Heartbreak

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Isn’t it nice to think that you have a special connection with someone?

To think that, “Hey, there’s a chance that this person might be that special significant other for me.”

And then…you realize that this will never happen. It’s funny how idiotic we humans can be when it comes to our hearts sometimes. We get close to someone even though in some cases, the person you fell for doesn’t even feel as strongly as you feel for them. We push away the bad thoughts that will lead to heartbreak, but that only brings upon the heartbreak.

Then emerges the heartbreak. The heartbreak comes not when you’ve realized how stupid you were and how they don’t even love you back, no. The true heartbreak emerges when you walk past that person and they look down at the floor instead of at you. The real heartbreak comes when you’re standing around with friends trying to forget that person, and they come close to you. They then hug a friend tightly and you think back to when they would hug you as if they never wanted to let you go and tell you things that make your heart bounce and give you butterflies…and they don’t even acknowledge your existence. The real heartbreak comes when you come to the point of feeling like your heart was ripped out of your chest. You put it back together each time, but it keeps falling apart every time you think of that person.

The real heartbreak comes when, people constantly tell you that if someone is really into you, they’ll make it known by actions, not words.
Yet you didn’t ever listen to them. You only listened to your heart. And that’s what you get for listening to your heart. Nothing but heartbreak.

Then comes the cycle:

1. Feeling sorry for yourself and putting yourself down
2. Blaming the person who you fell for
3. Anger
4. Not wanting to ever fall for anyone ever again
5. Moving on temporarily
6. Think of the person again
7. Repeat

It hurts. It hurts so much. Tell me, tell me why nothing special ever happened between us. You rejected me many times but I never gave up because I thought there was something there. I was foolish and at times I felt clingy…though I knew I wasn’t. But one thing is for sure- I’m tired of this happening to me all of the time. I need to stop letting myself get hurt. I need to stop being so sensitive. I have finally realized that love will come eventually, and I don’t need it now. The only thing that comes my way is misfortune when these events come up, and I’m sick of it.





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