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The Summer I Found Myself

By , Flint, MI
Chapters:   1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 8 Next »

A New Beginning

The day started out like any other. I woke up with the sun shining down over my head. As I stretched I rolled over on my belly to look out my window that overlooked the backyard. It was a beautiful day. Not a cloud in sight.
I got up and got dressed for the first day of summer. This is going to be the best summer of my life.
Shelly, my best friend, came over around 3 to pick me up so we could go to the mall and get new bathing suits. I got in her car as a song blaring full blast wound down to the end.
“So, tonight there is a party over at Dylan’s house” Shelly told me.
“Were we even invited?” I asked skeptical.
“Not technically, but do you think that anyone is ever invited?”
“Yea, I actually do. You know most people aren’t outcasts like us. They actually get invited to parties. It’s like a code or something.” I said as I looked over at her.
“Macy, If we don’t go to the first party of the summer people are going to peg us as losers for our senior year. Not that we aren’t already. Live a little, please?” Shelly begged from me.
“Fine, but if it gets uncomfortable, I’m leaving. No buts. Deal?” I said firmly.
“Alright. Deal.” She said as she turned up the radio and began singing along to some Carrie Underwood.
We got to the mall and Shelly and I began looking at cute skirts and wedges. We both bought a cute party outfit for tonight as well as some extremely cute bathing suits. My bathing suit has ruffles on the edges and is a soft pink color. Shelly’s bathing suit is platinum blue with green stripes down it.
As we got back to my house, Shelly told me she would be back to get me around 10 tonight. As much as I’d like to deny it, I was pretty excited. I mean, for once I would be able to socialize like a normal person.
Me and Shelly were not sent to social exile by fault. We chose to spend time studying for quizzes on the weekend when normal teens were out drinking. Which in fact pegged us as the academic nerds. Were not ugly. I mean, both of us have average weight . But not like those other girls who choose not to eat and become twigs. We’re normal.
I have really long brown hair accumulated after I went on this strike after my mom cut my hair in a bob in freshman year. As it turns out, it’s pretty wavy. Shelly is a natural blond that is cut at shoulder length. Her mom takes her to the Salon so she never had to go through the traumatic stages of puberty the way I did.
Shelly has always worn make-up but I don’t see the reason to put any on. I only wear make-up on special occasions or if I’m really trying to impress someone.
I’ve been asked out a few times but me and Shelly just tend to keep to our studies. “If you ever want to get into Brown you need to be prepared.” Shelly would always tell me after I would start complaining about prepping for the SAT s.
This summer though, after we finally realized that we are practically graduated we’d both decided that we would become more socially active. Or in Shelly’s case, Get drunk and for once not care about school or any of the other pressures that had been laid out for us.
Shelly arrived over my house around 10:30. I walked downstairs and past the living room where my mom and dad were watching a show on TV.
“Where are you going?” My mom turned from the TV screen and looked at me.
“Me and Shelly are going to go to the movies and then I’m going to stay the night at her house.” As I told her the first thing that had popped into my head.
“Why are you dressed like that? I don’t want you out traipsing downtown at the theater wearing clothes like that.” She scorned.
As she said that my dad then looked over at me.
“Mom please, I just thought for once I would care what my appearance looked like. It’s not a big deal.” I said.
After a few moments passed she finally said “Alright, but don’t forget your mace. You can never be too safe at night.” She said as she looked at me carefully, like she could see right through my lies. But when I thought she was going to send me back to my room to change, her and my dad both turned their attention back to the screen.
I slipped out the door and climbed in the front seat of Shelly's car.
“Gosh, I thought you were going to take forever.” She playfully laughed.
“Sorry, my mom decided that tonight she would pay attention to me or what I wore. I’m good now though. She just told me to bring my mace.” I said back.
“Nice, did she use the whole ‘You can never be too safe’ line on you?” She asked teasingly.
“Funny, but she actually did.” I laughed.
Chapters:   1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 8 Next »

Join the Discussion

This book has 89 comments. Post your own now!

The Writer said...
Dec. 12, 2010 at 1:51 pm
Thanks for the comments. But just to clear this up, This is my first book that I have ever written and Right now Im in the stage where I am literally trying to get everything out. I have not gone back and edited or anything like that. I thank you for the feedback. I appreciate that you took the time out to critique it. 
OfficialApprover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 11, 2010 at 3:32 pm



I've read the first chapter so far, and here are my thoughts:


The outcast MC.  Eh.  I'm sorry, it's a little bit overdone.  The MC that 'doesn't care about their appearance' and all that, they're 'not cool' and 'don't fit in' then they decide to be pretty and V.O.I.L.A guys like them.


I've just seen too much of that.


Telling not showing.  This is a problem.  A big rule of writing ... (more »)

ShaSha replied...
Dec. 12, 2010 at 1:43 pm
I def agree to the fullest extent. This book could be sooo much better if you went back and fixed it up. 
lovelycheese said...
Dec. 10, 2010 at 11:06 pm

I can see a lot of potential into this story. The plot is intriguing, but the characters aren't as developed. Bounce back their words in your head and think: Would they actually be saying this? The grammar and punctuation is a bit distracting here as well.

Overall, great story. I liked it a lot. Beautiful(:

DiamondsIntheGrass This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 10, 2010 at 4:50 pm
nice...intrigued... but what was the word 'summary' for in the begining? and somewhere in there i'm pretty sure there is a typo. 
PrincessSparkle replied...
Jan. 19, 2011 at 7:18 pm
Yea, I caught that too. But I can't go back and edit it. I would, but I can't.
MissNiceGirl23 said...
Dec. 9, 2010 at 5:18 pm
It's very nice, I enjoyed it. Though would it bother you if I provided a few tips? Just for help making it even MORE proffesional. :) I think some of the sentences are good in detail but maybe a bit choppy? I think it might be a good idea to let the sentences run a bit more into a complete thought. But other than that, I really liked it and your grammar and use of language is quite nice. You have amazing potential as well as this story!
thewriteidea This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Dec. 8, 2010 at 5:16 pm

this is really good! you really captured me into the story by the first chapter. the only suggestion i have to make is to watch out for little punctuation errors. they can really throw off the reader!

check out my novel on here, too if you'd like like! keep writing!

lbr17 said...
Dec. 8, 2010 at 4:19 pm
Really cute! Enjoyed it :]

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