New Moon (Sequal to Twilight) In About 5 Minutes

May 30, 2010
By NeverFallTooHard PLATINUM, Hartford, Wisconsin
NeverFallTooHard PLATINUM, Hartford, Wisconsin
24 articles 5 photos 98 comments

Favorite Quote:
Reason is powerless in the expression of Love.~ Rumi
Realisim, in painting, is what one wants to see, not what they really see. ~ Janet Fish


*Dramatic piano Music*
(Edward and Bella stand outside of Bella's house by the truck)
Bella: It's my birthday
Edward:So....?
Bella: Kiss me.
Edward *Scared look* uhh... Okay?
*They kiss*

(At the Cullen Mansion thingie. Everyone is in a circle)

Alice: It's time! It's Time! Bella, open your presents.
Bella: But I don't like-
Alice *Devilish look* OPEN THEM!!!
Bella: Okay, Okay! Sheesh.
*Bella opens package and gets a papercut. Blood squirts out everywhere*
Bella: Ahhh!! Call a doctor!!
Jasper: *Looks at bella and licks lips* tasty.....
Edward: NOOO!!! *Pushed bella into piano*
Bella: OW!
Edawrd: Sorry......*Hits Jasper* I was trying to protect you.......
Bella: You didn't do a good enough job. *Walks away.
Emmett: Remind me why you like her?
Edward: *sighs* I don't know anymore...Let's leave her.
EVERYONE: YEAH!!!!

(Edward and Bella are outside in woods)

Edward: Bella I'm leaving.
Bella: But Edwrad-
Edward: *hides behind a tree*
bella: *Hyperventalates*
*Jacob comes out of nowhere*
Bella: Jacob! I love you now that Edward's not here!
Jacob: *Shrugs* I'll take it!

(*Later on*)

Bella: Let's build a bike!
Jacob: When did you like Bikes?
Bella: Shut up and build us some bikes that we can ride romantically into the sunset with....*Smiles and looks lovingly away*

(Daydream)
Jacob: Hop on Bells!
bella: *Smiles brightly* OKAY Jackee! *Hops on and rides off a cliff into the sunset*
(End Daydream)

Bella: *Shakes herself out of daydream*
Jacob: FINSIHED!!
Bella: Let us ride into the sunset!
Jacob: Where have you been all month.....?
Bella: *Hops on back of the bikes* Let's go Jake! I wanna feel the adrenaline rush!
Jacob: *Gulps* Kay then....
Bella: *Sees figure of Edward* EDDY!
Edward: I'm not real! Leave me alone!
Bella: *Crashes into a rock* Kay then *Sniffle*

(Bella and Jacob at Bella's house)

Alice: Ding-DONG! I'm at the door! *Knocks on door and then breaks it down*
*BElla and Jacob stare with eyes wide open*
Bella: Alice!!*Hugs her*
Alice: Bella! *Sniff-Sniff* You smell great....
Bella: I'll go away now....
Alice: NO! Edward thinks you're dead. He's Gunna go commit suicide!
Bella: Can vampires do that?
Alice: Only the sparkly, magical, soft,non-sharp-toothed Cullens can! *Beams with pride*
Jacob: Bella don't go!
Bella: No, Jake. Now that Edwrad's back, I love him. You will just have to wait your turn.
Jacob: But I'm a werewolf!
Bella: *Eyes widden* When did that happen?!?
Jacob: A While ago. We just didn't mention it cause it was so obvious. Did you see any of the New Moon trailers? That ruined everything!
Bella: True. I still gotta go.
Jake: *Whimpers*

(Outside in Rome)

Alice: GO BELLA!
Bella: OKAY! *Trips over fountian* Ouch!!!
Edward: *Walks into sun*
Bella: EDWARD NO!!!
Edward: *Looks at Bella* GOD! Can't this chick leave me alone?
Bella: *Hugs Edward* RUNNN!!!!
Edward:*Sigh* You won't let me be, will you?
Bella. No. I'm persistant *Insane laugh*
Edward *Sarcastic laugh* yes you are....*Sigh* Let's go home.

(On a plane home)

Bella: Okay. Edward- um...I've been meaning to ask you something. ..
Edward: *Sigh* What is it, Bella.
Bella: Will you marry me?
Edward: *Scoffs* NO!
Bella:*Grab's Edwards Earlobe* Do it or I'll seduce you....
Edward: Okay okay!!!!!
Bella: *Smiles* YEA!!!!!


The author's comments:
This is a parody. I love aprodies, so I made one. I love the Twilight Saga, but the Parodies are just as good. Please comment and rate!!!

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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 46 comments.


on Sep. 30 2010 at 7:15 pm
ThatClarinetPerson SILVER, Tequesta, Florida
8 articles 0 photos 227 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life. Don't talk to me about life."
~Marvin the Paranoid Android (from the Hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy series)
Statistical analysis suggests that i am probably in tune with someone
(hahahahaha! I love this cause i'm never ever ever in tune >o

"do it or i'll seduce you!" lol. love it!

on Aug. 27 2010 at 1:31 pm
ForeverFelix PLATINUM, Catasauqua, Pennsylvania
30 articles 2 photos 207 comments

Favorite Quote:
Daydreams can be worse than nightmares, but that never stops me.

