Cirque Du someday

December 9, 2011
By VanessaViolet, port moody, Other
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VanessaViolet, Port Moody, Other
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As I walk out on the stage, the warm spot light shines on my face. It’s my time, center stage with an audience of hundreds. The music starts, that my que. Grasping the silky rope in front of me, I start. Using every muscle in my body I do all I can to extend point and perform to the best of my ability. As the audience applauds running back stage my parents both there to congratulate me. Then they make their way out onto the stage. Yes this is my family circus, starting at a young age it has been my duty to eat breath and dream circus. Of course from years of performing all I want is a chance to have my act on the big stage in Las Vegas. My warm thoughts of performing with Cirque Du Soleil get rudely interrupted by the ranting of my parents; it’s a usual for the backstage life of our Circus. Still half dazed in my day dreams, It’s my time to make it back out on the stage.

Cleaning up after the show is my least favourite part, from my peripheral vision if can see my dad approaching me. “Hey honey, great show tonight! Were having a meeting today around 10:00pm in the studio”. I wonder what that was all about; hopefully it will intervene with chores. Walking into the studio, it looks like everyone is here! My mom and dad are standing at the front of the studio, as they stand the room becomes silent. My dad starts off the meeting, “Hello all and thank you for joining us, great work today it was a success. As you all know this is our 17th year on the stage and it’s been quite the amazing several years. But with funds we are going to have to take a break, come up with some new acts, a new show name and then we’ll be up and running again.” Someone in the audience raises their hand, “Alan, how are you expecting us to make it without any money in the meantime?” My dad then goes on explaining that they can either find a way to make it through the next few months or find another job. After that explanation it was astonishing and heartbreaking too see how many people had left the room after that remark. My mom then stormed out of the room, and then my dad with the look as if he were about to break down in tears. He then said, “That’s it, it’s over. We can’t go on making new acts and fund enough money to keep the circus going. This is the end of ‘A Circus in Time’” I couldn’t let them see all see my heart break, I ran out of the room as fast as I could and into the change room. Falling to my knees crying. How could they do this to me? After so many years of being a family, spending every waking minute with them. They just walk out on me like that.

It must have been almost an hour before making my way back to the trailer; I could hear my parents tent. Laying on the old red curtain I was thinking. What now, is that it? Do I now have no future in circus? It’s all have been working for so what is in store for me now? I’ve dedicated my whole lifetime to circus and now it’s gone. I would have never guessed that tomorrow night would be my last time on stage for who knows how long.
1
I walked into to my ‘house’ and only saw my mom. She then led on by saying “Your Dad is gone. He left last night.” Like this day could get worse she then went on saying that since we couldn’t afford to stay in Rhode Island so we were going to move to California and live with my Aunt Rhonda and Uncle Stan. So not only was it my last night on the stage but it was also my last day with my best friend Star. This is going to be a hard day. Calling up Star I didn’t have the heart to tell her over the phone so I asked her to come over ASAP. I hear a knock on the door, and my heart skips a beat. This is it. Star then running in to greet me her long black hair whipping me in the face I could tell that she ran here because her pale white skin had been painted with bright red cheeks. This is what would be the hardest thing I would probably have to do in a lifetime. “Star... I’m moving, to California.” Her face went blank. No expression what so ever. I then hugged her explaining that I would be back to Rhode island whenever I could. “I’m coming to your show tonight Zoe, I really don’t know how I’m going to live without you, when are you leaving?” “I’m leaving tomorrow at 11am.”

Hearing the Audio version of my Dad’s introduction tonight was the last night I am going to be on stage, tomorrow I’ll be in a new state, a new home, and be all alone facing a real school with totally new people. I hear my que, walking out onto the stage feeling the warm spotlights on my face and the presents of the packed theatre, this is my last night on stage, grabbing my silk and climbing up and performing to my best of ability. We don’t normally send off the audience but since it was the last night we all thought that it was acceptable. I look among the crowd for Star’s long pitch black hair and then see her. Her pale face wasn’t so pale, but almost as if it was raw from crying. I ran to her as fast as I could and wrapped my arms around her. The arena was clear from the audience, the only one who was still there was star. We had not moved, but it was time to say our goodbyes. “Star, you are my best friend and always will be. I’ll call you all the time and keep you updated”, “Goodbye Zoe”. We hugged, cried and went our separate ways.

I was lost, in this big world with hundreds of possibilities. The one person I had always gone to was my mom, I called for her and then went into the auditorium and saw her there laying in the middle of the stage. Walking up to her I went and laid beside her. “Zoe, just like you it was always my dream to perform with Cirque Du Soleil, even though I ended up here, it was an amazing journey. Even thought i didn’t make it as far as I wished, I kept perusing my dream and never gave up. California will be different. But you need to make sure you hold onto the feeling you get when you walk on the stage and all attention is on you.

We both had out bags packed and were ready for California. The taxi came and stuffed our bags in the trunk on the roof and surrounding us in the truck. As we were driving away I looked out my window to see the tent being taken down and our trailers hauled away. This Is really happening. My life is now over. After a 7 hour flight, we had arrived in one piece to California, walking around the LAX was an experience in itself. As my mom and I were approaching the exit doors where my Aunt and Uncle were to pick us up it seemed liked she was franticly trying to make herself look perfect, after finishing herself then went on fixing my hair and exclaiming “Zoe, your aunt and I haven’t always gotten along the most. Although she is my sister she is one of those people who will do anything to impress anyone with her money.” Walking out the doors and seeing a black stretch limo, the door opening and my aunt attempting to run to greet us in her black Gucci stilettos’ was quite a sight to see. We were all gathered in the limo and trying to start a conversation with my aunt and uncle was very awkward. “So darling sister how was your flight”, my mom then exclaimed “It was quite the adventure”. I felt my head bobbing then fell into a deep sleep.

I was rudely awakened by my aunt poking my face and whispering “we are here, welcome to your new home!” as I stepped out of the limo onto the driveway of an Oceanside mansion I felt like a star, Aunt Rhonda were escorting me into her beautiful house she then told me since I was starting a new school I had to make a grand impression. She was going to take me out to get a new wardrobe and a new look, a new me as my aunt exclaimed. Walking through the grand doors of her house in the entrance there was a water fountain and in the background five giant windows showing off her ocean backyard. From one day away from a new school I decided to make my way to my new room and get some sleep after a long day’s travel I decided to get some sleep. Walking up the stairs to the upper level of Aunt Rhonda’s mansion. I walked into the guest bedroom with an ocean view, the walls where aqua and the furniture bedding and pillows were white as snow. I threw my bags on the ground and was absorbed by the white fluffy linen.

After a long nights sleep, opening my eyes and seeing the ocean and hearing the waves and smelling the warm salt water was the most peaceful awakening that anyone could have in a lifetime. I had never been in a place so calming. Walking outside onto the balcony and feeling the warm morning sun on my face brought me back to a familiar place. It brought me back to the stage when I was performing. Hearing my name called over and over again almost made the day dream more real but back to reality, even though California was amazing, my heart always belongs to performing. My uncle still calling me said that it was breakfast time, and that I was to make my way downstairs and join my aunt and mother.


Sitting at the table my aunt was telling me about the exciting day that we had ahead. We were going to go to her hair and makeup stylist and then go to her favourite mall by the beach and then mother and uncle were to join us for lunch by the ocean and to see the new me. There was something about her saying ‘the new me’ that made me feel uneasy, do I really want change?
As we my aunt and I were pulling into our first stop, walking out of the hair salon laughing were 5 girls. My aunt then said “those girls are you age, maybe they’ll be in one of you classes when you start school! Do you want to meet them?” being the shy person I am, I told Aunt Rhonda and buried my head into my sweater. My aunt opened the salon door, and them she was approached by a young bleach blond haired man, kissing both cheeks they caught up. My aunt then introduced me and then I was shown to the seat where I would be held for the next who knows how many hours. The young man named Stephan asked me what I wanted done for today, before I could get a word in my aunt started telling him all these fancy terms that I’ve never heard before in my life. Growing up my mom always cut my hair, I feel like an alien with silver foil and cucumbers on my eyes. Not knowing what to expect the ringer went off and Stephan came and took all the foils off. With a big gasp of air, I wanted to start crying. Thinking to myself, I KNEW THIS WAS A BAD IDEA! He then said “ITS A MASTERPICE!” embarrassed by all the attention now set on me, I walked over to the chair and looked at my hair. It had gone from a light brown to a light blond. My aunt walking over and then said, “Oh, you look beautiful. Now you truly fit the look of a ‘California girl’ darling.” Walking Out of the salon I felt like a brand new person, makeup all done and blown out blonde hair. Aunt Rhonda seemed more excited about all the new changes then I was, we then got in the car and put the roof on her Mercedes convertible down and Aunt Rhonda screamed “SHOPPING TIME!”
A block down from the hair salon was a strip of stores, the street was silent. It looked as if there were only four or five people in the stores and they all looked like queens compared to what I was wearing. As we entered the first store the store attendant quickly walked up to Aunt Rhonda and asked her if she wanted any food, or anything to drink. She then asked for a glass of Pink Champagne, I whispered to her Rhonda “what kind of store is this?” she then replied by flailing her arms in the air, “Welcome to my paradise!” As soon as I noticed, I was drinking Chilled orange juice in a wine class, and I had enough clothes to try on that would last a person a year. After spending at least an hour of trying on and modeling all of the clothing that I had tried on, I had chosen out 6 pairs of jeans and 8 shirts along with 4 new cardigans and two sweaters. Making out way up to the till I caught a glimpse of the tag on the jeans it looked like $30! I was astonished and told my aunt that I would put some back, then as we were at the till I got a better look at the prices and the jeans where almost $200 each! I then begged my aunt to let me put some clothed back but she refused and went on saying, “It’s your first day of school in a week darling, you need to make a mighty fine first impression!” Getting into her convertible with an escort holding 4 bags filled with clothes and accessories, I felt like a star. “Thank you Aunt Rhonda, You have done so much for us. I really don’t know how to thank you for all of this”. “Oh Zoe darling, you being here is enough. I haven’t seen you since your little and all this makes up for the time that I’ve missed with my one and only favourite niece.”

After a long day of shopping and all the new changes I unpacked all the new clothes I had gotten and put them into their place in the closet. I dumped on of the bags out onto my bed that was particularly heavy and out fell a new hair straighter, and so much makeup I didn’t know what to do with. I went into the bathroom and washed all the makeup that Stephan from the hairs salons assistant taught me how to put on. I then put my pyjama’s on and crawled into bed. Closing my eyes, I found myself in a deep sleep.

