Two Halves of a Broken Mirror

January 23, 2018
By LaneyK. BRONZE, Noblesville, Indiana
LaneyK. BRONZE, Noblesville, Indiana
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Words come from my mouth faster than I can process
I cannot control what formulates on the way out
They should be words of love and uplifting support
Instead, they choose to be fighting words, very powerful, without a doubt


These words, sentences, letters, whatever you choose to call them
These words hurt people, more than I ever knew
I never thought it would be ended with some words, or a collection of words.
Because you saw them one way, and I had a completely different view


I am care free, I am wild, I am spontaneous and fun
I go through life with a positive spin on anything and everything
I laugh through the pain, and smile through the darkness
And in my world, I am the ruler of my own fate, I am the king


I decide how I look at life, and how I take the punches that life throws
I control my life, and no one else can control it for me
Its not up to another to dictate my mood or disposition
and if I am sad, I always look at the bright side, because to me, there is no other way to be


In some ways, I consider myself to be very smart, well educated
But in other aspects, I am extremely ignorant, I simply don't understand
I look at you, I look at you with such confusion
How could someone be so ungrateful, and let their sadness get so out of hand?


You are someone that I couldn't relate to, and I didn't get
The way you see the glass half empty, it got me every time
Because you had a better life than most, and had a family
And for someone who wanted to be at the top and control his life, you didn't enjoy the climb


You walked through life blind of the good, and all too knowing of the bad
You were not one to appreciate the little things, as I am
It was not an easy life to live, it was one that caused a lot of suffering
You were in pain, more than I will ever know or understand


I tried my best to help
I wanted to help with every ounce of my soul
But some people are so far gone that they cannot be saved
Some put on a mask and try to become as numb as possible, cold


Living a reckless life, you were too easy to love and easy to lose
I got connected to you, and I cared so much about you
And what we had was destructive, toxic, poisonous
But my fondness for you grew, and grew, and grew


I never gave up on you, and never gave up on us
But I was not healthy for you, and it showed with every passing day
You forgave me over and over, trying to grasp harder and harder with every break of your heart
Until one day, you decided not to, and you left without giving me any say


We had so many memories, that I look back on with only happiness
Because a day spent with you was never a day wasted
So many adventures with you would present themselves, and we never missed a shot
But now, no more memories can be made, only remembered, only tasted


One adventure is particular now holds the most significance
And it’s one I will never forget
We were in an abandoned warehouse, exploring
The path unknown, the future not yet set


We held on to each other with excitement and fear
As we wandered in farther and farther
Until we spotted a broken mirror
Shattered into pieces, which stopped our departure


I thought it was impossible to find two pieces that were alike
And I challenged you so
But you proved me wrong, as you walked into the room with the shattered mirror
And came out with two identical pieces in tow


Those mirrors became a symbol
A symbol of what we had.
But things get misplaced
And people leave, forgetting what they had.


Just like that, you were gone, out of my life forever
And words cannot describe how much I miss you everything you are, good or bad
You were my best friend, my knight in shining armor
Without you, my soul is lonely with no ties, a wanderer, a nomad


But in the end, it is best for you for it to be this way
Because it was toxic, and it broke you more and more the more time you spent with me
I never meant to hurt you, I never meant to make you cry so hard or so often
What we had was a seed that grew, got poisoned, and turned into a rotten, dead tree


I am reminded of you every day, even if you have long been gone
You are everywhere, in small things and small memories in my cluttered brain
I wish you were never here, so I would never have had this torture in the first place
But I wouldn't trade you for anything, I can endure the pain


Those words, those words that I have said, I can never take them back
They will always be with you, be with us
All we can do is go about life, trying to not remember, to forget we ever existed
I just wish I could take them back, but it is not even an option to discuss


All I can say is that I want to turn back time, knowing it is impossible
I wish I could take my half of the broken mirror
I would put it somewhere a lot safer, somewhere it could never get misplaced and lost
So I could have it, even if I don't have you


But I lost my piece of the mirror
And, just like how that warehouse got bulldozed to the ground,
I lost you.

The author's comments:

I lost my best friend and my boyfriend all in one. I went through soemthing terrible. I want people to know that everything happens for a reason, and the memories will never fade. Keep the memories close.

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