Mr. Unemployed

October 23, 2009
By bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
24 articles 16 photos 644 comments

Favorite Quote:
You were born an origanal why die a copy?The secret to success is the consistency to pursue.To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.To receive the right answer,you must ask the right question.Don't worry be happy! :)


His jeans have holes,
His shoes are well worn.
His head's hung low,
His spirit is torn.
His hair is greasy,
His face paints a frown.
His heart is broken,
His spirit is down.
His hands are scarred,
His eyes filled with tears,
His body displays the pain.
He's lived with for years.
His wallet is empty,
His house was foreclosed.
His dreams are demolished,
His mind consumed with woes.
His body is weary,
His faith has been shaken.
His bills are unpaid,
His job was taken.
His life has been altered,
His future he'll rewrite.
His world's a struggle,
His every day's a fight.


The author's comments:
I live in Michigan and with it having the highest unemployment rate in the country, I was inspired to write this poem.

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This article has 56 comments.


on Jul. 26 2014 at 11:13 am
Lysander PLATINUM, Bangalore, Other
40 articles 0 photos 87 comments

Favorite Quote:
I slay.

Gr8 work!  

on Mar. 21 2012 at 9:25 am
Stleemusic SILVER, Genvea, Alabama
7 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
life's to short to put up with other peoples bull. just take the time to stop and think and do what makes you happy

this poem relly speaks to me keep writing

 


on Dec. 24 2011 at 5:15 pm
AbandonedSoul BRONZE, Baldwin Park, California
3 articles 2 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"For it so falls out
That what we have we prize not to the worth,
Whiles we enjoy it, but being lack’d and lost,
Why, then we rack the value; then we find
The virtue, that possession would not show us
Whiles it was ours" - William Shakespeare

It is definitely a decent poem, but how is this a sonnet?

on Dec. 2 2011 at 8:19 pm
brynnibooo BRONZE, Huntington, West Virginia
1 article 0 photos 13 comments
This is pretty good. You have a good idea here.  would add some more imagery. "His hair is greasy, his face paints a frown." is good! I can clearly picture it! but in poetry there are words are more "telling us" rather than "showing us". I would maybe change words like "broken" "empty" and "fight". "shaken" is a really good word in this poem! Also, I really like the ending four lines! Very powerful! If you wouldn't mind, I would love for you to read and rate some of my poems! -Keep Writing!

Desti_B SILVER said...
on Nov. 10 2011 at 8:49 pm
Desti_B SILVER, Arima, Other
9 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
haven't decided on one lol..sorry

lol...one word...BOOM! lol...i read it and i was lliterally like..it couldn't be better...i love the rhyme scheme and the message is a realistic one....a bit sad tho..but good non the less...

Lexie96 GOLD said...
on Nov. 3 2011 at 7:48 pm
Lexie96 GOLD, Havana, Illinois
11 articles 0 photos 378 comments

Favorite Quote:
Now Cinderella don't you go to sleep, it's such a bitter form of refuge, oh don't you know the kingdom's under siege, and everbody needs you. - The Killers

This is really good and gives a very good picture of this man... great job.

Check out my work if you get the chance?


matt h said...
on Apr. 6 2011 at 11:54 am
Very deep poem, I could invision this! Great job man!

on Aug. 1 2010 at 11:13 pm
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
24 articles 16 photos 644 comments

Favorite Quote:
You were born an origanal why die a copy?The secret to success is the consistency to pursue.To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.To receive the right answer,you must ask the right question.Don't worry be happy! :)

Hey, thank you so much for checking out my work! I enjoyed your work also...you'll have to let me know your work gets posted!

on Aug. 1 2010 at 10:41 am
Joob-Stache GOLD, Rice Lake, Wisconsin
16 articles 0 photos 96 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't be afraid to take a chance, to take a fall, in the end it could be worth it all<3

Hey, you posted a comment on one of my poems and I thought that I'd just come see some of yours.... You are a very good writer and I hope that you will continue to wright throughout your whole life.... Don't ever stop if it's something you love... I have been there and done that and I don't think that you should have to go through that.... I'm goona be posting new poems soon...... Come check 'em out....Thanx

on Jun. 21 2010 at 12:31 pm
ShenelleCrystal SILVER, M, New York
7 articles 0 photos 186 comments