A week had gone by in this paradise they call home, and before I knew it I was getting ready for school. I really hope today goes well; I don’t want to be the new girl again. I just pray God that you’ll send someone special to be my friend. My uncle was calling me down for breakfast just like every morning. My hair was all done, makeup was on the way I was taught to wear it, and a new set outfit that Aunt Rhonda bought me. I walked down the stairs, “You look beautiful darling”, “thank you Aunt Rhonda, it’s all thanks to you. I looked at the time. I had to be at school in 10 minutes. “AUNT RHONDA! IM GOING TO BE LATE FOR MY FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL” she grabbed her keys and I grabbed my breakfast and bag, before I knew it I was getting out of the car. Looking around at my new surroundings I started walking. Into the school, the walls where light brown and had newly painted blue lockers. Man oh man; if Aunt Rhonda were to see the colours of the lockers clash with the walls, each locker would have their own designer. Interrupting my thought on Aunt Rhonda’s picky-ness was a tap on my back, it looked like one of the girls that I had seen a week before at the hair salon, “hey, I’m Samantha! You can call me Sam though, Are you Zoe?”, “Yeah! How’d you know? I’m new; do you have any idea where I get my locker number?” Sam had long flowing brown hair, and green eyes. “Oh my mom who is the counsellor told me to come attempt to find you and give you a little welcoming tour to the school!

After walking around the school that felt like walking around the world, the block one bell rang. “What class are you in first”, Same asked. “Uhmm it looks like I have Science 11 first, “Oh wait!” she ran over and brought a girl over, “Zoe this is Viola, Viola this is Zoe! She’s going to be in your Science class!” Viola looked like the kind of girl that got what she wants whenever she wants, the classic spoilt California girl”, “Viola can you show Zoe to the classroom”. “Yeah for sure!” walking through the halls, I didn’t know what to say to Viola, it was really awkward only hearing your foot steps and nothing else. “here it is, room 209” Viola said. I opened the door and there sitting there was a class full of students I don’t know, this should be fun!




As I was gazing the room for an open seat there were 3 open ones, Viola took the one nearest to the back and that left me with two options. The seat in front next to the window or the one far right in the class room where sat bestride it was a girl with hair that looked like mine but only natural. She looked more of the hippie type, we should get along! Anyways I need more friends to survive this school year as it is. Making my way back to the seat was very awkward weaving my way through the desks with students in them squeezed together. Sitting down, and finally looking to the front of the class everyone was staring. Wow great start to the first year, in my favourite class filled with people I have no idea about. A very short and scruffy looking man made his way around the classroom over to my desk, and crouched down to eye level. “Hi, you must be Zoe! I’m Mr. Wright Welcome to Seaside high school.” With a smug look on his face plopping 3 heavy books onto my desk and walking back to the front of the class was I was starting to take the welcome sarcastically.

“Open up your books class, open your text books to page 23; keep in mind that the sooner you get your work done and into me. The sooner you will be done with this dreaded chapter. Now get your work done so we can all be happy.” The introduction wasn’t very uplifting but what was I to expect. I’m in grade 11 now, only one more year till I graduate and I’m free.

The bell rang after an hour long class that felt like a century had passed it was so long. Oh my goodness, how am I going to survive a whole year with a schedule like this? Looking down at all the notes I had taken in my binder, turning a sharp corner it felt as if I had hit a brick wall. Collapsing to the ground and books flying everywhere, and the bell ringing. How on earth are I going to get all this stuff together, find my locker all over again and my English class? Without looking up I heard a voice “geez could you have gone around that corner any faster”. Taking the comment rudely, “well could you have at least packed on any more steel and then run into me” Finally after gathering up all my belongings and standing up. I was now standing centimetres from a tall buff boy with sandy blonde hair and blue-green eyes. “Hey your Zoe right? I’m in your science class. I’m Cody”, “right your that Viola chicks boyfriend right, she’s a keeper!” “No Viola is not my girlfriend. Well at least not anymore, she just thinks that we are.” The conversation was starting to get awkward. “Hey so what class do you have next” Cody peering over my class schedule. “Oh sweet we both have English together, you’re going to love it! Mr. Tinsley is an amazing teacher.” “Oh joy, well Cody since you seem to know where you’re going, lead the way!”


After two long classes it was finally time for lunch, sitting down over came a tall slim girl with short brown hair plopped down next to me, “you know that white bread tastes a lot better with jam” she randomly proclaimed. I’m Nicole. Your new here right?” “Yes, I’m Zoe”. “Well Zoe your lunch looks very un-appetizing, let me get you something more... Edible?” Before I knew it Viola came rushing over and grabbed my arm. “Oh my you are so lucky I saved you from that freak! You do not want to get involved with that chick”. “Oh, uh okay?” “So Zoe I was thinking. Since your new here, not that many friends new surrounding I came up with a genius idea! Come to a little girls get together this Friday!” “That sounds amazing but I don’t know.” “Oh but it will be a blast you’ll be meeting all of the most amazing girls at seaside! Speaking of that you need to help me find something amazing to wear... Please?” I couldn’t say no. It was a great feeling to have a friend so soon, and Viola out of anyone. “I’ll pick you up after your last block today, meet me out front and off to rodeo drive!” Rodeo drive, what on earth is that?
Soon enough I knew what rodeo drive was, along with Prada, Channel, and coach. Reaching the end of the strip Viola had found a dress along with a new bag and a few other pricey items. “This is impossible, this is the last store and you still have not found anything for yourself Zoe!” “Oh Viola I couldn’t afford the mints at the front if I wanted anything, if you’re ready to go its fine with me, “No Zoe I need something to repay you with for giving me this company, and you’re amazing opinion”. “Seriously Viola I’m glad that you even invited me! You don’t need to buy me off with anything, I had a great time” “Okay if you insist.” Viola whistled for the valet to bring her Corvette around and then we were off home.

“Bye I’ll see you tomorrow Zoe” walking into my Aunts house I was greeted by a warm hug from my mother. “So how was your first day of school? Meet any new friends?”. “Mom today was amazing I met So many new people and friends. They all have so much money though, they have it so easy!” “Well honey some people just don’t know how to appreciate what they have and take something’s for granted.” “Yeah I guess that’s it, anyways I’m super tired. I’m going to go take a nap. Call me down when it’s time for dinner.” “Okay sweetie” kissing my forehead she sent off. Shutting the door to my paradise I opened the door to the balcony so I could head the waves crashing along the sand and smell the salt water.

As the ocean water was crashing into the shore in closed my eyes and felt the cold breeze from the ocean on my face and knew that I was at peace. I was happy. Soon enough my eyes opened to the bright sunlight through the balcony. I had slept through dinner all the way into the next morning. Walking into the bathroom I grabbed a cloth and dampened it with cold water. Dabbing my face and looking into the mirror to examine it. Today I think I’m going to try something new. Grabbing the bag of makeup, and hair curler. After 45 minutes of perfecting my makeup, and curling my almost waist length hair. My hair was filled with waves and had natural brown eye shadow and mascara for makeup. I placed out a pair of black jeans and a peachy pink shirt. Walking downs stairs my aunt and uncle were sitting at the table. Rhonda was eating her gross non fat yogurt with flax seeds, and they had put out a bowl of my favourite cereal. “Honey your friend.. Viola called? She said she wanted to pick you up this morning, so I told her to go ahead. Is it alright if she takes over my job for this morning” “Yea for sure did she say what time she would be here at?” sitting down at the table and pouring the milk into the bowl filled with frosted flakes. “She said that she would be he-.” Aunt Rhonda’s sentence was cut off by the blow of the car horn. Taking in one more spoon full of the milky cereal and grabbing my bag I ran out.
There miss Viola sitting in a black Mercedes. Totally different to the car she was driving yesterday. “ZOE! So great to see you all dolled up. So what do you think, you like? I needed a new change, one to represent a new year” “yeah Viola it’s amazing” “thank you I picked it up this morning on my way to pick you up, and I realised I had some spare time so..” Viola reached into the back seat of the car and grabbed a beautifully packed bag with pink tissue. “Here you go, I couldn’t let you wear whatever else you would have to my little get together this Friday, It’s the least I could do” reaching into the white and pink bag and pulling out the light pink and black lace dress I had tried on yesterday. “Viola you really shouldn’t have” “well I did, you really saved my life yesterday, it’s the least I could do! Anyways you can’t take it back so you have to keep it.” Turning the car on Viola slammed on the Gas and off we went to school.
The day felt like forever, I was so excited for later on that Friday night. Wow meeting a whole group of girls I do not know at all, yeah I’m shy but I wonder what is going to happen. I really hope they’ll all just see the real me. The thought was abruptly interrupted by a group of boys approaching me asking me if I could do any clown tricks for me. Confused I kept on going walking and then a boy asked said, “Hey I’m snowflake, what’s your clown name?” walking away laughing with a group I was concerned and confused. I walked to my locker and started unloading the books that I had brought home the night before.



All of a sudden Sam came up to my locker. “Oh my goodness, I cannot believe her!!” Sam said in a very angry tone. “Excuse me, care to explain I’m so confused!?” Sam pulled her laptop out of her bag and opened a web page. A video popped up of Nicole dressed up as a clown. The video started and she started talking “So as hopefully most of you know, we have a new student! Have you heard? We have a new student, she’s a circus clown! Now I think all of seaside should give her our best clown welcome to this freak!” The video closed and a picture of me dressed in a clown suit and a yellow clown outfit pooped up laughing. I cannot believe this, only 3 days at this new school and I’ve already made enough enemies that I can count on two hands!
Viola ran up, “Oh my goodness Zoe, I am surely going to pay that bag a visit. How rude is that”. The bell rang and it was then time Science. “Viola its okay, she’s in my next class ill talk to her.” “Tell that Martian that I’ll give her a good piece of mind if she doesn’t leave you alone” Viola shouted across the hallway. As all the seats in the class where filling up, I saw Nicole sitting down and quickly slid into the seat next to her. “Hey Nicole, What was with that video. And what did I do to deserve that?”. “Look Zoe, This school is not easy to get situated into, well at least not for me. So when I saw you walking off with viola yesterday it struck a bone in me. “Well if you want friends then that are defiantly a way you’ll get them.” About to get up and move seats but then Nicole grabbed onto my arm. “Please, I’m really sorry. But just don’t let me sit beside myself.” I was gladdened to see that someone actually wanted me to sit with them. The class was long and boring and I`m sure I slept through most of it. I’m really glad that I and Nicole are actually starting to become friends. More friends mean a better year. The thought of a better year made me feel warm inside.
Walking outside the afternoon sun blinded me for a few seconds, looking for Viola I couldn`t seem to get my visuals focused. Then grabbing my books and using them as a visor. “Zoe!! How excited are you for tonight?! I have so much planned! So much to do! Your still in for helping me with set up, right?”, “yeah for sure!” I brought all my stuff with me so I can just change and get ready before the girls come over!”
It seemed like we had been driving for at least a hour through Beverly Hills, after seeing Violas car I was so ready to see the home, or should I say mansion that she lived in. Turning down a private road we came to a giant gate. Viola rolled down her window, “Yes Charley its Viola. Open the damn gate, your keeping the guest waiting.” Letting out a laugh “who in the world is Charley?” “It’s my butler, I swear he’s def.” Driving up the driveway that was practically the width of any other highway the side of the road was covered in tropical plants and flowers. Finally we came to the end of the driveway.