Good job =) stalkerish bella is kinda funny

on Aug. 26 2010 at 6:22 pm
fallingdusk BRONZE, Manlius, New York
2 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
With each person that dies, a library is burned.

told u i'd read/rate it! this piece is really good. I think its really funny!!!

on Aug. 26 2010 at 9:40 am
NonsensicalMuse PLATINUM, San Anotnio, Texas
22 articles 0 photos 87 comments

Favorite Quote:
"There is nothing wrong with having your head in the clouds as long as you don't get altitude sickness"

"Perhaps you are right,perhaps not. I don't know 110% either way.All I know is that Im in search of truth. If you are too, let us be friends."

OMG LOL!!!

on Jul. 13 2010 at 8:28 pm
Authorgal98 GOLD, Frankort, Illinois
17 articles 0 photos 195 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Let your mind sart a journey through a strange new world..."

Haha so true! hehe i love making parodies of twilight, i worte one for camp

on Jul. 7 2010 at 5:01 pm
Kristen_M BRONZE, Mooresville, North Carolina
2 articles 10 photos 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A good cry lightens the heart." -Yiddish Porverb

OMG!! That was really funny!! This is becoming my favorite!! Awesome job!

dancer13 GOLD said...
on Jul. 5 2010 at 7:15 pm
dancer13 GOLD, Troy, Michigan
19 articles 0 photos 98 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them." ~Jane Austen

Yeah, I wonder how that'd work...

on Jul. 3 2010 at 9:30 pm
NeverFallTooHard PLATINUM, Hartford, Wisconsin
24 articles 5 photos 98 comments

Favorite Quote:
Reason is powerless in the expression of Love.~ Rumi
Realisim, in painting, is what one wants to see, not what they really see. ~ Janet Fish

OMG a hundred views!!!!!

on Jun. 29 2010 at 8:41 pm
NeverFallTooHard PLATINUM, Hartford, Wisconsin
24 articles 5 photos 98 comments

Favorite Quote:
Reason is powerless in the expression of Love.~ Rumi
Realisim, in painting, is what one wants to see, not what they really see. ~ Janet Fish

I KNOW! it looks like such a good Parody book. but I can't belive Stephanie Meyer let someone PARODIZE her book! XD Still funny though.

on Jun. 26 2010 at 12:26 pm
fyreflies BRONZE, Randolph, Wisconsin
4 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." Doctor Suess
"Oh, of course it doesn't hurt to slide in softball." (before I tore up both knees and before I slapped that person)
"Stay with me here now/And never surrender" Skillet

WOW. And I loved how stalkerish Bella is! FUNNY.

Megan96 GOLD said...
on Jun. 14 2010 at 5:08 pm
Megan96 GOLD, Tooele, Utah
10 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
This is my Timey Wimey detector! It goes ding when there's stuff.

I LOVED THIS !!!

on Jun. 14 2010 at 1:41 pm
creativewritingismything SILVER, Brookshire, Texas
6 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Creativity is a masterpiece in itself. The ability to manifest that masterpiece, and to recognize its worth, can be found in each of us, if only we would take the time to find our inspiration."
~Samantha Stewart (ME! :D)~

OMG That was HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!! i absolutely positively and all those other "lys" loved it!!!!

on Jun. 13 2010 at 7:47 pm
SarClark BRONZE, NC, Connecticut
2 articles 0 photos 534 comments
Lol nice :)

Acumichi23 said...
on Jun. 13 2010 at 6:53 pm
So funny!!! I love it and i wish the movie was this way.

on Jun. 13 2010 at 1:31 pm
lmao! SUPPER FUNNY! i love it imma tell morgan seth and austin tomarow about it so they can hear lol hilrerous very well done *big appluase* :)

dancer13 GOLD said...
on Jun. 13 2010 at 12:18 pm
dancer13 GOLD, Troy, Michigan
19 articles 0 photos 98 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them." ~Jane Austen

nightlight was hilarious until the end. then it kind of chickened out. worth a read though, i'd say. :)

on Jun. 13 2010 at 10:32 am
celloizmylife PLATINUM, Atlanta, Georgia
27 articles 0 photos 72 comments

Favorite Quote:
Around here, however, we don't look backwards for very long.
We keep moving forward, opening up new doors and doing new things, because we're curious.....And curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.
-Walt Disney

Ha, I loved it. There's this new book called Nightlight that's a parody of Twilight, but it's too long for me to read it until I'm really bored. This was great in that I could have a few laughs and it was short enough. Short and sweet right? Awesome!

on Jun. 12 2010 at 10:46 pm
HeatherBee BRONZE, I Live In, Texas
1 article 0 photos 1985 comments

Favorite Quote:
Go on and try to tear me down. I will be rising from the ground, like a skyscraper

Love is louder than the pressure to be perfect

hehehe i loved it!!!!!

on Jun. 12 2010 at 10:34 pm
TanazMasaba GOLD, Dhaka, Other
16 articles 10 photos 214 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching,
Love like you'll never be hurt,
Sing like there's nobody listening,
And live like it's Heaven on Earth."













---William W. Purkey

love dis way more dan da new moon movie! god u r funny! u hav got a serious talent, trust me!

on Jun. 12 2010 at 5:58 pm
Inherinerd GOLD, Ashland, Ohio
16 articles 9 photos 302 comments

Favorite Quote:
A word to the wise ain't nessecary it's the stupid ones that need the advise

Hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love it and its pretty much exactly what happens!!!

if somebody could take a look at my work it would be greatly appreciated!



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