The heartbreak of it all
Author's note: The book "The Pigman" inspired this, and has a sort-of similar plot.
6It was a cold January day and Amelia and I were walking to school together, about three weeks after being in the hospital. She hadn't been killed, but we knew it would happen sooner or later, just not specifically when.
When we got to school, the big b**** was on her usual routine of making fun of Amelia for being the “cancer kid”, which, quite frankly, was NOT funny.
At lunch that day, Amelia and I were sitting in the cafeteria (we were dating at this point, just not publicly). She was eating part of a Mars chocolate bar, when all of a sudden she fell over. Just completely fell. I swear I saw everything flash before my eyes because I automatically thought she'd died. I thought she was dead and i'd never speak to her again.
It turned out she'd just had a heard attack, and was functional just shortly after. I was so relieved it felt like a thousand pounds lifted off my shoulders.
The sad thing is, she died later that night. Nobody even called me about it, so I didn't know until lunch the next day when I was finally alerted about the incident. The heart attack was due to the cancer, and the cancer just took over. I sat there at lunch, in the back corner of the library, crying. I cried and cried until I felt like a god damn desert, and then suddenly I was just another ocean of tears. She was gone for good this time. I wanted to die. I wanted to kill myself but I resolved that it wasn't worth it. Not over one girl. Even if it was my best friend i've ever had...
It's July now, July twenty-seventh to be exact. Tomorrow will be my sixteenth birthday, which I shared with my former best friend...
I'm trying to make the best of it, no matter what has happened. I'm trying to just keep calm and keep my life going, but today, all I can think about is how I never heard from Amelia's family after her death... no funeral, nothing. They just dissappeared. It was terrible. So how can I be sure she's dead? Maybe she just moved. Maybe.
But I doubt it.
It's the middle of the night and my phone is ringing. I hear it ringing and ringing and ringing. I look at the clock and it's precisely two a.m. I pick up the phone and press talk.
“Yes, who's this?”
I sat straight up.
And then I really woke up.
Sometimes life is hard. I'm one of those people who pretends things aren't happening, and so was the love of my life. But hey, you shouldn't, we see how that worked for her.
I'm fine now. A man who dares waste an hour doesn't know what he's going to miss one day.
As said in a famous quote, “Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” I think that's what we all need to do.