There was two story White house with windows covering the front. It was literally one of the prettiest houses I had ever seen in my entire life! Getting out of the car Viola clicked her still clean car she walked up to the door and it opened without a touch. I turned to the left and saw an old man, “Oh hi! I’m Viola’s friend!” the old man walked away, “Zoe that was Charley not my father. It’s just me and my sister here. Well actually just me for right now!”. “Oh wow, he really is def! Where’s your sister?” “I don’t know, somewhere in East Asia... or was it Europe. I have no idea” walking out to the balcony it overlooked all of LA. “Wow! You can see Venice from here! That’s crazy!”.”Yeah, it’s still I sight I can’t get used to” so anyways let’s find out the food and drinks for tonight, Come in!” Three women came in with a book for different food and drinks. “Oh this looks good! Wild Smoked salmon on a Carrot infused cracker! We’ll get seven of those!” How do people live like this, everything they want at the tip of their finger? I agree with Viola. It’s definitely something that would be difficult to get used to.

An hour passed and we then found ourselves upstairs getting ready, I walked out of the bathroom In the dress that Viola had so graciously bought me. “Oh Zoe you look amazing, but that’s not for tonight. We are keeping things a little causal that’s for my 17th birthday party silly!”. “Well then what am I supposed to be wearing?” “It’s a Pyjama party silly!” Oh well... I didn’t really bring any Pyjamas...” “Oh well that’s alright, second drawer on the left, have your choice!” opening the drawer it turned into a closet. Silk, cotton, pink, red, blue, Viola had every single Type of pyjamas you could imagine! The Door bell rang, “Zoe, I’m going to go downstairs and let the girls in, make your way downstairs when you ready! Hmmm anything I want huh? I grabbed a silk pair of deep purple and black pyjamas. Slipping into them I made my way downstairs and there was 8 girls sitting talking. Viola cleared her through, making it clear that she wanted to announce something. “Everyone this is Zoe, please introduce yourself to her!” looking at all the girls one familiar face was clear in the crowd. “Sam!! I’m so excited to see you here! Actually one person I know! “Yes its super exciting, there’s so much in store for tonight. It’s going to be so much fun!”

“Okay girls. Since the Cops come out earlier and earlier every year, we may as well get this over with” Viola said. Leaning over to Sam “what are we doing?”, “oh well Viola throws one of these parties every year, and she chooses a victim and we go and toilet paper their house.” “Oh okay, well this should be interesting, I wonder who will be the poor victim of our terrible act?”All the girls made their way into two cars. Since the house we had to TP was a ways away. I got into the car in the front by Viola, “Hey VI who are we TPing?”, “oh well you know Cody?” “Yeah!” “Well he’s our victim this year.”



10

Something about TPing Cody’s house made me so excited. Not that I would be talking to him but just getting the chance to see him. Oh no! I can’t be doing this, Viola is practically in love with Cody, and if she ever found out I would be dead meat! After around 10 minutes of driving we reached the house. We all got a handful of toilet paper rolls and made our way outside. It was around midnight so he should be sleeping! We all were all dressed for the occasion ready for our super sleuth act of criminal work.

The girls who where all there got out of the truck and we started making our way up to Cody’s house, I could feel my heart in my throat. I was getting so nervous that he would catch us. The first to go was a girl named Susan. She had short spiked black hair and more piercings that she could count on one finger. She threw the roll of toilet paper in the air and it caught on the green pine tree in the front yard. All the girls joined in, all you could see is spiralling paper in the air and all over the front lawn. I instead had terrible aim so I decided I would rip pieces off and throw them in the bushes. If he catches us or anyone else sees us. We are dead. DEAD MEAT. All of a sudden the porch light flickered on. I was the girl closest to the house, knowing I wouldn’t make it back I ducked into a bush near the pine tree. All the girls scattered for the car down the block. They better not leave me. It was so quite it could hear my heart. Taking slow and steady breaths, making sure whoever is on the other side of the door couldn’t hear me. I could hear the door knob turning. Out walking from the door was Cody, dressed in a black workout pants and a white towel around his neck. “HEY! Who’s out there!? I’m going to call the cops!” Oh no, this is it. I’m going to jail. My life is o-v-e-r.” All of a sudden, the upbeat techno tune blasted from my phone. I didn’t know what to do. I knew he heard my phone. My life is over. I jumped up from out of the bushes in between his door and the pine tree. “HEY! I hear you. YOUR DEAD” Taking my first step for freedom and ran as fast as I could all of a sudden Viola’s truck swerved around the corner and the door flew open “get in, HURRY!” slamming the door on my way in I looked back and saw Cody’s face. I knew he saw me, he knew it was me. The truck was driving away and all I could see was Cody kicking the pile of crumpled up toilet paper on the ground.

We got back to Viola’s mansion and we all gathered into her living room. All the girls were laughing, I was the only one excluded from the pow-wow. Viola approached me “hey cheer up, Cody wont report you, I’ll pay him to keep his mouth shut if i have to”. “It’s not that Vivian. I just feel so terrible, he looked so... Sad?”. “Oh for goodness sake Zoe, grow up. He’s just a boy.”
When Viola said ‘just a boy’ it made me realise. He wasn’t just a boy for me. That’s why I felt so guilty. How Zoe, you’ve only met this boy once, now all of a sudden you’re in love. Why do you always do this to yourself! Viola is your friend. You cannot do that to her.

11
It was getting late, everyone had avocado face masks on and we were all sitting around in a circle asking each other question. Gazing off in though I heard my name, “So Zoe got the hots for anyone?” “Are you kidding me, I would have to answer a negative to that one.” A girl with bright red hair shouted across the circle “O common Zoe! We all saw the way you were staring at Cody!” I could feel my heart beet speed up! Vivian can’t know. She was staring at me with that face of rage but a face that wasn’t very readable. But I could translate it. She was getting angry i had to make a quick response; our friendship can end so soon! “Are you serious? I barley know the kid. He’s defiantly not my type anyways.” I looked over at Viola and she had a smirk on her face, I then returned the gesture. Vivian then went on “okay Zoe it’s your turn, ask one of us anything!” “Okay” it took me a while to think of an honest to god question. All the girls were waiting with anticipation; I could see it in their eyes. I panicked and said the first thing that came to mind, “Viola, are you a virgin?” all the girls gasped. Did i say something wrong? Oh I shouldn’t have been so straight forward my life is-
the girls let out a giant laughter “Zoe, what kind of question is that? Obviously not. Did you not see me sneak into Cody’s house? Why did you think he took so long to go to the door?” I let out a sarcastic laugh “oh ahaha I knew that, excuse me please” getting up I went as fast as I could upstairs into Viola’s room, and grabbed my torso. The disappointment and the rage. I didn’t know how to handle it all. I dropped to my knees trying so hard not to cry, the girls would have been able to tell something was up.
I was laying on the ground in the washroom thinking,
I don’t understand how someone could do something like that so carelessly, I’ve only been in one serious relationship and it hadn’t even gone that far. But I don’t understand why I’m getting so emotional about this! I barley know the kid and I’m already sobbing like a freak. I guess this whole experience has been overwhelming and this was just the time to let it all out.

I heard some of the girls cheering downstairs, deciding to finally get up and make my way down stairs. I looked in the mirror. Oh my goodness. Look at my face, no makeup, and frizzy hair. This is it, my cover is blown. And once again, thinking about how my life is over. Making my way down stairs I saw Viola looking at me. “Oh my god, it looks like you got run over a train! Are you okay? You didn’t stink my washroom up did you, I do not want to deal with those sanitary people again, they just do not understand!”. “Yeah I’m fine. I just... Uh... have a really bad migraine, have any aspirin I can take?”. “Yeah for sure in the kitchen!”







12
The journey from room to room would be an uncomfortable journey; I really hope she doesn’t bring up Cody. “So Zoe, I just want to reassure, you don’t have any feelings for Cody right? I just saw your face when I brought him up”. Panicking I scrambled for something to say. “You know how you were saying how it stank? Well that ginger who was sitting beside me let one rip! It was so repulsive! And Cody? Are you serious, I really have no feelings, or any want to even get to know him! So please don’t worry”. “OH MY GOODNESS, what a b****. I defiantly made it clear about the rules in this house. All the gases you bring in. Stay in until you leave out the front door! Oh she’s going to get it that’s for sure.” Oh what have I done?

Thankfully Viola got distracted by the juice spilt on her white as snow carpet and forgot to mention anything about my little fib. All the girls went on and brushed their teeth, washed the face masks off the cemented faces and got into bed. Even though it was ten, I was really happy to see that the night was practically over. The pressure was over. I closed my eyes and before I knew it I was in a deep sleep, all though the ground didn’t compare to my bed at Aunt Rhonda’s house it was a lot better than nothing.

My sleep was abruptly disrupted by the sound of a... Air horn!? By the time I opened my eyes there standing around the room was 12 boys. And one of them was Cody, I covered my sleepy pale, and makeup-less face under the blankets and looked at my phone for the time, 1am!? Are you serious, WHY ARE THEY HERE?! How did they get in? All of a sudden I heard Vivian’s voice, “glad you boys decided to join the party!” a familiar deep voice started talking, “well I got to thank you guys somehow for the beautiful re-decoration on my front yard some way!” Oh my gosh, It’s Cody! He saw. Me! He knows I’m here! I got up with the blanket on top of my head, I had to get upstairs and put something on my face and something appropriate on top. As I was running up I heard someone say “I got the booze.”

Booze, as in alcohol. Illegal substances that make girls turn into sluts, and sluts into bionic women of all sluts. I can’t deal with it. What am I going to do, what am I going to say if someone tries to get me to drink something? They are all going to make fun of me, but I know I’m not ready for this kind of pressure; it’s just way too much. I just hope to God that I don’t turn into one of those girls whose lives are ruined because of stupid mistakes. I’m a performer, not an alcoholic.





