teen cliches. Not so original or inspiring. Too negative. Lighten up.
 
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Sol said...
Jan. 10, 2009 at 2:08 pm:
Truly, one of my favorites by far. The entire wanting to break from a dystopian society is done so perfectly, you almost feel like it's a possibility. It even gives people the spark of faith that humanity can in fact become more civilized; which only starts when the realization that "we are all just people" idea.

Well done, and you certainly are growing a crowd. Congratulations.

Sol
 
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Stormy15 said...
Jan. 10, 2009 at 6:14 am:
This was really deep and i REALLY LOVED IT! keep up the incredible work,
your awesome!!!!!
 
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JustNora said...
Jan. 10, 2009 at 2:14 am:
I absolutely adore this. You reveals everything we think about but never say. i say you should work with this and submit to more places. THE WORLD SHOULD READ THIS!
 
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SkaterGurl17 said...
Jan. 10, 2009 at 12:52 am:
i love it!
if you put your heart into something then its gonna be amazing..
and it looks like you did and you gave it thought..keep up the good work
 
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Natalie K. said...
Jan. 9, 2009 at 3:45 am:
I think that you people that are being negative are being very mean.
I would say that this is awesome- except for the fact that you're my competition.
It's okay to be "pessimistic" (that is negative connotation of my part) once in a while. If you live in a "happy world" all the time, you're not living life to the fullest. Sorrows come so that you can learn from them.
I wish you weren't my competition because you're so good... and you're tough competition, Vi... (more »)
 
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kittehgnar said...
Jan. 7, 2009 at 12:25 am:
i like this poem a lot. the depth is really eye opening (in a small way). I love how it wraps around at the end back to the beginning in a way.
 
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KT said...
Jan. 6, 2009 at 5:07 pm:
wow this is impressive.
I don't even know where to start, but I'll try to point out what makes it be so good. In my eyes, it's becasue you
-see the world realistic, through a teens eyes
-want to kick people, make them take notice
-have a great style doing so
-put it down in a way that visually strengthens the words' meanings.
Uhm so I think that's bout it.
You're poem is wonderful and I hope thered be more of those out here. And there prolly are, we ju... (more »)
 
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destinee said...
Jan. 5, 2009 at 1:46 pm:
Definitely a good poem, with an excellent meaning. However, I think that you can improve the wordings. You know, edit a bit?
 
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darktiger said...
Jan. 4, 2009 at 8:50 pm:
this is a great poem, i can picture it in my mind of how you see the world. its like how i feel deep down inside, and you totally understand it. your super awesome and keep up the good work.
 
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