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You and I

Author's note: Dedication J., I see your eyes everywhere I go, a pair of startling stars blinking...  Show full author's note »
Author's note: Dedication


I see your eyes everywhere I go, a pair of startling stars blinking back at me. You’re so far out of reach now, and yet your presence haunts me like a chasing shadow, twisting and twirling beneath my feet in a dancing ribbon, which threatens to strangle me to death. I can’t breathe–not until I find my way back to you.
Maybe I should stop chasing the past and move forward; it’s the only way to make sense of this: the truths I find amidst the sea of lies. Yet, where I’m going you can’t come along for the ride. God, I’m terribly afraid. Even now, I feel you slipping through my fingers like water, my mind struggling to remember what the future threatens to destroy. I can’t let you go.
So, I won’t.
I refuse to forget who changed my life forever. You forced me to find myself, and in finding you, I found God. It’s the truth; I don’t lie. You made me believe that there’s something better. You taught me to count the little miracles, because sometimes, the small gifts, well, they’re the really big ones.
You’re a miracle. Never let anyone tell you differently. I love you, forever and always.
I can only pray that in writing this book my words will lead you back to me in some permanent way, and also into the hearts of us all.

*This piece is SO important to me. It's very close to my heart. I want to share it with you. Although this story is based on a true story, all names, places, and events are fictional*  « Hide author's note
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Chosen One

The envelope was a pale moon, thin and narrow, and trembling in my hands. God, I wanted this opportunity. Yeah, I also wanted the title and all that it implied. Who didn’t? I was a teenager, so yes, I was naïve and all the little things were the big ones.
Looking around my first period science room, I could see that a pile of other kids in my class were already tearing open their envelopes. Shouts of joy and groans of despair filled the room like a giant, lolling wave, raising some people up and pulling others underneath. I was going to the ride the waves from now on, I told myself silently.
With one impatient thrust of my fingers, I felt the envelope break open like tissue paper. It read,

Congratulations! Casey, you have been personally selected as one of the 2010-2011 school year Community Living Program (CLP) Peer Supporters. Return this letter to the office by June 1st to confirm your entry in this course.

Wishing you all the best,

Mrs. Maureen and Mrs. White

Crap. This wasn’t the news I’d expected. It wasn’t what I wanted. However, little did I know, this experience was what I needed.


I delivered the letter in confirmation of my choice a day later. I had told Mrs. Maureen and Mrs. White that I was interested in being a Peer Supporter. I still was; that intrigue hadn’t changed.
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