13


Walking down the stairs, I was so nervous, the music was on and people where dancing, there were a few girls with beer bottles in their hand, and others with Vodka bottles in their hand. I didn’t know what to expect, hoping all the alcohol was gone. Viola came up to me, “now isn’t this a party!?” “Yeah sure is” I said in a sarcastic voice. But Viola didn’t quite pick up on the sarcasm. “Oh my! Here you want some beer?’ this was it this is what I had been avoiding, then I saw Cody walking by me with a beer in his hand and a big grin directed to me, “yeah for sure!” why oh why, Zoe, what are you doing to yourself, trying to impress a boy. Viola brought over the beer and placed it in my hand. “Here you go! Bottoms up!” I perched my lips against it so none of the alcohol could enter my mouth. Wiping the Beer of my lips and walking outside. I sat down on the chair and put the beer on the table. That was close, but I’m glad I at least made it look like I was fitting in. I guess I just didn’t want to be pressured so instead I just pretended to go with the crowd and wasn’t bugged. All of a sudden walking through the door and sitting down next to me was Cody.
“Hey little miss not-so sneaky, you owe me big time for that mess”. “I’m so sorry; I honestly didn’t want anything to do with it!” Cody replied in a apologetic tone, “Nah don’t worry about it, they do the same prank every year on my house, I just don’t think Viola gets it through her mind that it doesn’t bug me that much” I was so upset, How could he be saying this when only hours ago they were playing tonsil hockey and probably many other things I don’t want to hear about. I had to say something, “Says the guy who was sleeping with her during the master plan...”. “Me? Sleeping with Viola?” Cody let out a laugh. “Every time Viola even tries to get near my house I go into hiding, that girl is insane!” “Wait... So you didn’t sleep with her??”. “Zoe of course I didn’t, and out of all innocent people you asking me this, really?” I was angered at the thought of him thinking I’m innocent, well I am but it almost feels like he is referring to me as a little girl. “Excuse me Mr. know it all, why are you accusing me of being this ‘innocent little girl’?” Cody snapped quickly to answer the question, “No I don’t mean you as a little girl at all, But I did see you dump that beer out. I think it’s really cool that you have that kind of self control and loyalty to yourself, there aren’t many like you. You’re a one of a kind Zoe” Cody said with a smirk on his face. Shivers crept up my spine, that sweet smile. NO ZOE, you cannot do this. Just get up and walk away. Ohhh that smile. “I’m a pre” I stopped. I don’t want anyone knowing about my past, “I’m a pretty anti social person aren’t I, sitting out here by myself?” “Well Zoe, let me introduce you to the gang.” When we both got up, our faces were barley apart, he was about to lean in and kiss me, but I then nervously walked away talking like I didn’t notice.

The night... or should I say, the morning went by very fast. Cody introduced me to a lot of new people; I am really starting to like this place. Most of the girls who were originally at Viola’s party were sleeping on the ground in her room. And then the others were either passed out on the ground, or passed out in one of the several spare bedrooms with an accomplice of the opposite sex. I was laying on my back thinking to myself while the others were in a deep sleep.




14
Wow, what a night! I cannot believe how this week has been going. I actually feel like I’m apart of something, like I actually belong. But what was with Viola telling us that she slept with Cody, did she feel threatened or was she just scared of not being accepted. Of course I wanted to mention something to her, but I don’t want any conflicts at the moment, not a week into school. That’s alright, isn’t it?
I heard someone coming in the door, I looked over the railing. It was the chef, with a box of Advil and some sort of vegetable juice blender. He plugged it in and it made a loud sound. Eventually everyone was awake and ready to get their sardine egg broccoli and rutabaga juice, AKA the ultimate hangover remedy. Everyone made their way to the chef with a glass. I was panicking, If I don’t drink this then they must know something is be up, I have to just act hangover and deal with it; it can’t taste that bad. I was the next one up; the chef took my glass and filed It up with the clumpy dark red juice. Viola came up to me, “this stuff in genius it’s a definite life saver, take a sip... go on” I took a sip. Something was coming up. I ran as fast as I could to the washroom and let’s just say that the sardine surprise didn’t taste any better the second time. I made my walk of shame back into the front room Viola obnoxiously made an open remark “whoa you must have had it bad last night, that’s a first. Can’t wait to see what you’ll be like then” oh my, another party I have to doge, this shall be interesting.

My aunt picked me up and didn’t say a word. I didn’t want to try and start a conversation with her just because I didn’t want to spark anything, it was awkward. The silence, something I haven’t heard in a while. I thought I would catch up on my sleep so I closed my eyes and started to dream. It felt like only minutes before my aunt pulled the car into the front lot as we arrived back at her house. I walked into the front room, something about the environment of the house felt very gloomy. My mom wasn’t anywhere to be found. My aunt had made her way up into her bedroom and my uncle was sitting on the sofa reading the news paper. The phone started to ring, “Zoe darling would you mind answering that for me?”, “Yeah for sure!” I felt kind of awkward answering the phone, “Hey Zoe its Cody, do you want to give me a chance at teaching you how to surf?”, “Cody I would really love to but something is going on at home and I think I need to get to the bottom of it, maybe next time okay?”, I could hear the disappointment in his voice “Yeah that’s alright, Next time!”
I hung the phone up, “it’s okay, the phone was for me” I said as I was running up the stairs to my bedroom, I walked into my room and headed right for the balcony, I wanted to sit out and feel the ocean breeze on my face; and just relax after that excitement filled night. Sitting on the chair with my eyes closed. I heard voices coming from the level below me, I tried to make out what the two mystery people where but I could hear them over the crashing waves only meters away from us. I poked my head out very cautiously and made sure they couldn’t see me. Seeing who it was it felt as if a great force of anger and sadness pushed my towards my bed, I just wanted to scream. Inside me I was, WHY OH WHY. It’s not fair, why questioning how my mom could do this, how could she see that terrible person who abandoned us. It was my dad.

I raced down the stairs headed straight for my mother’s room, I slammed the door open causing it to make a loud bang when it hit the wall. “I was right, I did see you! Mom what is he doing here?”. “Honey me and your father”, “he is not my father, a father does not abandon a child, his wife, in their time of need.” “We have been talking, Trust me honey. We have talked it over a lot, and we are getting back together. Your father found a few performers who are willing to come move out here. And we both have decided on a facility to use for training. “Are you serious? You just expect me to do whatever you say, without even asking me”. I ran upstairs back into my room, and buried my face into my cold pillow, Of course I want to perform again, but I don’t understand. We were perfectly fine without him here and we could have preformed again. But why did he leave us and randomly decide to make his way out across the country and bombard his way back into our lives. I feel into a deep sleep and had a terrible night terror. I came to school dressed as a clown and everyone was laughing and making fun of me. I’m so worried I’ll get judged by my friends but what would they really think if they knew the real me? I lifted my head from my tear drenched pillow, all I wanted to do is run away. I didn’t have anyone to talk to felt so alone. I knew for a fact that I didn’t want to face this alone. I grabbed my coat and went down the stairs Aunt Rhonda, Uncle, dad and mom were all sitting around the coffee table laughing like nothing that happened. It hurt how neglected I felt at that moment, my mom yelled “Hey Zoe come join us”. I didn’t stop; I headed right for the door. I needed to get out of that house and get some fresh air.
Walking along the road every time a car drove past me a gust of wind hit me and felt like it went right through my body. It seemed like I had been walking forever. The sun was still high up in the sky as if it were a summer day. A head of me I saw a park that was right on the ocean. 5 minutes later I was sitting on a bench looking at the soothing waves. Hundreds of feet in the air above where the side of the mountain meets the solid ground covered in white sand.
I wonder what would happen if I jumped, well obviously I know what would happen, but what would people think? How would people react, I’ve only been here for a few weeks, it’s not like I’ve had the kind of connection with people that they would mourn for years about it. I’ve never even be able to live on the edge. Inside me, I do want to jump. But I don’t want to. I wonder if just walking to the edge would be enough, just feeling that life of death situation.
I walked just close enough that my big toe was touching the edge, and then I sat down. Something inside me felt at peace, like I knew that I was in the right mind and I’m not that crazy that I would actually do something like that. Like imagine how crazy people would think I was if they saw me right now. Just as that thought it, a siren went off. Someone on a projector was talking “Miss please step away from the edge, you’re in good hands just don’t jump.” I let out a laugh “Ahahha No sir, I’m not going to jump it’s okay, I was just sitting down to get a closer look at the bottom you don’t need to worry.” I got up and a lady let out a scream, I lost my balance. I was falling backwards. I’m going to die, I’m so stupid how I could do this to myself, my family, and my friends. I closed my eyes.




16
I opened my eyes and it was blurry. Oh my goodness, I’m dead. My vision cleared up and I saw the same police officer and a boy with black spiked hair wearing a wet suit. Tears filled my eyes, I knew that I was safe but I was so overwhelmed. My whole body was numb from shock, I didn’t understand. I took a big gasp of air and all my senses came back to life. “Are you okay, do you feel any pain, can you tell me your name?” I tried so hard to talk but I couldn’t. I was so overwhelmed. More sirens came and before I knew it I was strapped into a stretcher and in an ambulance. Next to me was the boy who I assume saved my life? I wanted to talk to him but I was still in shock.
Thank God. I’m still alive.
I closed my eyes and fell asleep. I woke up finding myself in a hospital room hooked up to IV, My throat was dry, I looked around to see a nurse and to my astonishment I saw the same boy who was in the ambulance with me sitting in the chair next to my bed. “Do you need some water?” I shook my head, he left out the room and I examined my body looking for cuts bruises or missing limbs. I was intact; I cleared my throat right on time for the boy to walk in with a glass full of water. I grabbed it from his hand, took a sip that turned into the glass ending up empty. “Thank you so much, OH THANK GOD IM NOT A MUTE” and threw my hands in the air, “OR A CRIPPLE!!” “The tan boy with black spiked hair let out a chuckle. “How are you feeling?” “I feel great, what happened?” “funny thing is I saw the whole thing, everyone was convinced you where suicidal but I saw you sitting with your feet hanging over the edge and then a lady screamed and I guess it startled you and you lost your balance, I was only a few feet next to you and grabbed your wrist, and you hit your head and passed out!”, “Oh my gosh, I cannot believe how stupid I can be. But thank you so much, you literally saved my life. What’s your name?”. “it’s no problem, I always wanted to be able to say that I’ve saves someone’s life. And my name is Zac”. “Well there you go, I always wanted to fall off the side of a mountain and almost die” he looked at me strangely, “kidding! But Zac I owe you big time, really thank you!”
I looked deep into his eyes, and there was a moment of silence. I could feel my heart pounding, and I really had no idea. The moment was put on hold as my Mom and Dad rushed into the hospital room, Mom looking like she was on a mission. “Oh honey, are you okay, what in the world happened?” she said in a consoling tone. “I’m fine mom, I don’t really want to talk about it but may I put someone on the spot, this is Zac. He saved my life and I would literally be dead if he wasn’t there I would be dead.”, “thank you so much kid” My dad said with a slight grin on his face, “Well me and your father are going to check you out of the hospital and we are on our way, them exiting the hospital room leaving Zac and I alone again. “Hey Zoe, there is a bonfire going on a few blocks away. Do you want to come?”, “Yeah that would be fun!”






