Speak Up

June 28, 2010
By Anonymous

This is for all of the people out there who have had a friend belittle them and use them. This is our voice, these are our words:

You are probably wondering how this happened so fast. Well for me it was not fast, it was gradual. It was day after day of you criticizing my every move. In your eyes nothing I ever did was good enough, and you had no problem saying that. You insulted every part of me when ever you could; you beat me down every day for whatever reason. You had to make our friendship some sort of power struggle. You used me, I felt so unappreciated. You would go to your other friend’s house for weeks on end and then when they got tired of you, you called me. When your world would fall apart, you called me. And I was always there you never even asked me how I felt or if I was going through anything, you did not care, you only cared about yourself and the problems that you created. Now when ever I see you I just want to scream.

You have this rage where all you do is put people down. You verbally state your problems with each of your friends and then you crawl to them when the going gets tough. No matter what it was there always had to be a fight every few months. It got to a point were I just expected to be in a fight with you because it had been so long. Did you ever notice that every fight that you ever got into with any of your friends, that you were the one that started? And that the other person always had no idea what you were talking about. I do not know why you did this or why you still do this but I cannot take it anymore. You hurt me so much, so many times, I just couldn’t take it anymore, and I had finally hit my breaking point.
When ever we would get into a fight you would say “Why are playing the victim”, well I acted that way because I had no idea where you were coming from, I really did not. Out of the maybe 15 or 20 fights that we had I think maybe 2 of them were actually legitimately there.
I will admit I made some mistakes, I was not perfect in handling all of this but never the less, everyday I felt belittled by you. The ending of this friendship, is the only way for me to forgive you. I cannot be friends with someone I have no respect for. You built this fire every time you say that I was worthless and every time that you would pick a fight with me… you did this. And this has nothing to do with me becoming friends with other people even though you think that they “Stole” me away from you, they did not I chose to live my life and move on from you. Even though you thought that I did not have a mind of my own… I DID! And now I’m using it like I should have all along.
As much as you want to say that you are sorry, whether you do or not I cannot be a friend to you. In the last 3 years you hurt me more than any other person has. I forgive you, even if you are not sorry, I really do because you taught me that I need to use my voice, so I hope you are hearing me loud and clear.

I won’t fight anymore especially over petty things that were never any of your business. So that’s it I’m done. No matter what I will no longer be calling you a friend. I can honestly say we will never speak again. I really want you to look at this as an opportunity so you can change. All of you friendships have ended at one point or another. So you need to change so this does not happen to you again. If you continue to do this than you will live a lonely life and I honestly do not think that you deserve that. I will never be able to forgive you but this does not have to happen to anyone else, you just have some things to figure out.

Best of wishes to you and I hope you have a wonderful life and have learned from this as much as I have. Goodbye…

The author's comments:
We've all had a friend that used us, and hurt us more than anyone. This is what I wished I had said to that friend and probably what you wish you could say.

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