Favorite Quote:
Laugh your heart out dance in the rain cherish the memories ignore the pain love + learn forget and forgive because remember you only have [one life to live] ♥

omg ! congrats :)

on Jun. 21 2010 at 11:28 am
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
24 articles 16 photos 644 comments

Favorite Quote:
You were born an origanal why die a copy?The secret to success is the consistency to pursue.To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.To receive the right answer,you must ask the right question.Don't worry be happy! :)

Thank u so much:) this happens to be one of my own fav pieces...it was actually published in my local magazine!

on Jun. 18 2010 at 3:01 pm
ShenelleCrystal SILVER, M, New York
7 articles 0 photos 186 comments

Favorite Quote:
Laugh your heart out dance in the rain cherish the memories ignore the pain love + learn forget and forgive because remember you only have [one life to live] ♥

Very deep , your AMAZING !

I love ALLLLLLLLL your pieces


on Apr. 21 2010 at 12:22 pm
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
24 articles 16 photos 644 comments

Favorite Quote:
You were born an origanal why die a copy?The secret to success is the consistency to pursue.To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.To receive the right answer,you must ask the right question.Don't worry be happy! :)

Thank you. I see what being unemployed does to people first hand...and I wanted to share their pain with the people who are lucky and don't have to deal with such stress. So thank you for taking the time to read and comment on my poem...It's truly appreciated:)

RaV3n said...
on Apr. 14 2010 at 9:01 am
RaV3n, Saugus, Massachusetts
0 articles 0 photos 9 comments
Very deep, and tells what really these people go through but for them its normal and for people who are lucky sometimes just dont understand

on Jan. 25 2010 at 9:41 am
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
24 articles 16 photos 644 comments

Favorite Quote:
You were born an origanal why die a copy?The secret to success is the consistency to pursue.To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.To receive the right answer,you must ask the right question.Don't worry be happy! :)

Well read my other poems that have lots of comments n they aren't just casual chatting

on Jan. 23 2010 at 10:34 am
9CatsPerLife101 PLATINUM, Fairfax, Virginia
20 articles 0 photos 96 comments
uhm wow ok this isn't a bad poem, not at all, but with 40 comments i expected everyone to talk about how deep it was, if it was, and now it's like a chat room talking about something other than the poem. sorry but i don't think this deserves to eb on the most commented list. but it's a decent poem.

on Jan. 22 2010 at 6:27 pm
Babygurl_101 SILVER, N/A, California
8 articles 0 photos 118 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Angels are the quiet girls that just havent been noticed yet"
"The past is the past, and i am your futuer." (<3<3<3<3<3)

he still wants to be with me...and i still really like him... i jus dont kno wat 2 do... all my friends disapprove cuz they all kno he hurt me twice, so they disapprove of him....

on Jan. 22 2010 at 9:37 am
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
24 articles 16 photos 644 comments

Favorite Quote:
You were born an origanal why die a copy?The secret to success is the consistency to pursue.To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.To receive the right answer,you must ask the right question.Don't worry be happy! :)

boys...are so confusing!!!!

Me n my current bf went through that but we decided to have an open relationship but then we realized the only one we want is each other:)

Maybe it'll work out like that for u;)

on Jan. 19 2010 at 9:05 pm
Babygurl_101 SILVER, N/A, California
8 articles 0 photos 118 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Angels are the quiet girls that just havent been noticed yet"
"The past is the past, and i am your futuer." (<3<3<3<3<3)

i guess.... i am jus so sad... i still love him so much... he only broke up with me because he wanted to explore with other gurls.... and now he tells me that he still loves me, and he 'mite' wanna get bk 2gether... its so confusing... =/

on Jan. 19 2010 at 8:45 am
bluemagnet22 PLATINUM, Dearborn Hts, Michigan
24 articles 16 photos 644 comments

Favorite Quote:
You were born an origanal why die a copy?The secret to success is the consistency to pursue.To the world you may be one person,but to one person you may be the world.To receive the right answer,you must ask the right question.Don't worry be happy! :)

Awe I'm so sry:(

trust me theres more fish in the sea n it's his loss not urs:)


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