17

My parents checked me out of the hospital room, “Hey mom, I’m going to go hang out with Zac, and I’ll be home later on.” Then off Zac and I went. The sun was still up in the sky, but instead of light blue the sky was a soft pink. The sun was getting ready to set. We reached the beach that Zac was taking me to and there were around 12 kids sitting on logs around a bonfire. I felt kind of awkward with all the people who I had no idea about, “I’ll be right back, I got to go grab my guitar out of my car. Just sit back, and get to know everyone!” I was sure sitting there, looking down at my nails. All the girls there were all friends. “Hi!” a girl with bright pink hair greeted me, “How are you?” “I’m good, you know. Just chilling, how are you”. “I’m good, you must be the girl who came with Zac am I right?”, “Yeah how did you know?” “He texted me telling me you were coming, you know this is a big surprise, Zac doesn’t normally hang around with girls! You must be mighty special”, “Oh uh, yeah sure?” Zac ran back with a leather guitar case and plopped down on the log beside me and flashing his adorable smile. I turned away and pretended to look at the water so he couldn’t see my cheeks turn red. “So what exactly is this, do you guys just get together every weekend?” “Yeah well we all like to just hang out and live life to the fullest you know?”

We were all sitting on the log and then I felt Zac scoot closer to me, His warm body heat radiating onto me. We had been eating smores and my hands were all sticky, Hey guys, I’m going to go wash my hands in the water, please don’t do anything exciting without me”, they all let out a chuckle, “I’ll join you!” Zac said, I was getting nervous I could feel my heart beating fast, not knowing what to expect. It was dark out, I couldn’t really see anything except for the lit up fires along the beach. I made it to the water’s edge and placed my sticky hands into the cold water. “so how are you enjoying tonight?, “it’s really fun, these are a great group of people.”, “Yeah they are really extraordinary, I’ve known them all since grade 5, and we have just been growing up together since then. Most of us don’t go to the same schools, so we made a deal to all meet here and hang out every weekend!”, “That’s really great. I wish I had that kind of friendship with people here!”, “well what elementary school did you go to, I wouldn’t be surprised if I knew someone you did growing up in this area, “Oh well I actually just moved here from Rhode island a few weeks ago!”, “Oh I see!” we were now sitting on the soggy sand, I didn’t care if my pants where getting wet, I was sitting beside this gorgeous man and there was barley inches away from us. He put his arm around me and started stroking my leg with the other. “Why do girls shave their legs? It’s so strange, don’t your legs get cold from lack of hair?” He laughed, “Well we do so boys like you can keep us warm” I nuzzled my Head into the side of his shoulder and wrapping my arms around his waist. It was silent but it wasn’t awkward or anything, it was probably the most enjoyable moment I have had the whole time I was there. I really had never been so forward with any boy in my entire life, but there was something about the moment that made it feel so easy going, I kissed the side of his neck. He turned his face towards mine, he didn’t kiss me. But looked into my eyes and said, “I knew that there was a reason for saving you. Seconds after his warm lips were pressed against mine.






18
I pulled away, I didn’t want things getting too carried away, considering the fact that I only met this guy hours before. “Whoa, that was sudden.”, “Oh I’m sorry I didn’t mean to come onto you like that”. “No, no it’s okay. I’m really happy that you did, but I think that I should actually get to know you.” I let out a chuckle. “Yeah I would like that, tomorrow would you like to go out for some snow cones?”, “For sure! But... what are snow cones?” he had a straight look on his face, “you don’t know what snow cones are?” I felt as if I had been missing out on the world from his facial reaction, “no...”, “well you indeed are going to taste the best thing in the world tomorrow, now it I don’t know what kind of people your parents are, but I am guessing your curfew is a little bit before 2am. I’ll drive you home.” We walked back avoiding the Zac’s group of friends hand in hand. We finally made it to an old beat up blue jeep with no roof or doors, “this is kind of sketchy”, “eh don’t worry, no more than 3 people have died in this thing” he laughed and flashed his heart melting smile. He started up the engine and started driving; he placed his hand on top of mine enter laced his fingers around mine and stroked my hand is thumb. I told him all the wrong directions so that the drive home could somehow last forever. After circling the whole city we finally made it to Aunt Rhonda’s house. “I’ll see you later Zo!” I panicked, I didn’t know if I should kiss him or not, so I got out of the car and waved my hand back at him. Why did you do that, seriously Zoe? You have this hunk of hotness in the car who wants to kiss you. I heard the engine of his car start again. Well I guess I lost that chance and wonderfulness... Then startling me he grabbed my shoulders and turning me around saying “where do you think you’re going?” and placed his hands on the head and kissed me like no guy had ever before. “I’ll see you tomorrow” as he walked away, I felt weak in the knees. My brain was thinking a thousand things at the same time, and my heart was beating a thousand beats per a minute I walked inside and walked up to my room. Everyone was sleeping, I sunk into my bed, and all I could do is smile. I didn’t bother putting my Pyjamas on or brushing me teeth, I just snuggled into my bed and hoped for tomorrow to come faster.
What a movie moment, I never would have thought that something like that would happen to me. I used to watch those sappy romantic movies that made everyone feel so alone hoping that every guy that sweeps a girl of her feet will be the guy for them forever. Not claiming that Zac will be. But I never would have imagined that something so romantic could happen to the circus freak, what am I going to tell Viola? Am I. Oh no... What am I going to tell Cody?

As soon as I knew it, I was fast asleep. I woke up and looked at my clock. It was 7am. Thank God we had the day off from school because the teachers were striking. At least they get paid to go to school AND PUT US THROUGH TORTURE. Well I really wouldn’t be disappointed if it lasted forever. I got up and did my daily hair and makeup routine and made sure I was perfect this morning, because that’s all I wanted for today to be, Perfect. Even more perfect then the night before.
I came down stairs wearing a new shirt and acid washed shorts. I grabbed an apple and decided to go down to the beach. Sitting on the white sand and soaking the morning sun in and the fresh salt water spraying on my face I was imagining me back on the stage. My cell phone rang. It was Viola, “hey” her voice sounded shaky. “Hey Viola what’s up?”... There was a pause, “hello Viola? Are you there?”, “Zoe I’m pregnant.”, “What?! Whose baby is it? Are you going to keep it?”. “It’s Cody’s... and I haven’t talked to him yet, he doesn’t even know, I don’t even know what to do, if I should keep it or not, this is just way too crazy!”. “Viola, Cody told me he didn’t sleep with you the night we toilet papered his house... and then tried to kiss me.”. “Well obviously he did. I don’t just sleep with random guys, who do you believe? Him or me?”, “I don’t know Viola, I’m confused as well... do you want me to come over?”, “I’m having another party tonight. And I think I’m going to break the news to Cody, just so it’s less awkward getting together with him alone. And he probably wouldn’t even be willing to hang out with me if it wasn’t a party environment, but anyways I got to sort things out. The party starts at 7:00pm you better be there its formal so wear the beautiful black dress I bought you, and wear a pair of hot heals!” without even being able to answer she hung up the phone, I am so confused right now. I’m being told two different things by two different people I trust, Should I really trust them?

All of a sudden the door bell rang. Well so much for that relaxing morning on the beach. I opened the door and there was a pile of rose peddles on the ground, and arrows pointing to Zac’s car. He smiled and waved. I shouted “I’m just going to grab my bag” He put both thumbs up and I ran up the stairs on all fours, into my room and grabbed my backpack made out of jeans, and sprayed a few sprits on perfume on myself running down the stairs and slamming the door on my way out, Everyone was still in bed so I left a note on the table saying I would be gone for the day. I jumped into the old jeep and off we went, on another crazy adventure.





















20

Driving down the highway with the roof down the wind was blowing in my hair and the radio cranked. We were singing at the top of our lungs, I bet anyone who saw us thought we were on drugs. We had been driving for around half an hour along the coast; it was so beautiful just something about that moment made me feel so happy inside. I turned to Zac and looked at him and he turned his head and looked at me and smiled. Oh boy that smile made me melt over and over again. He swerved the car and then focused on the road again both of us laughing. He took the next exit and pulled into a parking lot. Here we are. He put the jeep into park, “wait here”. He Ran around the car and opened my door, grabbing my hand for support as If I where the Queen. “Thank you, peasant” I snarled acting as bratty princess. Both of us were laughing. We walked to the beach and he grabbed my hand. My heart started beating a thousand miles an hour, I pulled him closer. “Welcome to the best place on earth”, “I thought we were going for snow cones?” “That’s for after, were going surfing first!”... “Surfing, you’re joking right?” “Of course not! Common let’s get going!” I was thinking of an excuse to refrain myself from majorly embarrassing myself, not on my first official date with Zac. “I don’t have a swim suit! I can’t get in the water in my clothes!”. “Lucky for us, my parents own the surf shack here, so we get dibs on wet suits and boards!” He grabbed a handful of keys out of his back pocket and took the lock of the front door of the multi coloured surf shack, “The girls change room is in the back, I’ll see you out there rock star!” He winked, and ran towards the water.
After fussing over my hair and trying to make everything perfect it was all to be washed away. I’m going to fall, on my face, and embarrass myself somehow. I’m terrible on my feet. I bet he’s expecting some amazing surfer out of me.
I slipped on the black and blue full body wet suit and walked out of the change room, looking out onto the horizon there was Zac riding the waves like some pro surfer that you would only see on TV. I turned to my left and saw a pink surfboard with a note taped onto it saying ‘see you out there cutie!” I ripped the note off and stacked the surfboard on top of my head. Walking there taking as much time away from this soon to be embarrassing surf lesson, my toes reached the water. Entering the cold water I knew that it was to be quite the painful experience. I laid on the board and started paddling into the deep ocean. After what it seemed like an hour of paddling. I reached Zac, “so I hope you know that I have never done this in my entire life right”, “Yeah I assumed. You should have seen your face when I broke you the news, you looked like a frog.” He laughed, I didn’t see any humour in the comment, “Look I’m sorry for that comment, it was totally out of context. But anyone who comes to California must go surfing. Trust me”, “it’s okay, I just don’t want to look like a major fool when you see me bail...” It went silent; I could tell he was in the zone. “There! A smallish wave is coming in. Just pop up onto the board and keep your balance. If anything goes wrong jump off the board and call for me, I’ll come save you.” He smiled. The wave was right behind me, I was paddling as fast as I could. I jumped up on two feet and rode the wave in. I hear him yelling “Look at that natural!”




