Hospital Room

January 6, 2016
By --Em-- GOLD, Grand Rapids, Michigan
--Em-- GOLD, Grand Rapids, Michigan
15 articles 0 photos 32 comments

It wasn’t sunlight, but rather the all-consuming darkness that woke me that night. My mind was groggy and hesitant to rouse, where was I and why did I have to wake?
I opened my eyes ever so slightly, just enough to obtain a sense of the unknown environment I found myself in. As I glanced down, I panicked for a moment, sure that I was hallucinating when I saw the long, thin snakes with their mouths attached to my arms. I attempted to scream, but my voice wouldn’t come. The skin of the snakes was transparent and I stared, simultaneously terrified and mesmerized as fluid the color of currant wine flowed through their bodies and into mine.
Averting my eyes from the strange serpents, I took in the entirety of my surroundings. There was a single window in this mysterious cell of mine. The curtains were pulled aside, allowing me a view of the stars, burning brightly against the ink of the night sky. The four walls containing me in this prison were bleached white; they were dull and lifeless. I longed for a splash of color, anything to brighten this dreary place.
There were such strange noises all around me, each one in turn demanding my attention. I tried to block the overwhelming sounds from my mind, but the beeping of the metal box next to my bed overpowered everything else. I dreaded the sounds that dark box made as if it were a bomb, its steading ticking counting down to the time of my demise.
As I lifted my hand to check the state of my hair, I was shocked to realize that my hand wasn’t moving. I tried again, but I simply couldn’t do it. I panicked at the numbness I felt throughout my entire body. Why couldn’t I move? What was wrong with me?
Suddenly, a woman with tired eyes and plain clothes burst through the door. I must have frightened her, for she seemed shocked to see me like this.  Perhaps it was my eyes that brought about that look on her sagging face, for my eyes were blue fire, wild with fear and ready to burn anyone who came too close. I shook my head wildly; hot tears stung my eyes as I tried to scream again, but couldn’t.
But the look of fear soon left the homely woman and was replaced with one of determination and pity. I was confused, why did this strange woman pity me, a prisoner tied to her bed?  Worn out from my protesting, I found that I didn’t have the energy to even lift my head. I watched helplessly as the woman pressed a needle into my skin and emptied its contents into my bloodstream.
Then I slept


The author's comments:

This is an excerpt of a short story I wrote. With this piece, I tried to convey the confusion and fear of a woman who finds herself in a hospital room with no idea of where she is and what is happening.


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This article has 6 comments.


Air568 BRONZE said...
on Jul. 10 2016 at 1:32 pm
Air568 BRONZE, Vienna, Virginia
4 articles 0 photos 24 comments

Favorite Quote:
The only thing to fear is fear itself.

I have dreamed dreams no mortal has ever dared to dream.

This is really good! You are very talented!Keep writing!

on Jan. 21 2016 at 5:37 pm
WeirdosUnite SILVER, Prairie Farm, Wisconsin
8 articles 4 photos 32 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Give me your hands if we be friends, and Robin shall restore amends"~Puck, A Midsummer Night's Dream

WOW. You. Are. Amazing!!!!! Please...POST MORE!!

on Jan. 12 2016 at 9:06 am
AithlynFreye BRONZE, Oxford, Alabama
4 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I wonder sometimes if the motivation for writers ought to be contempt, not admiration." -Orson Scott Card

I loved it! It's well-written and has such mystery to it that makes me want more. Maybe you could post the rest of your short story sometime. Keep writing like this :)

on Jan. 11 2016 at 6:37 pm
BreeZephyr SILVER, Broken Arrow, Oklahoma
7 articles 0 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
“In the moment when I truly understand my enemy, understand him well enough to defeat him, then in that very moment I also love him...it's impossible to really understand somebody, what they want, what they believe, and not love them the way they love themselves.” - Orson Scott Card, Ender's Game

Oh ha ha sorry reading this on my phone and I didn't see that the title was actually "Hospital"...*sigh* I apologize. I think I'll go to bed earlier tonight.

on Jan. 11 2016 at 6:05 pm
BreeZephyr SILVER, Broken Arrow, Oklahoma
7 articles 0 photos 84 comments

Favorite Quote:
“In the moment when I truly understand my enemy, understand him well enough to defeat him, then in that very moment I also love him...it's impossible to really understand somebody, what they want, what they believe, and not love them the way they love themselves.” - Orson Scott Card, Ender's Game

I assume that our poor protagonist is in a hospital? (If not, sorry; I've been at the hospital a lot lately, watching procedures, so it might just be that the hospital is on my mind!) But anyway, I liked this little story. It wasn't overdone description-wise, and the part where the narrator couldn't move was appropriately chilling. Perhaps later we could learn what's wrong with the patient. Anyway, keep up the good work :)

on Jan. 10 2016 at 8:02 pm
CNBono17 SILVER, Rural, South Carolina
5 articles 0 photos 250 comments

Favorite Quote:
Lego ergo sum (Latin—I read, therefore, I am)
The pen is mightier than the sword—unknown
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, and in purity—1 Timothy 4:12

Now I'm wondering what's wrong with her. Anyway, you did an amazing job with this; it's such a simple story, with such a poignant look into the thoughts of your character; the reader feels her panic. I'd love some backstory, but that's just me:) Love it! God bless!




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