Marianne, affectionately known as my nana, was born on October 30, 1943. She is the eldest child to high school sweethearts Helen and John. Together they lived in a small one-bedroom apartment in Williamsburg, Brooklyn until they realized they needed more room for their growing family. They put a $10 down payment on a new house in Franklin Square and moved shortly after. Marianne remembers her mother always being home, always cleaning the house in a cotton dress, and bonnet with her hair in pin curls. Women at the time were quiet and less outspoken than today. There was an understanding that a woman’s place was in the home with the children. If a woman needed to get a job there were only a few careers available: secretary, teacher, and nurse. Although that lifestyle was extremely limiting to women, Marianne says that it was nice knowing her mother was always home. Marianne used to run home from school so that she would have her mothers attention before everyone else got there so she could talk to her mom about the day. Once everyone else came home, there was too much going on. Eight children is a lot for any family, and although no one ever said anything ddirectly to Marianne, she had a very real understanding that her family was poor. Her mother would buy a roast, which she would cut into such thin slices that she could get dinner and ten lunches out of it. Helen was given a food allowance from John each week; John worked in a navy yard. The allowance was small, but the children never went without. Until the time that Marianne was fifteen, her father was an alcoholic. She remembers coming home from school on her father’s payday and finding him passed out on the sidewalk. She would have to lift him up and bring him inside. This behavior was especially traumatizing on Marianne growing up. Even when John became sober, it was still very hard for her to forgive him and not feel resentment.

When it was time to go to high school, Marianne knew that her dream was to attend the all-girls catholic school, Sacred Heart. She felt that if she could attend that school that her life would be perfect. Because Marianne is so intelligent, she was able to attend the school after her mother begged for a reduced tuition on account of her marvelous grades. The nuns at Sacred Heart did not let Marianne forget that she was there on a reduced tuition and would make fun of the fact in front of the rest of the class. She remembers her experience at Sacred Heart to not be as wonderful as she imagined. Gym class at Sacred Heart was something I thought to be untrue. The uniform was a yellow pair of bloomers connected to a yellow button up shirt. In gym, they would line up with books on their head and practice walking like a lady to marching music. Occasionally they were taught lady-like sports like tennis and softball. Marianne also remembers that the girls were always encouraged to go to Chaminade sports events to support the boys, Chaminade being the all-boys Catholic school nearby.

When Marianne graduated at seventeen, she decided to enter the convent. She felt that becoming a nun was her vocation in life. She felt a calling from God. Her family was immensely proud. Once you entered the convent, you gave up all of your freedoms. Careers were chosen for you based on your grades in high school. Girls who received high grades became teachers, while others became nurses. Marianne went to school to become a teacher, and luckily enough loved her job very much. She continued teaching after leaving the convent at twenty-four years old. She was not the first, and certainly not the last of her entering group that decided to leave. The all kept in contact though, and through the years Marianne learned that most of the girls who entered the convent had problem fathers. She thinks that entering the convent was a way to escape the fate of their mothers. Luckily for Marianne, she met her now husband, my poppa, Bill Kelly, a few months later and she never looked back. Their marriage is filled with love, trust, and respect; and always has been.

Marianne truly amazes me. She grew up in a different world, one where girls were quiet and knew their place. One where she could go into the city with a friend at age twelve by herself. The world Marianne lived in seemed safer, she said, although she knows now that terrible things were always happening, but it was less talked about. It seems generations before Marianne grew up as products of their environment. But Marianne did not. She is strong, smart, open-minded, and understanding; yet also generous, beautiful, and ladylike. She understands how different things were and thinks that a women’s studies class is very important to everyone. I am truly honored to have her as my nana, and to be influenced by her everyday. Women like Marianne are what keep the world moving instead of stopping in its tracks.