21
Time had flown by so fast. It really was amazing, and turns out I didn’t completely embarrass myself. Besides the few times I fell off. Zac and I were laying on our boards looking at the sky, “you know Zoe, I think it was fate that made us meet, I really have never met anyone like you. You’re beautiful, funny, and smart. Even though it’s only been like what? 24 hours? I can already feel myself falling for you.” “I feel the same way, you know. I don’t know what brought us together, but I owe you my life. Because you kind of saved it.” I smiled and looked into his eyes. We both leaned in to kiss each other but fell off out board into the water. I screamed and we both laughed. I put my arm over the board to keep my head out of the water, he swam over and put both of his arms under mine, and grabbed the board behind me and passionately kiss me. It was silent. But the moment was perfect. “I can feel your heart beat” he laughed. “Yeah well it’s all thanks to you, anyways. I’m glad this is the first time you’ve heard it. Every time I’m with you I can’t control it.” We both smiled. “I think it’s about time we head in. I can’t feel my toes” he said. We both paddled into shore.
After the long excursion we reached the shore. “Hey I’ll be right back. Don’t move!” I sat waiting wondering what was to happen next. Then Zac came out with a blanket and 2 cones filled with ice. “Here you go!” he placed one of the cold cones in my hand. “What exactly are these?” putting the blanket around me and jumping down next to me. “You really can’t figure it out? The cone? The ‘snow’ on top?”. “Oh ahaha it’s a snow cone!” I said stupidly. “Well I didn’t know that they would be... blue green and red? That’s so random! Where in the world did these come from anyways?” “We have a machine in the surf shop”. “Oh okay, I see now. So are you the professional surfer that makes the best snow cones in California or what?” We both laughed, Zac put his arm around me and the moment reminded me of the night we first kissed. “Hey do you have the time? “Yeah its 6:44pm, why?” Jumping up as fast as I could. “Oh shoot! I’m supposed be somewhere fifteen minutes, and I’m covered in salt and sand!” “it’s okay ill get you home as soon as possible. Do you want me to drop you off?”, “yes oh my goodness that would be fantastic.” Kissing him as fast as I could and running back to the jeep.
The ride back to my house was filled with laughter, And mimicking cartoon characters. We reached my house and I ran as fast as I could into the shower. I got up and applied my makeup as fast as I could; slipping on the little black dress that Viola had bought me. Combing my hair on the way down the wet locks would soon turn into curls. Thank God Aunt Rhonda has the same size foot as me. I came across a pair of ruby red heals I was attempting to run back into the jeep in. “okay where exactly are you going dressed like that, This is not fair to me to have you look so hot and not be with me” With his jaw looking like it was about to fall off I kissed him. “Pick me around 10, and you’ll get me for the rest of the night!”, Giving Zac all the right directions to Viola’s house, after finally getting there and being 30 minutes late I jumped of Zac’s old jeep and he threw me my purse, running in. I turned around and ran back to the jeep and gave him a kiss. “I better see you later miss!” I took off my shoes and ran to Viola’s door. I then put the shoes back on and knocked vigorously on the door. Someone answered that I had never met before. “Hi”.

The whole room was filled with dancing people, jumping up and down seeing if I could find Viola. I was walking through the crowd and finally saw Viola, “oh my God how many people did you invite? The whole school? It’s packed in here. I can barley breath!”, “yeah well this is going to be the party to end all party’s! Here some chilled apple cider, she placed the gold can of ‘chilled apple cider’ but it was clearly beer. I placed it on the table and stated to look around for someone I knew. Then someone covered my eyes with a blind fold and grabbed my hips and led me up some stairs and I heard a slamming door behind me. “Okay Viola, if this is some sort of trick I’m not interested.” I took the blind fold off and didn’t see Viola. “Cody what are you doing?”, “well since you bailed on surfing with me I thought that we should just hang out up here. Alone.” “I don’t think I’m conformable with that Cody...” he then pushed me onto the bed and took off my shoes. Trying to squirm away nothing was working. He then removed his shirt and attempted to kiss me. I could smell the alcohol in his breath. I slapped him and then made a run for the door and he grabbed the shoulder of my dress and ripped it. I opened the door and ended up in the washroom. I had to wait there till he was gone, Then all of a sudden heard giggling then eventually something that turned into a lot more than that.
I heard the door shut and slowly came out from the room, the first sight I saw was Cody putting his shirt on. “Damn girl, you really missed out.”, “You are repulsive. I cannot believe you.” I grabbed my shoes and started putting them on. I walked down the stairs in front of everyone with Cody smiling behind me with his shirt undone and a sick grin on his face as if he had caught some sort of prize. I went into one of the quietest corners I could find and called Zac. The phone answered. “Hey Zoe, what’s up?”, “I think I am ready to be picked up.” My voice was shaky, “yeah for sure... is everything all right?” “Yeah everything is fine!” I hung up the phone and turned around. And saw Viola. “Hey Viola I really need to talk to you. “I cannot believe you, I trusted you.”, “Viola what do you mean?” “You know what you did. After everything that happened I cannot believe you slept with him.”, “what Viola I didn’t sleep with anyone I don’t know what you’re talking about!?” The room went silent. “You are a whore, and a waist of space on the earth”, she threw her cold beer in my face. The guy standing beside her yelled. “YEAH!” and dumped his drink on my head. “I never want to see your face again.”, “GET OUT OF MY HOUSE! NOW!” she was pointing to the door. I was holding back the tears and ran for the door. The tears were pouring out of my eyes. I didn’t bother for Zac to arrive I just started walking. Not knowing what way was home in the dark. I ran with my impulse and finally reached back home. I ran in the door and didn’t even make contact, “honey we have good news!” I just ran into my room ignoring them and curled up in a ball. It felt like there was a giant pit in the middle of my stomach.
I know I didn’t do anything wrong. I can’t believe that she didn’t even trust me enough to believe me. And she just expects that if she does anything wrong that it just flies by and doesn’t affect anyone. And even Cody, I Thought he was the only real person here. Looks like he’s like everyone else. Pigs who escaped from the pig sty that’s all they are.



23
I walked into the washroom and looked at my face. My makeup had run down my checks and met my neck. My hair frizzy and sticky with the stench of alcohol, and I had burses on my arms from when Cody attacked me. I got in the shower and rinsed all the sticky alcoholic drinks out of my hair and washed my face clean of makeup and salty tears. I slid on some of the warmest pair of pyjamas and opened the balcony door to let the fresh air into my muggy room. I put a pair of head phones in my ears to let music lying on my bed staring at the ceiling my eyes filled with tears. Tears of hurt, confusion, and pain. Nothing like that had ever happened to my before. I sat up and grabbed my phone and called Star. “Hey star” I could hear my voice begging to get shaky, “Zoe are you okay, I know you and you don’t sound okay.” I vented to her for almost an hour, telling her about California, my new home. Zac and what had happened that night. The conversation ended around 3:00am and it was time to go to bed. “Thank you Star, I really miss you. And I cannot wait to see you again.” “Love you, and I better hear from you soon! Goodnight Zoe!” I hung up the phone and snuggled into the cold blankets and fell into a deep sleep. I was woken up at 7am. “Wake up my dear! Your dad found a new facility and we are back to training this morning. Put your clothes in and we are off in ten minutes. After only having 4 hours of sleep I dragged my feet and went into the washroom and put my hair up, and put my training clothes on. On my way out of my room I grabbed my phone turned it on. Missed alerts and missed calls fled through the screen. 23 missed calls from Zac, 82 unread texts from Zac.
Oh no, he was going to pick me up from Viola’s party. I just left; I really hope he wasn’t sitting there for too long...
Reading through the worried texts from him in the car with my mom and dad on the way to the facility we were training in. I feel like such a terrible person. I texted him a text that read ‘hey, I have to talk to you. Can you pick me up at home around 3:00pm?’ The next 5 minutes waiting for a text back from him where so nerve wracking. Then my phone buzzed. I got a text back saying ‘wow your actually alive. That time would work well because I have some things to talk to you about as well’
What does he need to talk to me about? I hope I didn’t do anything to make him never want to see me again.
After a ten minute drive we finally reached the facility. Walking in, I saw a giant red silk hanging in front of me. It was like my baby, I wanted to go jump on it and hug it. It made me so happy that I am once again reunited. “So honey, we have a show next week for a young girls 17th birthday party, so make a hell of a routine. There will be a lot of very important people there, You need to make this the best you can, something that will really read to the audience. The theme of the party is masquerade. So be ready for some unusual faces!” He let out a laugh, “now get to work, you only have one week to make this perfect.

Stretching my arms and legs I then walked towards the shiny silk and started climbing. It was only me in the room. There was no crowd or pressure. It was just me and the silk. After 3 hours, the most beautiful routine I had ever made was then preformed and approved by my father. My dad clapped “where did all this come from? That was amazing!”, “well I guess I have just had a lot of inspiration and feelings built up inside.”, “well it’s a great routine but since the show is only in a week, and you have been off the silk for a while, I want you to clear your whole schedule this week and work on this routine to make it even more perfect then it is, so if school does end up starting again. I’ll give your principal a ring and let him know what’s going on!” The fact that I hadn’t really told anyone about my past would make it even more difficult if they knew what I did in my spare time. Not knowing what people would think of it would make things difficult to explain, I don’t want to have to be judged by people based on what I love. To me I think that it would just be better people not knowing. “It’s time to make our way back home. You’re mother and I are going to have a meeting with the client, so we can drop you off at home unless you want to come?” “No its okay dad, I have a little bit of a meeting myself.”
I got home and repeated my usual morning routine, went downstairs and had a wonderful fruit salad waiting for me. Even though it was more of a brunch it was just what I needed. The door bell rang, “Come in! The door is open!” Zac walked in and ran towards me and wrapped his arms around me, and kissed me on the cheek. “You do know I thought you were dead right?”, “I’m so sorry. I had a really rough night.” Going on telling him the whole story, “who is this Cody character? He had no right to do that to you. He needs to own up to what he did. Because you didn’t deserve any of that.”, “look Cody I know what happened. I’m not going to go run after the situation. What’s done has been done; Viola doesn’t deserve an explanation because she doesn’t deserve me as a friend. She ruined our friendship, and I don’t want it to be mended. Not after what she did to me, I don’t even want to go back to school and face that embarrassment”, “I understand.” The instant he flashed his smile, the whole situation was off my mind. “Well since your here do you want me to show you around the house?”, “yeah sure that would be nice. Ending with my bedroom we were both laying on my bed comparing hand sizes and telling corny jokes. “You know I have never been with someone that makes me laugh this much”, “well that’s a good thing, and at least I’m not making stupid jokes that just make the situation awkward. Anyways I have to go work a shift at the surf shop. I’ll give you a call, okay?”. “Yeah for sure!” he kissed my forehead and walked downstairs. After he had exited my room I quickly stuffed my bag with my swim suit a towel and ran after him. I ran behind him and jumped on his back. “You know you’re supposed to invite your Girlfriend wherever you got, it’s like guy code number 1.”, “what now you’re my girlfriend?” there was an awkward silence. “I like the sound of that. I guess you kind of have to come now don’t you” he laughed. I jumped off his back and sat in the passenger seat of his car. The Day went by fast. His family’s surf shack was always super busy. He got me to put wax on all the surf boards. “Hey after my shift do you want to go out again?” my answer was almost instant “of course I want to!” we both smiled at each other and went back to work.”



