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Falling in Love...

sweetangel4life
Falling in Love...
Summary: Melony has always been beaten, hit, or has disappointed her father. He pressures her to be the perfect daughter.And it seems that way on the outside, but she's actually quite the opposite. She meets Patrick while on a smoke break at her job, and immediately she knows something. He's cute. And honest. One day, Malory is out on the boardwalk when he happens to show up. She tells everything about her life to this stranger, and eventually, they fall in love.





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This book has 4 comments. Post your own now!

KateLA said...
Apr. 2, 2013 at 9:26 pm
I love how you seem to be experimenting with different words and ways to tell the story, in present and past tense, and with the main character writing letters. I thought it was a really good story and liked how other teenagers can relate to it. I just think it needs a little more description like when it says Patrick got into the car accident-it would be nice to have more explanation and description on that and why he only had one call. I enjoyed reading this, you should write more!
 
sweetangel4life replied...
Apr. 3, 2013 at 7:27 pm
thanks, ur comment really made my day :) i will take ur critisim gadly and when i edit it next, i will be sure to expound on these matters. i appreciate so much that u took the time to read it. again, i hate the title too lol. i wrote it when i was 11, im 14 now. thanks again. and ur book was really good :)
 
nemish23 said...
May 23, 2012 at 4:57 am

This is really sweet and really cute and I love the idea you have.

It think some of the description could be a little clearer, it would help the story to run a little smoother.

But well done, I keep writing, you have talent!

<3

 
sweetangel4life replied...
May 23, 2012 at 9:43 am
thanksss!!!!
 

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