Birds

January 20, 2014
By JRaye PLATINUM, Dorr, Michigan
JRaye PLATINUM, Dorr, Michigan
43 articles 10 photos 527 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you build your house far enough away from Trouble, then Trouble will never find you."

"Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, 'I just don't care.'?"


The girls all laugh
at what they are expected to
She doesn't think
of what she is expected to

The girls all know
How different one of their own is
How she sees the world
in notes, beats, rhythm and music


And she looks, up
from the crowd
Beautifully, they
sing and dance on stage

She wants to fly away


The boys all play
For the status they are meant to
He doesn't play
For anyone but himself

The boys, they know
How different one of their own is
Watching his world
Crash and burn because they don't put him in


So he looks, down
From the couch
on TV, they
Have won another game

He wants to fly away


One day she'll go
Where musicians are meant to
One day he'll go
Where football stars are meant to

Nobody knows
How different one of their own is
We go along
with what's simple, easy, and safest
with what's stupid, lazy, and lamest


I look up
The birds look down
on the world, they
Have managed to escape

I look up
From the ground
at the birds; Say
Before we all break...

We have to fly away.


The author's comments:
Critics are always welcome - How can I get as many people to feel for this as possible?

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This article has 10 comments.


JRaye PLATINUM said...
on Jun. 28 2014 at 6:21 pm
JRaye PLATINUM, Dorr, Michigan
43 articles 10 photos 527 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you build your house far enough away from Trouble, then Trouble will never find you."

"Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, 'I just don't care.'?"

Thank you, I'm glad you liked it! :)

on Jun. 25 2014 at 10:08 pm
HayatC. PLATINUM, Louisville, Kentucky
25 articles 0 photos 59 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one."

Wow, this gives me so much hope and I absolutely love how you're addressing everyone at the last part of the poem! Very relateable and quite astonishing, great job!

JRaye PLATINUM said...
on Feb. 28 2014 at 6:55 pm
JRaye PLATINUM, Dorr, Michigan
43 articles 10 photos 527 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you build your house far enough away from Trouble, then Trouble will never find you."

"Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, 'I just don't care.'?"

Wow! Thank you, I'm honored! :) loved your Red Cannon by the way, such an engaging story!

on Feb. 28 2014 at 12:55 pm
theblondechick GOLD, Kingsport, Tennessee
14 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
I want to live and feel all the shades, tones, and variations of mental and physical experience possible in life.
And I am horribly limited.
-Sylvia Path

I love this so much! (I added it onto my favorites list) It's beauitful

JRaye PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 31 2014 at 1:37 pm
JRaye PLATINUM, Dorr, Michigan
43 articles 10 photos 527 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you build your house far enough away from Trouble, then Trouble will never find you."

"Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, 'I just don't care.'?"

Thank you, I really appreciate it :) And no prob, working on another short story now :)

HudaZav SILVER said...
on Jan. 30 2014 at 5:33 pm
HudaZav SILVER, Toronto, Other
8 articles 6 photos 392 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Nothing is impossible; the word itself says 'I'm possible'!" -Audrey Hepburn

relateable and amazing ! i love the meaning behind this, post up more work soon =)

JRaye PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 26 2014 at 6:37 pm
JRaye PLATINUM, Dorr, Michigan
43 articles 10 photos 527 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you build your house far enough away from Trouble, then Trouble will never find you."

"Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, 'I just don't care.'?"

When hey again! :) You're so sweet, thank you, it means so much to me :)

JRaye PLATINUM said...
on Jan. 26 2014 at 6:36 pm
JRaye PLATINUM, Dorr, Michigan
43 articles 10 photos 527 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If you build your house far enough away from Trouble, then Trouble will never find you."

"Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, 'I just don't care.'?"

Thanks so much :)

on Jan. 26 2014 at 5:43 am
Ray--yo PLATINUM, Kathmandu, Other
43 articles 2 photos 581 comments

Favorite Quote:
God Makes No Mistakes. (Gaga?)
"I have hated the words and I have loved them, and I hope I have made them right." -Liesel Meminger via Markus Zusac, "The Book Thief"

So I was randomly giving feedbacks on link on the chat when, yet again, I stumbled upon you. Beautifully written, relatable, and effective, I like your title, and the amazing ending, too. All places where words 'up' and 'down' were used were beautiful. Congratulations. S

on Jan. 25 2014 at 6:05 pm
BabyBean BRONZE, Kaysville, Utah
2 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
It's hard to get out of the barrel. It's slippery around the edges and people are happy to see you fall back in. -RDJ

Absolutley stunning. Amazing work, and this is coming from a non-poetry lover! 


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