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Fate Will Prevail

Fate Will Prevail
Summary: Dray and Deity are investigating a haunted house. They encounter a girl who they used to know. Strange thing is, she hasn't aged a bit. She chases the two protagonists out of the house, warping them into the post apocalyptic Earth.

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applesauceHater said...
Nov. 27, 2011 at 4:56 pm
 You're ideas are really good. Just some lack of descriptions got to me. Like how you flat out told it was a magical world, you can write hints and descritions for us readers to finally guess that it was a majical world. Add descrition in some areas to add intensity. But other than that, I loved it!Love magic! Ending was sad, but still good. Hope you continue your writing. If you have a chance, check out something of mine, I will be much obliged.

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