Tell me about it. Please, do tell my secrets or these lies you all wish to be true so you believe them to make them a permanent part of my reality. Well HERE, RIGHT HERE, is what I have to say about that. After three years, of hiding behind four built in walls, of letting you control my life, of acting like someone I’m not, I’m here to tell you the truth.
I’m a fifteen year old girl with big dreams. Huge even. I have a past I’m not entirely proud of. I’m not afraid to admit that. After years of being afraid of my past, I’ve learned to accept it. For those of you, who don’t know what is going on, because you either don’t know me or don’t care to get to know me, I have severe depression and anxiety, but the best relationship is with yourself. It just takes time and effort. This is all I have, but it’s enough for me and I’m done handing out every piece of me to everyone who doesn’t deserve or work for it.
It’s just so hard, because you want to change the world from its bitterness, but you can’t because you’re just one person.Be the change, the change you want to see in the world, because someone will pay it forward.
I just want you to know. Yes, I’ve taken a break. And, yes, I’m okay. There is pretty much nothing that is going on anymore. I’m just so sick and tired of the world and allthis bitterness everyone shows towards each other. I hate watching us have to fight a war inside our heads every day, but then also have to fight against the world.
Don’t think for one second that you are the only one with the whole world on your shoulders, because I’m not going to deny that you have the world on your shoulders, but so does someone else. Maybe, not in the same way, but we wouldn’t be in this situation if we’d just stop fighting ourselves and each other, but rather the world around us and how twisted it is. When it comes down to it, we are all warriors and survivors, but we are killing off each other from the inside out with our words and actions.
I’m no longer scared of tomorrow or yesterday, because you are my present. You are my goal. I would rather you be happy than myself, but how can I make you happy when I can’t even keep myself happy?
People in this society are sick. We constantly listen and spread rumors. Even make them to make ourselves feel better. We label anyone and everyone based off looks, stereotyping them off their choices, not knowing why they made that choice or who they really are.
I am not turning down you, but the world. I want nothing to do with this hypocritical, stereotypical, labelling world. You said I was no good. You labeled me and my friends. You stereotyped me for my beliefs. I’m sorry, but is it too much to ask for, for someone to truely get to know me. And not use me for your sick intentions.
Please, stop bullying me and the people around you. I;m not saying everyone reading this is or ever has been a bully, but too many people in this world are. And it’s driving me insane. Sometimes people hurt you so bad that you stop hurting at all. That is until someone makes you feel again and it all comes flooding back and everything you felt before is back and it overwhelms you. Your past doesn’t define you.You can beat bullying. But only if we come together…