When I was a little girl I always dreamed of a fairytale love, you know the kind where the prince rescues his one true love… the beautiful princes locked in a castle graded by a dragon. Well as I grew my little dream became a little more modern- I just wanted to find my perfect guy. No he wouldn’t be completely perfect, he’d have his imperfections, but he’d be perfect for me. Well I found him…he’s sweet, hot, and caring or so I thought. No-wait he is all of these things just completely perfect for me but I never realized how wrong I was for him…’till now. Before him I had nothing, but dreams. Dreams that were impossible to turn into reality, impossible because they were based on stories and false hope, they were based off fairytales. He showed me that my dreams needed be shaped to me, not me shaped to them. And yes there is a difference. Happy… I thought I knew what it was but I didn’t. I didn’t ‘till he showed me. He taught me what life actually was, and most of all he showed me that my life had a purpose. I miss that… the happiness and the will to live, but they disappeared with him. Swift, and quite. Just like that all my hopes and plans for the future vanished and most of all the only person I had, the one person I trusted. I gave him everything; I slept with him, twice. My mistake…I think that’s where he began to change his mind about us. Just like every other guy I was warned about. But my troubles don’t end there, no they get much worse. I thought I could be pregnant, consequences of no protection. He was upset, but for some reason stayed, he tried to make me see the bright side of things, he said if I was he hoped for a girl. Well his family wanted me to stay the night with all of them one night, and we got into a disagreement. He hit the van, woke his mom up, and got in trouble. We were told that we had to stay away from each other for a few weeks. Yet my problems just kept adding up…his family found out we had sex, they made him leave me, even though he said if that happened he wouldn’t listen. Just can’t trust what people say I guess. I’m not pregnant. Thank god. I don’t need another reminder of him, on top of my broken heart, and him living right down the street; always seeing him by accident always brings back memories of us and the heartbreak. I know he is perfect for me no matter our families, I just wish he saw that to.
May 12, 2010