25
The day went by fast of working and we didn’t even manage to go surfing. Instead we laid with our back on the warm sand. Holding hands, talking about our lives. He brought up the question that I really didn’t want to answer not to anyone. “What is your dream in life?”, “well not very many people know this. Well actually I don’t even think anyone here knows. My dream is to be in Cirque du Soliel!” he sat up... “Like a clown?” I sat up and punched him in the shoulder, “OW!” we both laughed, “no not like a clown, I want to do aerial silks. I have a show in a week at someone’s birthday party, I’ll sneak you in and you can come watch me! What do you think?”, “I think that would be lots of fun, but I can’t lie, I’m really glad your dream isn’t to be a clown. I kind of have a phobia of clowns. So I don’t think that would have gone over well”, “Well you know clowns are very nice people. I wouldn’t make fun of them. They’ll come and eat you!” laughing at him, “let’s go home. If I stay here any longer the crabs will make a nest in my hair.”, “okay, Race you back to the car!” of course I lost. Jumping in the car Zac revved up the engine and stepped on the gas. Going almost 140km/h I had to scream at him telling him to stop. Finally he did once I threatened to throw his prized possession star wars action figure out the window that was hanging on his mirror.
We got back to my house and I invited him in for dinner. The whole dinner the table was quite. I was thankful my dad didn’t bring up and awkward questions or any family stories from when I was a child that Zac would torment me with. After the most awkward dinner of my whole lifetime. We were all sitting outside on the patio soaking up the last of the sun for the day. “Thank you for dinner Rhonda it was delicious, But I should get going home! It was nice meeting you all!”, “no problem Zac, come by anytime!” I showed Zac to the door. “So you know that I have my show coming up on Friday. I’m going to be training every day so I probably won’t see you till then, but I’ll call you with info on the show!”. “A whole week without seeing my little snuggle bug!? This is going to be difficult!”, “I know but you will survive.” He went in to kiss me but I stopped him, “not in front of my parents!” I opened the door and we kissed for a good 3 minutes. Pushing him off me laughing, “I’ll see you in 4 days! Trust me it won’t be that terrible!”

The days felt like years not seeing Zac, but the routine was better than ever. The show was that night and I could feel the nerves kicking in. I gave Zac a call and told him the info, only hours away I had my costume made with a beautiful black costume with a mask! Leaving only two hours before show time we were driving up towards the party location. The drive up felt familiar. Pulling up to the house all I wanted to do was run away to Kansas. It was Violas house. “DAD, What are we doing here?!” this is the house were performing at, why?”, “nothing.”
What am I going to do, all the people who hate me with a passion are going to be here, and even worse Viola will be here.
Then a brilliant idea popped into my head, “hey dad since this is a masquerade party, shouldn’t we get into character and put our costumes on before the party?”, “what a brilliant idea Viola!” after changing into my costume in the back of the car, put on the slightest amount of makeup and was ready to make my grand entrance, hoping that Viola wouldn’t recognize me. The door was open and my mom and dad where setting up the aerial silk in the main lobby. Standing in front of the door getting into character. Viola took one glance at me and started walking towards me. “Oh how darling. And what are you?” I didn’t reply, “oh even better you don’t speak!” not suspecting a thing. Making my way back to the greenroom to my astonishment I saw Zac standing in the room with a bouquet of roses and wearing a mask. Placing the beautiful bundle of delicate flowers in my hand “good luck Zoe, you’ll be amazing.”, “you know I would kiss you but I don’t think you want lipstick on your face. Well not now anyways.” Laughing he placed his hands on my head and traced my face with kisses. Good luck!”
Three hours had passed and I could hear the room full of people. My dad walked into the green room quickly, “call time is in 3 minutes, get ready!” my heart started beating vigorously, “you’ll be amazing. Don’t worry.” Zac said in a consoling way. Walking out behind the stage and looking out into the crowd my music started. The was my que. The whole audience’s attention was not set on me. Climbing up and starting my routine everything came naturally and the nerves were gone. Not focusing on the audience. It was just me. Finishing with the last trick and turning upside down, my mask fell off. Before dropping my trick looking to see where it landed I couldn’t find it. The que for my last trick sounded and I descended down the silk rope. Climbing down to the floor the audience started to applaud and I walked to the edge of the stage for my bow. Smiling and waving I hear someone in the crowd gasp and yell, “Hey! Isn’t that Zoe!?” bowing and making my way back stage I saw Zac run towards me and sweep me off my feet. “You where AMAZING!!”, “Thank you!” both smiling into each other’s eyes.





27
Then someone came through the door clapping. Good job. “Cody what are you doing here, what do you want?”, “I knew I recognized you. But I had to see it for myself. “Zoe is this guy that hurt you?”. “Cody just leave, okay you’re not doing yourself any favours”, walking close and closer to me. “Let me congratulate you with a hug, common I don’t bite.” Backing up trying to escape the path he was making towards me, before I knew it Zac was in front of me and Cody was on the ground with a bloody nose, the whole situation felt like white noise to me. Then to make it even better Viola walked in the door. “Zoe what’s going on, why are you here. I told you once and for all. GET OUT OF MY HOUSE. You weren’t invited to my party.”. “We’ll see Viola, the only problem is you kind paying me to be here. Did you like me performance? See the thing is you always judge a person before you even know the truth. I didn’t sleep with Cody, and I bet you didn’t know that I was in the circus. I think its fate that all this happened. Maybe while we are all here you can tell Cody what is going on hey? Or did you get rid of that problem as well? See you got to think before you do something’s.” Viola stormed out back to her party and Cody followed hunched over covering his bloody nose.
“And Zoe Wins the match with a harsh, you’re a terrible person line” Zac said as if he were a broadcaster at a wrestling match. “You’re really good with your words aren’t you”? “Well let’s just say that I have been imagining this moment to happen for a while.” Both of us were laughing. The moment was interrupted by a man dressed in a tuxedo approached me, “you were the girl who just preformed?”, “yeah that was me alright, did you like the show?” like it? I loved it, I’m Mr. Simpson, I own a talent agency and I’ll tell you, I would love to represent you and get you to the big times girl! I got you’re act all on tape and I’m sending it now to the cirque du soliel talent bank!” My jaw dropped, this cannot be happening! “Are you serious?”, “of course I am!” he placed a card in my hand. “Give me your number and I’ll call you when I hear something back from the company if you have any questions give me a call at this number!” “Thank you so much sir!!!” I felt on top of the world that night. Words could not explain. “Zac do you know what this means?!” “OMG Yea!!” he said in a high pitch girly voice. “No I don’t, what on earth does this mean!?” we both were laughing our butts off at that point, “the talent agency is kind of like a bank where they chose different performers to be in a new show, or a replacement! It means my dream may actually be coming true!”, “that’s amazing Zoe, but I knew that you’re dream would someday come true. Seeing you out there on stage, it’s like that’s where you belong. You are so talented” He kissed me and pulled me close whispering in my ear. “Your dream is my dream”

It was 8am and Zac and I had laid outside on the sand all morning counting shooting stars. “You know Zac; ever since I was a little kid on every 11:11, eye lash and shooting star I would wish to someday be in Cirque du soliel. Even to this day it’s all I wanted. I may not be the most consistent with everything else but I knew always deep down in my heart that I wanted to perform for the rest of my life. It was so much a part of me I couldn’t ever give it up. Not a hope, It’s like some crazy connection that I have when m either performing, or just training.”, “have you ever wished on a kiss?” Zac said. “I have never even heard of that.”, “well you kiss someone you love, and then your wish will come true.”, “well that sounds very plausible. Let’s give it a try,” Zac quickly pecked me on the lips, “make a wish!” I checked my phone. “Nothing...” he laughed. “Okay then again” nothing happened. “Zac I’m starting to think that you just made this up.” He laughed with a suspicious smile on his face. Then all of a sudden my phone started to ring. Zac and I stared at each other laughing “No way...” he said. “Hello?”, “Hi Viola its Mr. Simpson, I got a call back from the talent agency, and you’re in!” Zac and I screamed like little girls who just got a life size Barbie dream house. “Zoe you need to come down and sign some papers, they want to fly you out to Montréal and start training in two days”, “Okay, I’ll be down later today! Thank You so much!” I hung up the phone and started dancing. Not noticing that Zac didn’t seem too excited anymore. “Zac why aren’t you dancing they let me in!”, “Zoe he said you have to go to Montréal to train, unless I missed that part...” the moment went bitter sweet. “I think I’m just going to go home Zoe, Good luck with Mr. Simpson. I’ll talk to you later.” For some reason my feet stuck to the ground, I couldn’t run after him. Something was holding me back. I yelled. “It’s not like I’ll be there forever! A comet just hit my dream, and blew it into a 1000 pieces.
My parents walked in to door, “Mom dad! I got into the Cirque du Soliel talent agency, they want to fly me out to Montréal and start training!” My dad excitingly said “Honey that’s great I’m so proud of you.” You need to drive me down to Mr. Simpson’s office. I have to sign some sheets. My mom said, “Well what we are waiting for, let’s get down there!”
After an hour of signing sheets, and buying plane tickets I was all set for Montréal, no turning back now. My dad, mom Aunt, Uncle and I all went out to celebrate! All of us were sitting around the table talking about all the new experiences that I’m going to be facing. Of course Aunt Rhonda had to bring something up about shopping, “oh dear we need to go buy you a whole bunch of new cloths and dresses!” we all let out a laugh “Aunt Rhonda, I’m not going to be partying. The only thing I’ll be focusing on is training. And trust me I have quite enough clothes to last me for that.
We all arrived home and the first thing I started to do was pack up all my things. Tomorrow was going to be my last day in California and I will soon be Canada Bound. After throwing all the clothes that I need in a big duffle bag I put it in the corner of my room and rested on my bed.




29
I cannot believe this is happening to me, and so fast. It’s such an amazing feeling when you accomplish my dreams. It’s really and unexplainable feeling. I just don’t understand why Zac is so upset; it’s my life goal and dream. He can’t just expect me to throw it all away. He needs to understand that I won’t be gone forever. I just hope I’ll get to see him before I leave.

