Fitting In | Teen Ink

Fitting In MAG

By MonicaMS BRONZE, Providence, Rhode Island
MonicaMS BRONZE, Providence, Rhode Island
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

I wouldn't ask for a dressing room. My mom always asked for me.
The evening before I had repeatedly risen from my seat and piled on excess noodles suffocated in meat sauce. Then I licked my bowl with the buttered garlic bread, leaving no evidence of the four servings I had inhaled. In the morning I would be forced to lie on my bed and suck in my stomach just to button my jeans. I dreaded school shopping. The sale rack, with its slender size markers, knew my number continued to bloat.

I learned how to eat from my dad: fast and without thinking. In our house, the dinner table involved battle, with the children on defense. One false move and our dinner would be snatched off our plates without warning and gobbled up by our father faster than we could blink. We soon learned to keep a hand up while devouring our chicken strips, and if Mom decided to cook that night we needed to hurry and get seconds before it was gone.

Only one pair of jeans I tried on fit. I lied and told my mother I could button every pair but only needed the jeans that lay guarded in my hands. We walked to the checkout.

I kept my head down as we passed a group of girls. They whispered. I glanced up only long enough to know my place. Their eyes cut at me, hands cupped over their mouths in secrecy.

***

The recess bell rang and I followed two girls in my third grade class out past the monkey bars to the fenced grassy area. We all wore the same clothes that year: khaki pants and polo shirts. Everyone was the same, or that was the idea.

“I like your pants. Where did you get them?” Marcy asked Alicia. I nodded in agreement, thankful they had removed their cupped hands and I could hear the conversation.

“Really? I like yours better,” Alicia replied.

“We should trade. What size are you?” Marcy asked.

“I don't know …” Alicia said, finding the tag in the back of her pants. “Seven.”

“Me too,” Marcy said.

***

I hid in line as I held the jeans, tag folded in so nobody could see the number inscribed on it was 12. I am not a size seven.



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This article has 348 comments.


wspencer said...
on Dec. 8 2010 at 12:53 pm
Yeah this article is true about some girls because they dont want to fell ashame about wearing a big size but they just need to be there self's and chill out with all the haters.?

laughsalot said...
on Dec. 8 2010 at 9:49 am

i can relate their is alot of pressure to be skinny

but just remeber you are who are

no need to change that 


on Dec. 4 2010 at 11:02 pm
GreenDayFan SILVER, Phoenix, Arizona
7 articles 3 photos 134 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every story has an end, but in life, every ending is just a new beginning."
-Uptown Girls

But I am a size small in shirts.

on Dec. 4 2010 at 11:00 pm
GreenDayFan SILVER, Phoenix, Arizona
7 articles 3 photos 134 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every story has an end, but in life, every ending is just a new beginning."
-Uptown Girls

I feel the same way as you do. I wear a size 11 in pants.

on Dec. 4 2010 at 5:25 pm
emmacxoxo PLATINUM, Chelsea, Massachusetts
22 articles 6 photos 26 comments

Favorite Quote:
Okay. Okay.

it can go the other way too, i was a 00 for so long, i was wasting away...it made me feel isolated and everyone constantly made comments

on Nov. 22 2010 at 6:26 pm
SkyDeer PLATINUM, Mebane, North Carolina
20 articles 19 photos 49 comments

Favorite Quote:
Respect the nerds, they will be your boss someday- The Computer Guy.
The best is yet to come and baby won't it be fine- A band.
Defiant is the best word in the dictionary!

It doesn't matter what size you are- remeber that.

on Nov. 22 2010 at 5:31 pm
HeyAmanda SILVER, Rancho Cucamonga, California
8 articles 0 photos 47 comments
except in my house if u served yourself to much you had to sit there and and finish, full or not.

on Nov. 22 2010 at 5:21 pm
HeyAmanda SILVER, Rancho Cucamonga, California
8 articles 0 photos 47 comments

can completely relate

i havent been a size seven since i was 4


on Nov. 16 2010 at 5:37 pm
thats so true i've always found thats' a hard thing to believe until this year because i'm finally starting to look at myself inm the mirror and say your beatiful to myself

on Nov. 11 2010 at 2:50 pm
soulrebel SILVER, Birmingham, Alabama
5 articles 0 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when i can see footprints on the moon."

This is great. :) I can relate all too well. Fitting in is definitely a hard thing. But remember that you are beautiful, no matter your size. Beauty comes from the inside.

AMG29 GOLD said...
on Nov. 11 2010 at 1:03 pm
AMG29 GOLD, Dearborn, Michigan
15 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Favorite Quote:
Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, and therefore is winged cupid painted blind." William Shakespeare.

This is great. :) I can relate all too well. Fitting in is definitely a hard thing. But remember that you are beautiful, no matter your size. Beauty comes from the inside.

on Nov. 11 2010 at 8:48 am
erikampell SILVER, Willow Branch, Indiana
9 articles 4 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If at first you dont suceed, dont quit, push yourself" / "Push yourself, push yourself to the limit"

girl if this is true about you I totally know where you are coming from. I know the feeling and it sucks. im in an 18 now and i remember when i was a five.

quad14 said...
on Nov. 11 2010 at 7:47 am
quad14, Shaker Heights, Ohio
0 articles 0 photos 2 comments
many people go through the same thing and feel that they dont belong and that they don't fit the appearance that others will approve

Ainse BRONZE said...
on Nov. 6 2010 at 7:18 pm
Ainse BRONZE, Calgary, Other
1 article 5 photos 18 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If I don't write to empty my mind, I go mad." -Lord Byron
"Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life" -Mark Twain

I really admire your bravery to post this!  You are a great writer!  I'm very impressed at your strength, I am sure that not everyone would have the courage to do that.

Great article :)


on Nov. 4 2010 at 7:19 pm
Jakethesnake BRONZE, Hernando, Mississippi
1 article 0 photos 96 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Read, Read... Read everything, then write."-William Faulkner

It's so cool that you are so free to post that. Did it help?

on Nov. 1 2010 at 5:57 pm
bobmarley917 BRONZE, Littleton, Colorado
1 article 0 photos 8 comments
I think it was brave of you to talk about what you go through on life

Rileyy BRONZE said...
on Nov. 1 2010 at 4:55 pm
Rileyy BRONZE, Huntingtown, Maryland
4 articles 0 photos 6 comments

I reaallly love this expericence.

That takes strength to post it. Good for you.


awesome said...
on Nov. 1 2010 at 11:45 am
jk, cool story though!

gape horn said...
on Oct. 29 2010 at 4:41 pm

I like this one i have no idea whats its like to be smaller than everybody. Il like it and i express myself and you should 2

 


~Chastine~ said...
on Oct. 26 2010 at 3:20 pm

i never really had a problem with people making fun of my body. mainly they attacked me over my looks. something i cant really control. the best way that i learned to cope with it, is to think to yourself, your not the only one.

:)