I Used To...

February 23, 2011
By Anonymous

I used to cry my eyes of when I knew It wasn’t going to be the same ever again but now, I just say “whatever” A lot of people had made me suffer. My mom having a boyfriend that I hated, my sister moving away a couple of miles away that seemed like eternity, my dad dedicating his life to his business and only see him over the summers. All of these things had made me grow thick skin. I ignore mean looks, gestures, and comments those things don’t affect me at all. I’m really good at hiding my emotions. These things may not seem like much but I’m am weird like that and I learned to tolerate them .

My mom having a boyfriend that I basically hated ,was awful I hated him because, I felt like he was stealing my mother away from me ,my favorite parent . I know It’s not okay to pick favorites but ,my dad was already with someone and I didn’t want to loose another one . I think It’s little different when I talk about my mom I just love her to much to ever let her go or share her for that fact. I also know It’s not okay to hate someone but something about my mom’s boyfriend wasn’t right, I also let him know I hated him. I’d step on him, close the door when he was behind me, not tell my mom he’d call, I would even stain his clothes, I know but I was in 5th grade and a little immature so I didn’t know any better. Thankfully he’s not here anymore. I sometimes think I drew him off but I try not to feel guilty, and I don’t.

My sister moving away with Mia and Joshue, my nephews wasn’t outstanding either. To make it worst she didn’t even say goodbye she called me and my mom while we were in Dallas, TX for spring break her boyfriend and her wanted to be more stable and decided to move away. When I got back I went upstairs as to find her still there watching TV or doing her homework but she wasn’t . The house finally felt 10,000 square feet , without joy, or love . What had happened to that love our home had? Did it get swallowed into a huge black hole? So that all that was left was thick, cold oxygen.

My mom then said that we could move into a smaller house my dad had near the beach so that we wouldn’t feel so hollow. I hesitated I didn’t want to leave all of my precious me memories but I know that would be better, but I said “No, I rather go live in another house but not my dad’s” so we ended up going to live in another city and I went to another school I actually wanted to go, I wanted to make new friends, be a different person. I did . I made a ton of friends and I was happy again.

Now I am very joyful, cheerful, and with high spirits. I adore my life and wouldn’t change It for anything. If I had to relive those hard moments again I would be glad to because those moments made me who I am today ,a very small but brave and mature young girl.

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