Winter coats and palm trees

Waking up and smelling the fresh air infused with salt water this would be my last day in California, and my family. I tied my hair up and but shorts and a sweater on. Walking downstairs there was a beautiful spread for breakfast. Greeting me was my Aunt Rhonda with a big hug, Sit here. The whole house was sitting down for breakfast. “I have a present for you Zoe!” Aunt Rhonda gave me a big bag. “This will help you through the terrible winters there.” Out of the bag was a big fluffy black coat with fir around the hood. “Thank you Aunt Rhonda, But I’m going to Montréal... not the arctic.” Everyone laughed. “But I’m sure it will come in handy” I got up and gave her a hug. “Jeez Zoe, you have barley been here a month and you are already leaving.”, “well this is what I have been dreaming for my whole life, I’m just thankful for people like you who have been supporting me the whole way through.
We all had finished breakfast and sat outside the rest of the day talking. It was really the only time I can remember us all spending time together. The door bell rang. I was expecting it to be Zac showing up so I quickly made my way to greet him. Zac wasn’t at the door, it was Viola. She was holding a whole Bouquet of Lily’s. “I heard the news, Congratulations.”, “thank you; I really don’t know what to say”. “You don’t need to say anything. It’s me, look I’m really sorry for what I did. I still hate myself so much for doing it. You didn’t deserve that. I talked to Cody and he told me everything that happened. I’m sorry it took so long for me to realize this. But good luck out there. I know you will be amazing, and I’ll be there for you first show, and you last.” “That is so sweet Viola, I really appreciate this. Would you like to come in?”, “no its fine, I have some major shopping to do, Schools starting up again next week and need a new wardrobe that will drive the teachers crazy” laughing we made up and hugged goodbye.
I went upstairs and put the Lily’s in a vase right next to the flowers Zac had given me. They were starting to wilt. Pedals were falling onto the ground, reminding me of our first date when he had put the pile in front of my door. Even though I wasn’t in California for very long it and the people had a great affect on me. I had everything packed and the only thing left in the room was the pair of clothes I was going to wear to the air port. I was wearing the pyjamas that I had borrowed from Viola and forgotten to give back. I walked downstairs to say goodnight to everyone. I gave them all a big hug. I went back upstairs and onto the balcony for the last night in my room and looked up at the sky. The same sky Zac and I had been watching the night before. A shooting star flew by. This time I didn’t wish to be in Cirque du soleil, I wished that Zac would accept everything and I would get to see him for one last time before I left. I walked back into my room and slipped into the cold sheets, and fell into a deep sleep.

The alarm on my phone woke me up at 6:00 in the morning with the title ‘bring on Montreal’ I am so excited. I am ready for a new chapter in my life. I put on the clothes that I left out the night before and then put Viola’s pyjamas on the bed with a not saying to return to her. I walked down the stairs with my bag to a house that was raring to go. I was eating an apple and watching the sun rise, waiting for the last minute to leave for the air port hoping that Zac was going to stop by to say goodbye.
I got in the car and waved goodbye to the house and was onward to the airport, I was just waiting for Zac to call me, or come running after me for one last kiss. But there was no sign of him. Then all of a sudden my phone buzzed. I quickly looked at my phone. It was an advertisement for the phone company. What a disappointment. At that point I had lost all hope. We arrived at the airport and I was checking my bags in. I was at the gate getting ready to go to customs. My mom came up to me and hugged me, “be safe, and please call me when you get there! If you have any problems I will be there at the speed of sound, after her was my Aunt and uncle, giving me a group hug “we had so much fun with you here, we are going to miss you.” My aunt said. Both of them kissed me on the forehead. Lastly my dad came up and wrapped his arms around me, “I’m so proud of you sweet pea, good luck. I’ll see you soon!” I walked towards the gate and someone grabbed my hips. I knew who it was; I turned around and kissed them, “You know you should have looked before you kissed me. I could have been some random stranger. How awkward would that have been?” he flashed gorgeous his smile, “you know I wished for this moment last night”, “He kissed me quickly and closed his eyes. “I wish that I’ll see you very soon” he said. “You will, don’t worry.” I wrapped my arms around him as he kissed my forehead. “I will see you soon.” I walked through the gate waving. I was on the other side, on the road to the beginning of my life.
After a six and a half hour plane ride I had arrived in Montréal, there was an escort with my name on a board who took me to his car and drove me an hour to the training center. We drove through the center of Montréal, all the buildings were beautiful. We arrived and I got my bags out of the car and made my way into the residences, the secretary gave me my room number an directions, my room was 301 of the 6th floor. Standing in the elevator I was hoping for a roommate who spoke a bit of English. I entered the room with the key that looked like it was from the 1800’s and sitting on the bed was a girl with short white hair. She smiled at me “Hi, My name is lily, you must be Zoe!”, “OH thank god. You speak English, I was terrified that I was going to be stuck with some Russian girl who would be telling me she was going to kill me and I wouldn’t even know.”, “Don’t worry, I am a sane Canadian from Victoria.” Lily’s phone rang, “HEY DR, STEVE! Are you here? Sweet, I’ll be right down. We have a new recruit.” Drop your bags you are coming with me. “Wow, you must be really good friends with your doctor...” Lily laughed, “Dr, Steve is my friend Stephen. That’s just what I call him.”, “that just makes so much sense”.



32
“So Lily, What do you do?”, “well my inspiration was always to do Hand to Hand, But these bum’s they call coaches made me an aerialist.”, “well sounds like we already have something in common, I do Aerial silks.”. “Thank god, I thought you would be some freak like Stephen...”. “What does Stephen do?”, “he is the best clown you will ever meet” we reached the bottom floor and Lily went running out the doors and jumped on Stephen. “Stephen this is Zoe, Zoe this is Stephen”, “Nice to meet you Stephen.” Lily went into a whole different conversation with Stephen, “tryouts for the next show in Vegas are tonight, are you going to go?”, “of course!” Lily invited me into the conversation, “you should come and try out. You have to take every chance you got around here. Everyone is like a hungry tiger; they won’t let you get a part without a fight. “Zoe do you want to come up with me and Stephen and chose some costumes for tonight?” “Yeah for sure!” walking up a line of windy stairs into an old dusty room that was over filled with any costume you could imagine. I picked up the first one that caught my attention. Lily took a bit longer and ended up with a black and white striped costume that made her look like she belonged in France, and Stephen ended up with a costume that looked like... a Dog, but it was actually a Sasquatch. We walked over to the building next to the dorms and there was a line up of people of all different races, body shapes, and who all had the most outrageous costumes. Mine was the most plane out of them all. It is red and black with slits all along the side of the rib cage. We all finally reached the table and registered ourselves on the call list. The audition started and people were being called up act by act. “Lily, why aren’t they playing any music”, “they want to see where you get your inspiration from, and how you evolve it.”
There were less and less people in the building, which meant it was our turn soon, they called Stephen up first. “Good luck!” Lily and I said at the same time. Stephen went into the room where the stage was and 5 minutes later came out with a big grin on his face. “It went so well! Zoe I saw the list and you’re up next remembers eye contact and smile!” Stephen was right, only minutes later my name was called, my heart started to beat fast; I felt the nerves kick in. Then I was there standing on the stage with a panel of five judges staring at me if I were some freak. One of them stood up, “Hello Zoe, welcome to the audition. We have heard a lot of things about you. Now show us what you got.” Out of the ceiling the aerial silk came down. “Start whenever you want” I started to climb up the silk and that same feeling I had at Viola’s party kicked in. I had never performed so well and precise. I climbed down the silk. “That was beautiful, thank you!” I walked as fast as I could into the main lobby to meet with Lily and Stephen Lily eagerly asked, “How did it go?”, “it went amazing, I don’t think I have ever performed so well in my entire life, Lily when are you up?”, “They just called my for standby wish me luck”. Lily stood up and waited by the door. Stephen then asked, “So do you think you are going to get this show? I really hope so. This has been my dream forever, what about you?”, “well I think this one is it for me, I really felt something with the judges today, I’m expecting something good to come out of this... for all of us.”, “what time do the results come out at?” I asked. “They come out around an hour after auditions are over. Lily and I usually wait for the list to come out”. Lily came running out, “Guys they want all of us in the theatre.” Stephen and I ran to the door as fast as we could, then collected ourselves and walked in to the theatre, not knowing what to expect. I was hoping for a celebration party tonight.




33
We walked into the theatre and stood on the stage, they started with Stephen. A man stood up and started talking “Stephen your act was phenomenal; we would like you to represent us and join our show cast in Vegas. A lady stood up, “Lily your act made us melt through our seats you; we would also like you to join the show cast in Vegas, and last but now least Zoe, your act was one worth seeing. We have been anticipating seeing your act ever since Mr. Simpson sent us your video. We would as well like you to join our show cast in Las Vegas. I wanted to fall down to my knees and start crying. A man then said “ since all the acts in the show we are going to cast you in, we would like you all to perform the acts that you auditioned with tonight in the show tomorrow night, with our choice of music. Tomorrow you will get an hour of practice leading up to the show. “Thank you so much, you all!” Stephen, Lily, and I all ran out with our plane tickets. Once we got to the lobby we all started screaming and running around in circles as if the apocalypse was coming. Lily immediately said, “We are performing tomorrow, with cirque du soleil. We need to pack and get our sleep the plane ticket says we leave tomorrow morning at 8. We all skipped outside into the dorm rooms.
I grabbed my phone and went into the hall and called my mom and dad telling them the good news, and then following that I called Zac. I went back into the room and laid on the bed. “I can’t even believe this is happening to me, I just got here and I already am in a show in Las Vegas! With the first person I made friends with. This is so amazing.”, “It really is, isn’t it Zoe. But you should get some sleep. There will be a lot of traveling and excitement tomorrow. And without any sleep it will be mayhem. I snuggled into the bed that couldn’t even compare to the bed at Aunt Rhonda’s house and fell fast asleep.

Boarding the second plane in two days, Lily, Stephen and I were on our way to Vegas for our first show. The morning with the lines felt like forever and I’m sure the plane ride will as well. We arrived at the Vegas air port and were taken to the hotel we were performing at by limo. We reached the hotel and it was the most beautiful hotel I had ever seen in my entire life. We were celebrating our accomplishments already skipping down the hallways to our dressing rooms. We reached the entrance of the show and we were walking down the isle’s knowing that in only a few hours they would be filled with people there to watch us. Our dressing rooms were lined up side by side and I walked into it and there was a vase filled with roses. I shut the door and turned around. Zac was standing beside me, I jumped and threw my arms around his neck, “what are you doing here!?”, “I told you, I would be here for your first show and your last... and your aunt bought me a plane ticket to come and see your show with them, they are all here checking into the hotel, I’m really proud of you Zoe.” Thank you, but you know you’re really not supposed to be here right now” yeah I know I had to fight off a whole army of body guards.” We both were laughing the same way we did back on the beach in California. “I need to do my makeup and get ready; I’ll be looking out for you in the crowd.” I gave him the quickest longest kiss I could give him and kicked him out of my room. There was a sample of the music I would be performing too that night and I had it on replay, memorizing each sound que. I finished my makeup and had my costume on, and I had one practice run I started climbing and did the act like it was written on the back of my hand.
It was five minutes till call time and Lily, Stephen and I where all sitting around wishing each other good luck, I was one of the first acts up. I started dancing around back stage with Lily, getting myself pumped up for the beginning of forever. My music started, that was my que to go on stage. I looked into the crowd and saw my family and my love; I felt the warm light shining on my face. All attention was on me. it was a familiar feeling. One that I never wanted to forget.



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